Gone
by ellabelle12
Summary: An act of violence threatens the life she's built and leaves Erica wondering if the past is ever really Set in 2006, featuring Erica, Jack, David, Bianca, Kendall, Greenlee, Babe and
1. Chapter 1

_Author's Note: I am still working on "The Truth Shall Set You Free" and "Erica's Secret," but I also have this story that is close to completion that I've been meaning to share. Feedback is always welcome. I hope you enjoy!_

Chapter 1

"Do you want me to drop you off at the studio?" Jackson Montgomery asked his wife as he sat down on the sofa with a cup of coffee and a plate.

His wife, Erica Kane, looked up from her tea and a stack of papers. "That's very sweet of you, but no thank you. I have a late breakfast meeting at the Valley Inn, and then I'll be in the office the rest of the day."

Jack nodded. It was rare their schedules coincided enough for them to share a ride to work, but he always offered. Even married it was hard to find time alone together.

"Hey J! Hey Erica!" Jack's recently-adopted son, Reggie, came running down the stairs at high speed and darted into the living room. He reached over and grabbed a croissant off Jack's plate.

"Um, excuse me?" Jack said, startled by the sudden theft of breakfast.

"Gotta run. Bus is coming, but seriously dude, croissants? Bring on the bacon and eggs next time!" Reggie tossed over his shoulder as he headed for the front door. He paused suddenly and turned on his heel to look at his father and stepmother. "Yo J – where's Lily?"

"Outside waiting for the bus already." Jack said dryly. Lily was exceedingly punctual.

Reggie looked slightly embarrassed as he grabbed his backpack. "Oh. Yeah. Okay, later!" He yelled as he ran out the door, slamming it behind him.

Jack laughed and turned back to Erica who shook her head slightly. "Teenagers," he said with a shrug of his shoulders. Moments later they both heard the sound of the school bus as it made its way down the street toward the Kane-Montgomery house. Once he was fairly certain the bus had gone, Jack turned to his wife.

"I do believe that we are officially ALONE," he said suggestively.

Erica raised an eyebrow. "We are. And normally I'd appreciate that look in your eyes, but I have a lot of prep work still to do before I go to this meeting."

"Can't you reschedule?" he asked.

She shook her head. "No, I can't. I'm sorry, Jack. This is for sweeps. But once all of this chaos settles down at the studio, I promise I'll cut back some, and we can spend more time together."

He stood up and slipped his suit jacket on. "I am going to hold you to that, Mrs. Montgomery," he said with a smile.

"Good. I'd expect nothing less," Erica said, tilting her head back so he could kiss her goodbye.

A few minutes later, Jack pulled out of the driveway in his silver Lexus sedan, giving a quick glance back at the house he and Erica shared. God he was lucky. Life was going pretty damn good for him and Erica, and he had a feeling it was only going to get better.

He never noticed the man down the street who watched his every move.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Approximately 30 minutes after Jack left for his law office, Erica retouched her makeup and gathered her papers for her meeting. She slipped a long ivory jacket over her bright pink sleeveless dress and checked her reflection in the large mirror in the foyer. Perfect, as usual. Well, maybe not perfect, but all things considered, she was pleased with the way her appearance had withstood the ravages of time.

She was gathering her car keys, phone and purse when the doorbell rang. She glanced up and frowned when she saw a uniformed delivery man through the glass of the front door. She wasn't expecting a package, but perhaps Jack or one of the kids had ordered something. She put her things back down on the table in the foyer and went to the door.

"Delivery for Erica Kane," the man said, looking down at his clipboard. A large box was on the ground beside him.

"Yes, that's me," she said. She noticed that he was wearing a hat that matched his uniform, but other than that, she didn't bother to even glance at the man's face as she reached out to take the clipboard from him. He was just a delivery man, and she assumed he needed her signature.

Suddenly and unexpectedly, the man's hand shot out toward her, and she felt a fist slam into her abdomen. She doubled over in pain and shock as the breath was knocked out of her. She gasped but was unable to catch her breath fast enough to scream before his hands reached for her shoulders and shoved her backward. She lost her balance and fell back onto the hard tile floor of the foyer.

The man silently bent down and picked up the box before he stepped into the house and closed the front door behind him.

Erica landed hard on the floor, wincing as pain shot through her hip. She clutched her stomach as she attempted to get back on her feet, silently cursing as her stiletto heel slid on the tile and her ankle twisted underneath her.

She had barely staggered to her feet when a hand grabbed a fistful of her hair. She screamed both in pain and fear and tried to turn so she could at least hit or kick at this unknown assailant, but his arms were around her, and she could barely move. She screamed for help, as loudly as she possibly could, praying that a neighbor might hear her and realize something was amiss. A foul-smelling cloth was forced over her nose and mouth. She clawed at the hand over her face, but it was no use – eventually she had to take a breath, and when she did, the room began to go dark around her, and she lost quickly consciousness.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

It was late-morning when Jack walked out of the courtroom and parted ways with his client. He wondered if Erica was finished with her meeting at the Valley Inn. He toyed with the idea of calling her to see how it went, but he didn't want to interrupt her. He slid into his car and pulled his cell phone out of his jacket pocket. Now free from the courthouse, he switched it back on and frowned at the number of missed calls.

He started up the car and buckled his seatbelt as he listened to his voicemail, expecting to hear about a development in an on-going case. He frowned as he listened to a message from Erica's long-time assistant, Val.

"Mr. Montgomery, this is Val calling from your wife's office. I'm trying to reach Miss Kane, and she's not answering her phone. If you know where she is, please call me or ask her to call me."

"Mr. Montgomery, this is Val again. I don't want to worry you, but Miss Kane is very late for her breakfast meeting this morning, and that's not like her. If you know how to reach her, please call me."

"Mr. Montgomery, it's me again. Miss Kane was a no-show this morning, and no one can locate her. I've already checked with her friends and family. PLEASE call me as soon as you get this message."

Jack pulled the car out of the parking lot so fast the tires squealed. He had last seen Erica at home, so he drove that direction, dialing her cell phone as he drove. It went straight to voicemail. He tried to keep his voice calm as he left her a message.

"Sweetheart, it's me. Val is trying to reach you, and he's in a panic. To be honest, you've got me a little worried too. Call me as soon as you get this message. I love you."

He hung up and dialed Val's number as he sped down the road. Minutes later, he pulled into his driveway and cursed as he hung up the phone. Val still hadn't heard from Erica, and she'd missed her morning meeting entirely. He moved to unlock the front door, but it was already unlocked.

"Erica?" he yelled as he stepped inside. "Erica? It's Jack, are you in here?"

He froze at the sight of her cell phone on the table in the foyer. She never went anywhere without that damn phone. Erica forgetting her phone was one thing, but Erica missing an important meeting was unheard of. Something was very, very wrong.

Jack did a quick search of the house, but was no sign of Erica anywhere. Her car was still parked in the garage, and her phone was still on the entry table, next to her car keys and the stack of papers she'd been perusing that morning in preparation for her meeting, but her purse appeared to be missing. She was gone.

There were no visible signs of a struggle or a break-in, but he felt certain something bad had happened to Erica. With shaking hands, he reached for his own phone again and called the police.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Blackness slowly gave way to light. Erica blinked a few times and tried to clear the haze from her eyes. She could make out fuzzy images but nothing clear yet. She closed her eyes again and tried to figure out why she couldn't see very well. It all came crashing back to her: the delivery man at her front door, the package he had for her, the violent way that he'd attacked her.

She sucked in a deep breath, noting the soreness in her abdomen as she did so. No one had ever punched her in the stomach like that before. Her hand fluttered to her stomach. That was a good sign – at least her hands weren't tied. She opened her eyes and tried to focus her vision. She thought she was staring at the ceiling, and there was something soft underneath her. She must be lying on a bed.

She slowly pushed herself into a seated position, praying that the room wouldn't spin. Her head ached and she felt drunk, but she knew that wasn't possible. Someone had to have drugged her. She choked back a sob at the thought of being drugged against her will, after everything she'd been through to regain and maintain her sobriety. Who would do something like this to her? And more importantly, how in the world could she get away from him?

She rubbed her eyes and tried to focus. Her vision was slowly coming back and she was still wearing all of her clothes. Those were both good signs.

She shifted on the bed and tried to reassure herself that she was physically okay, minus the drugging. Her stomach and hip were both sore, and she had some pain in her swollen left ankle. She touched it gingerly and winced in pain. She must have twisted it when she attempted to run from her attacker. Damn stilettos. She ran her fingers through her hair, noting that her scalp was still tender where he'd grabbed her by the hair.

She took in a few deep breaths of relief at the realization that whatever had happened after she passed out had at least not involved any more violence against her.

She swung her legs over the side of the bed and looked around the room. Nothing looked remotely familiar to her. The room was small, barely large enough to hold a bed, a chair and a small table. All of the furniture had a rustic feel to it. There was no window in the room, but there were three doors. She assumed one was a closet and one led to the rest of the building. She wasn't sure about the third door, but she guessed it was likely a bathroom or another closet. The walls were bare, and two of them appeared to be constructed of wood logs.

Her heart sank at the rustic appearance of the furniture and the walls. This place had the feel of a cabin in the woods somewhere, and if it was, she couldn't be in Pine Valley. She had no idea how long she'd been unconscious, what time it was, or how far from home she'd been taken.

She wanted desperately to know who had taken her and why, but she was also afraid for him to come back for fear of what he'd do to her next.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

The elegant Kane-Montgomery house had turned into something akin to Grand Central Station. Pine Valley's police chief, Derek Frye, had been there for hours, questioning Erica's family and friends. His officers had dusted the home for prints, and they were busy examining Erica's phone, personal laptop and work computer for any clues as to where she could be.

Lily had been unable to handle the chaos, so Reggie had taken her to Jack's old loft apartment where it was quiet. He hadn't wanted to leave, but Jack had more or less demanded it. He wanted to protect his children as much as possible. Erica's children, on the other hand, couldn't be protected. Val had called Kendall that morning looking for Erica, so Kendall was at the house, worked into a state of such anxiety and frustration that she reminded Jack very much of Erica. He'd tried to avoid notifying Bianca, but somehow the press had gotten wind of Erica's sudden disappearance, and he'd been forced to call his niece before she could read about it on the internet. He reassured her in the calmest voice possible that she didn't need to get on a plane back to Pine Valley. Not yet, anyway.

"Why wasn't Coral here?" Kendall demanded.

Jack squeezed the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger. "She had a root canal scheduled this morning. Erica gave her off the rest of the week to recover," he said.

"We've verified that your mother's maid was indeed at the dentist this morning," Derek added.

"Who would want to kidnap my mother?" Kendall asked, her voice a mixture of anger and fear.

"I don't know," Jack said honestly. "We're working on a list of people who could have a reason to want to hurt Erica, but we don't even know what the motive is right now. There's been no ransom demand yet, so I don't think someone is doing this for financial gain. If this isn't a ransom scenario… I don't know."

He looked up at Kendall, who was still pacing around the living room. "Okay, well, then if it's not a ransom, who would want to kidnap her and why? Revenge? For what?" she asked

Jack shook his head. "Erica is a public figure. We could be dealing with an obsessed fan for all we know."

"But there was no forced entry. My mother wouldn't open the door to a random fan," Kendall insisted. Jack had to admit that she was right.

Derek answered his cell phone, turning away from them for a moment.

"Would she open the door to a delivery man?" Derek asked a few moments later.

Jack and Kendall looked at each other and both shrugged. "I guess," Jack said. "But I don't think we were expecting a delivery. Why?"

"Your neighbor across the street says he saw a delivery man bring a large box to your front door this morning." Derek said.

Jack looked around in confusion. "I didn't see anything when I came home," he said.

"I know. I'll be back. Don't go anywhere," he said to both Jack and Kendall as he stalked out of the living room.

It took a while, but Derek was finally able to confirm that a neighbor witnessed a delivery man bringing a large box to the front door, but no box had been found in or around the house, and calls to Fed-Ex, UPS, and all other known delivery services in town could not turn up any record of a delivery to Jack and Erica's home address.

Zach brought up the disturbing possibility that whoever had taken Erica had removed her from the house in the box, a suggestion that sent Kendall into hysterics. As far as Derek was concerned, it made sense. No one who regularly interacted with Erica had reported seeing her after Jack left for work, and her family and friends were adamant that she wouldn't have left the house with a stranger. The regular limousine service she used had been contacted as well, and they confirmed that no, they hadn't come to pick up Ms. Kane. Erica was certainly petite enough that she could be easily carried by the average man, especially if he only had to carry her a short distance from the front door to a delivery van.

Derek had asked each family member present for a list of names of people they thought might even remotely want to harm Erica. He wanted them to include everyone they could think of, no matter how unrealistic they may be as a kidnapper. He compared lists and then looked up at Erica's family.

"Michael Cambias?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

"What? You said no matter how unrealistic, and Michael Cambias hated my mother." Kendall said.

"I'm pretty sure that 'dead' means not capable of kidnapping Erica," Greenlee said dryly from her seat on the sofa next to her father.

"Um, yes, dead people don't have to be on this list," Derek said. "Which means that we can also cross off Alexander Cambias, Sr., Richard Fields, Vanessa Bennett and both Braden and Jonathan Lavery."

Everyone turned and looked at Kendall again.

"My mother is MISSING, okay people. I'm upset, and I'm not thinking clearly."

Zach patted Kendall's arm in support.

Derek looked over the rest of the admittedly brief lists. "David Hayward. David Hayward. Krystal Carey. Babe Carey Chandler. JR Chandler. Jonathan Kinder. Greenlee Lavery."

Derek raised an eyebrow at Kendall and Zach.

"You put ME on the list?" Greenlee screeched.

"What? You don't like Erica." Zach said with a nonchalant shrug. "The man said no matter how impractical or unrealistic it was. I don't think you kidnapped her - you're a bit too pregnant for that to be practical - but you definitely don't like her."

Jack pinched the bridge of his nose again and closed his eyes for a moment. "I think we can all safely assume that Greenlee did NOT kidnap Erica."

"Thank you," Greenlee said to Jack before rubbing her belly and glaring in annoyance at both Kendall and Zach.

"Derek, is there anyone else on the list?" Jack asked.

Derek looked back at the papers in his hands. "Trey Kenyon, Krystal Carey again and oh yes, there he is again, David Hayward. He's awfully popular, isn't he?"

"Trey Kenyon and Jonathan Kinder should both be behind bars already," Jack pointed out to Derek. The chief of police nodded in response. "I'll have someone verify that. In the meantime, we're going to check out every other name on your lists, along with anything suspicious that turns up on Erica's computers. If you think of anyone else who could have a reason to want to hurt Erica, please call me right away."


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Erica sat quietly on the bed. She'd already tried to get up from the bed, but she had trouble supporting weight on her ankle. That didn't bode well for planning an escape. She'd managed to hobble around the room enough to determine that one door did indeed lead to a small bathroom. It was equipped with some basic toiletries, but no razors or anything else that could be used as a weapon. The closet was completely empty.

She hadn't tried the third door, the one she assumed led to the rest of building. She knew the door was likely locked, but if it wasn't, she wanted to be sure she could make the most of her escape attempt. So far no one had come for her, and she'd not been able to hear anything. She'd been careful not to make any noise herself either, for fear of alerting her captor that she was conscious. If he thought she was still passed out, perhaps he'd let down his guard.

She wasn't sure how much time had passed since she'd first awakened in the room, but whatever drugs she'd been given seemed to be wearing off. With each passing minute, she felt more and more like herself as the haze seemed to lift from her mind. She wanted her wits about her when she tried to run. She had already debated trying to tear a strip of fabric from the cheap sheets to make a brace of some sort for her ankle, but she was afraid the sound of fabric tearing would alert someone.

She finally decided that she'd waited long enough. Her heart pounded in her chest and she limped to the door, trying to keep as much weight off of her ankle as possible. She drew in a long deep breath and tried to steady her nerves as her hand reached for the doorknob. She prayed it was unlocked and that there was a place for her to hide once she slipped out of the room.

To her immense surprise and relief, the doorknob did indeed turn in her hand. She slid the door open just a crack and waited to see if anyone responded. Hearing nothing, she pulled the door open a little further and peeked outside. She'd hoped to find herself in a darkened hallway where she could hide safely in the shadows, but to her dismay, her room opened into a larger room that appeared to be a combination living room/kitchen/eating area.

She still didn't see or hear anyone, so Erica opened the door and hobbled out. The small size and rustic appearance of this larger room confirmed her suspicion that this was a cabin of some kind, which meant that she must be in a fairly rural area. A fire burned in the stone fireplace, and lights were on in the room, but there were no other signs of life. She kept her back close to the wall as she looked quickly around the room. There was a door on the other side of the tiny kitchen that looked like it must lead to another interior room. Her eyes scanned the room again, desperately seeking the front door. She had no idea where she'd go once she got out the front door. Hell, she had no idea where she even was, but being outside of the cabin and further away from her attacker had to be better than being in here with him.

She finally spied the front door, and beside it a window. She drew in a sharp breath as she glanced out the window. It was dark outside. The idea that she'd been unconscious for most of the day disturbed her, but perhaps the darkness could aid in her escape. She slipped off her heels and tucked them securely in one hand. She would run quietly for the door in her bare feet, and she could put her shoes back on once she was outside and safe under cover of darkness.

She said a quick silent prayer and ran for the front door. The knob turned easily in her hand, and she flung it open. The rush of cold air burned her lungs and pushed the last bit of fogginess from her brain. She'd hoped that she could run somewhere, anywhere, and hide long enough to put her shoes back on, but a blanket of snow covered the ground.

It wasn't snowing in Pine Valley, at least it hadn't been this morning when she'd prepared to leave her house, so wherever she was, she must be quite far from home. She couldn't run barefooted in weather like this, and once she had her shoes on, she'd leave a trail of footprints in what looked to be at least six inches of snow. She paused to slip her shoes on, praying that she could run far enough away from the cabin that her attacker would lose her trail in the dark. She debated turning and searching for a blanket or something else she could use to protect herself from the elements, but she was afraid she'd lose what might be her only chance at escape. When it came right down to it, if her choices were freezing to death in the snow and being attacked by a crazy person, she was willing to take her chances with the cold.

Erica straightened up after slipping her heels back on. As she turned slightly to close the cabin door behind her, a hand grabbed her wrist.

"And just where do you think you're going?" A man's voice sounded behind her as he caught her wrist.

She jerked backward as hard as she could, but he held fast to her wrist. Somewhere in the back of her mind, the sound of his voice was familiar, but she didn't place it immediately.

He was much stronger than she was, and he easily pulled her back into the cabin. Erica saw her chance at escape disappearing, and she screamed for help as loud as she could, hoping desperately that someone was close enough to hear her.

Her attacker slammed the door closed and shoved her roughly against it. His face was close to hers now, and she finally got a good look at him. When she did, the color drained from her own face. He was much older now since she'd last seen him, but then again, so was she. He hadn't aged nearly as well. His face was lined with age and gray was clearly visible in his dark hair. He was sporting a five o'clock shadow, which initially made him harder for her to recognize, but the cold glare in his gray eyes was unmistakable.

After almost a decade, she was now once again face to face with Jonathan Kinder.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

"I see I've underestimated you. I thought for sure you'd still be unconscious. Apparently my technique is a little rusty. A decade in prison will do that to you," he said, his voice calm yet sinister.

Erica fought back a shudder. "You'll never get away with this, Jonathan," she said quietly, praying her voice wouldn't shake.

He smiled slightly but there was no warmth in his eyes. "So you do recognize me. I wondered if you would. As for getting away with it Erica, I already have. Look around you my dear. We're in the middle of nowhere. No one knows where you are, and no one can hear you scream."

Her eyes darted around the room. Perhaps there was another door, another exit she'd somehow missed. The kitchen! Surely there was at least a sharp knife of some kind in the kitchen. If she could just get past him… She had to keep him talking, distract him somehow.

"Why are you doing this?" she asked, trying to keep her voice steady.

He took a small step back from her then. "Isn't it obvious? Erica, darling, we belong together. I tried to make you see that before, but you wouldn't listen to reason. So you've left me no choice." he said, smiling again at her.

"Don't you think the police and the FBI are looking for you?" she asked. "You can't just escape from prison and think you won't get caught!"

He laughed and moved back even further from her, apparently unconcerned that she might dart away. Her heart pounded furiously in her chest as she realized that she might have enough room to make a run for the kitchen.

"Oh Erica. So naïve. I was paroled, you see. It could be weeks before some overworked parole agent realizes I'm not where I'm supposed to be," he said nonchalantly. "No one is looking for me."

Her stomach twisted at his words and the idea that no one in Pine Valley knew he was free to come after her. She tried to push that thought aside and focus only on getting away from him. She took advantage of the slight distance he'd put between them and slipped past him, running as fast as she could for the kitchen. She heard him call out her name, but she kept moving, grabbing the tile counter for support as she searched for something, anything she could use to fend him off.

She was so intent on finding a weapon of some kind that she didn't notice the blow until it was too late. His hand connected with her face with such force that she fell against the kitchen cabinets and tumbled to the floor. Intense pain radiated through the side of her face from her temple all the way down to her jaw. She brought her hand to her face in shock. She'd been slapped before, usually by a jealous female, but no one had ever hit her like this. She could taste blood in her mouth, but she was in too much pain for it to register that she'd apparently bitten the inside of her cheek when she fell.

"I can see that you're going to be difficult," Jonathan said as he stood over her. "You'll find though that I'm prepared for that."

Erica shrunk back against the cabinets as he leaned in toward her and grabbed her by the upper arm. He pulled her up into a standing position and began dragging her across the cabin. Between the injuries to her ankle and the brisk pace at which he was walking, she had trouble staying on her feet.

"Let go of me!" she screamed, pulling back against his grasp.

He held firmly onto her arm but otherwise ignored her until they were back in the tiny bedroom. Her room. Her prison cell. He flung her into the room, and she stumbled into the table, grabbing it as she tried to keep from falling again.

He came up behind her before she could stand up straight, pinning her against the small table. His hands went around her and reached for the buttons on her jacket. Erica shook her head in horror. No, this was not happening to her. This could not be happening. She screamed again and attempted to break free of his hold. He brought a hand to her throat and squeezed, effectively cutting off her scream.

"I am trying to take off your jacket. You'll be more comfortable without it, and it's much easier on both of us that way. I have no intention of removing your dress. Not yet anyway." he said calmly against her ear. Erica gasped for breath and fought back a shudder of revulsion as his other hand tore open the buttons on her jacket before shoving it roughly from her shoulders.

She expected him to release her, or at least let go of her throat once he had the jacket off, but he didn't. Her heart raced, and she tried to stem the rising tide of panic that filled her. He was doing something with his other hand, but she couldn't tell what. Tears welled in her eyes at the horror of what he could – and likely would – do to her.

"I always did love that fire in you, Erica dear," he said as he continued to hold her against him by the throat, indifferent to the way she clawed at his hand. "However, I can't let you leave, and I obviously can't trust you to sit nicely in your room like a good girl. So we're going to have to do this the hard way." With that, he jabbed a needle into her now bare upper arm.

She struggled against him in terror, realizing that he was injecting something else into her. The room spun as she felt him pull her toward the bed, but she couldn't fight back. It took everything she had in her to keep breathing. Darkness closed in on her moments later.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Late that night at the Pine Valley Hospital, Dr. David Hayward stopped off at the cardiac wing's nurses' station. Several nurses were gathered around a computer and were talking quietly amongst themselves.

"Ladies," he said suddenly, interrupting their discussion. "We have sick patients who I'm sure could use your attention, and they're more important than whatever you're looking at on the internet."

The small group disbanded with more than a few glances of irritation in David's direction. As two of the women walked past him, he thought he heard one of them mutter something about Erica Kane. His ears perked up at the mention of his former lover. He smiled and shook his head. He wondered what Erica was up to now that had obviously set tongues wagging. It probably had something to do with her new television show.

David told himself that he really didn't care what Erica was up to these days. She hated him for the role he'd played in keeping Bianca and Miranda apart, and after that, he'd likely never be on her good side again. It had been about two years since they'd last been a couple, at least as far as the public knew. They'd pretended to be lovers to give each other an alibi for the night Michael Cambias was murdered. He'd never admit it, especially not to Erica, but he missed her from time to time. He wished it hadn't ended so badly for the two of them, but there was nothing he could do about it now. It was done, and he couldn't change anything.

Still, curiosity got the better of him, and he couldn't resist peeking at the computer screen to see what had the nurses in such a state. He wondered briefly if Erica's fairy tale marriage to Jackson Montgomery was disintegrating. That would certainly be news- and gossip-worthy.

His blood ran cold when he saw the headline proclaiming that Erica Kane had been kidnapped.

After chastising the nurses, he didn't want anyone to see him surfing the internet out in the open, so he put down the patient charts he'd had in his hands and went straight to his office. He sat down at his computer and started pulling up local news stories on Erica's disappearance. He ran his fingers through his hair in frustration as he read. So far there were no suspects. God, he hoped she was okay.

David was in the midst of late night rounds when Derek Frye came looking for him.

"Dr. Hayward, I'd like to ask you a few questions."

David looked up in surprise at the Chief of Police. "Regarding?"

"The kidnapping of Erica Kane Montgomery" Derek said, his expression serious.

David scoffed. "Why? Do you think I did it?"

Derek looked with disdain at the doctor. He couldn't stand the man. Hayward constantly skirted the along the edge of the law, and he always seemed to get away with it, no matter what he did.

"Where were you this morning?" Derek asked.

David shook his head in annoyance. "I was at home," he said.

"Really? Can anyone verify that?" Derek asked.

"No, no one can. I live by myself," David said through near gritted teeth.

"What time did you come to the hospital today?"

"I'm working some odd hours to cover for another doctor. I got in around noon, and I've been here ever since. Getting ready to leave now. I'm sure you can confirm that with footage from the hospital's security cameras."

"Of course," Derek said. "So you have no way to prove your whereabouts prior to noon?"

"No, I don't, but I can assure you that I did not kidnap Erica Kane."

"Really?" Derek questioned, "Because her family seems to think that you have reason to want to hurt her. She did try to put you in jail not long ago."

David shook his head in frustration. This was so typical! He should have known that he'd get blamed for this. "Erica and I have our disputes and our differences, but I have way too much respect and grudging admiration for her to ever want to harm her. Besides, as you pointed out, she tried to put me in jail, and she failed. Why would I give her the chance to put me away long-term by committing a federal crime? I have nothing to gain by kidnapping Erica."

"I'd also like to point out the obvious," David continued.

"Which is?" Derek asked.

"If I'd kidnapped Erica Kane this morning, do you really think I'd be here at the hospital, tending to patients? Don't you think I'd be off somewhere holding her captive?"

"Care to prove it?" Derek retorted.

"Excuse me?"

"Will you consent to a police search of your property?" Derek asked.

David raised an eyebrow. "Do you have a search warrant, Chief?" he asked in a sarcastic voice, knowing full well the Chief of Police did not.

"If you give us permission, I don't need one."

David laughed bitterly. "Forget it. You come up with motive and probable cause and get your precious search warrant, and you can come on over. Until then, go to hell. I didn't kidnap Erica Kane, and I suggest you stop wasting your time and go find the bastard who did."

With that he turned on his heel and walked away, silently cursing the ineptness of the PVPD.

Derek declined to comment as David walked off. As much as he hated to admit it, the doctor's words had a ring of truth to them. So far his investigators had yet to turn up a motive for Hayward to act as the kidnapper. Still, his lack of an alibi and her family's insistence that Hayward and Erica disliked each other meant that they couldn't rule him out. Not yet.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Hours later – perhaps a few, perhaps more, she couldn't be sure - Erica stirred. Her head and her face ached and throbbed in pain. She blinked and realized that she was staring at the same ceiling again. Sobs welled in her chest at the last memory she had before being drugged again. She fought them back as she tried to shift herself into a seated position. She realized in horror then that both of her wrists were handcuffed to the wooden bed frame. She pulled frantically at the handcuffs but only managed to hurt her wrists and hands in the process.

When she realized that her dress and undergarments were still intact and apparently untouched, the tears she'd been fighting finally slipped down her cheeks. Her emotions were a swirling mess of relief and fear: relief that she hadn't been raped or hurt even worse, and fear that before this ordeal was all over, she would be.

Jonathan had placed a pillow or two under her head before handcuffing her to the bed, so her head was elevated enough that she could look around. She raised her left leg slightly and tried to focus her vision on her ankle. It looked worse than it had before, and it ached as well. Clearly running with an injured ankle hadn't been a great idea.

She closed her eyes again and thought back to the last few days, the last hours when her life had been more or less okay. Not perfect, it was never perfect, but it had been okay. She was married to Jack, and they had a beautiful home together, his Christmas gift to her. He was raising his teenaged children and focusing on his law practice, and her career had taken a new and fabulous turn with her television show "New Beginnings." Admittedly, she'd prefer it if Bianca and her sweet baby Miranda would move back home to Pine Valley, and it would be nice if Kendall could get over some of her own insecurities and settle down with a decent man, someone other than Zach Slater. And, well, if she was being completely honest, she could do without Greenlee in her life, but now that the widow Lavery was expecting, even Greenlee had mellowed and become more tolerable. Jack had reconciled himself to the idea of grandparenthood, and Erica, who'd been on Ryan's side in the constant 'Jack versus Ryan' fights that seemed to crop up frequently before his death, was admittedly happy for her stepdaughter, as long as no one expected this baby to refer to her as 'Grandma.'

Jack had offered to drive her to her meeting at the Valley Inn. Why hadn't she let him? She could have prepped for her meeting there and then called the car service to take her to the studio. She could have spent that time with him, and she'd have been safe with him when Kinder showed up on her doorstep.

Jack must be frantic by now. She had no idea what time it was, but she'd been gone at least all day and into the night. Surely Jack had alerted the police by now. They had to be searching for her by now. He'd never rest until he found her – she was certain of that. He was smart, smarter than Jonathan, and he'd surely figure out that Jonathan had kidnapped her, and he'd come for her. If she could just hold on for a few more hours, a few more days at most, Jack would rescue her, and she'd be safe in his arms again. She was sure of it.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Derek cursed again as he stood at the front door of Erica Kane's house. He couldn't believe the information he'd just been given. Jack was going to go ballistic when he heard the news. Not that he'd blame him. Someone had seriously screwed up, and it appeared that Erica was the one paying the price. He just hoped and prayed that they'd be able to find her before it got any worse.

Jack stood up expectantly when Derek came back into the house. He'd spent the night tossing and turning on the sofa, and he was still wearing his clothes from the day before. Zach had taken Kendall home, and Greenlee had brought Reggie and Lily back to the house. It was early morning, and with each passing hour, he feared that their chances of locating his wife alive and well were dimming. As a former district attorney, he was painfully aware of how the odds of locating a missing person fell with after the first 48 hours.

"Any news? Anything?" he asked the police chief.

Derek nodded grimly. "Yes, and while it's not good, my hope is that it's the break we need to find Erica. Jonathan Kinder was released from prison two months ago," he said flatly. No point in sugar-coating it.

Jack stared at his friend and colleague in shock. "What? Why? How?" he sputtered.

"The official word is budget cuts. The Department of Corrections decided to solve the problem of prison overcrowding by releasing a number of what they deemed 'model' prisoners. Thousands of prisoners have been paroled in the last few months to make up for budget shortfalls."

"But KINDER? The man is crazy!" Jack insisted.

"According to the reports from the prison, he's been a model prisoner from the beginning. They never had any problems from him and believed that his education and professional background made him a likely candidate to succeed in society should he be released," Derek said.

"Wait – we never got any notice about a parole hearing. Erica absolutely would have testified against him to keep him locked up." Jack said suddenly.

Derek looked uncomfortable. "According to the DOC, a letter was sent to Erica a few months ago, but it looks like it went to her old address. I don't know if it got lost in the mail and was never forwarded to her here or if it arrived and simply got misplaced with the move."

"Derek, please tell me you know where Kinder is now," Jack said, praying that the psychotic former doctor was dutifully attending all meetings with his parole officer.

"Unfortunately no, we don't. He continued his good behavior until about a week ago, and then he disappeared. More parolees mean more people each parole officer has to see, and Kinder managed to fall through the cracks."

Jack cursed under his breath.

"Your neighbor didn't get a good enough look at the deliveryman to definitely ID him as Kinder, but we're going to find him – and Erica too. I'm bringing in the FBI."

Jack swallowed hard and nodded. The idea of involving the FBI was terrifying to him because it meant Erica was really gone, gone far beyond the reaches of Pine Valley to God only knows where, with a crazed psycho like Jonathan Kinder holding her captive. On the other hand, if it brought her home faster…

"How soon can they be briefed on Erica's case?" he asked hoarsely.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

"I see you're awake."

Erica turned her head in the direction of the voice. Jonathan Kinder entered the room carrying a tray, which he placed on the table before turning to her.

"What was in that syringe?" Erica asked, almost afraid of his response.

"Just one of my special concoctions. You see this door doesn't have a lock on it, and I didn't have time to replace it before I brought you here. I had quite a lot of preparations to handle, and there just wasn't time for everything. Still, I'm quite pleased with how it's all come together so far." His voice was smooth and abnormally pleasant, given the circumstances.

"I'm handcuffed to the bed. I can't even sit up. There's no reason to drug me," she spit out. She'd worked so very, very hard to stay sober, especially after her battle with alcoholism in the aftermath of Miranda's 'death.' Every day was a challenge for her, and he was ruining it, all of it. She'd spent more of the past 24 hours under the influence of some hideous combination of drugs than she had sober.

He smiled that same cold smile at her and sat down on the edge of the bed. She fought back a shudder and tried to shift away from him. "I find that you're easier to handle when you're, ah, under the influence, so to speak. Besides, it brings back such fond memories for me."

"You can't possibly think you're going to get away with this, that you can just keep me locked up here in a cabin," Erica insisted.

He trailed a few fingers over her bare leg, ignoring the way she attempted to move away from him.

"Well, this cabin is just a temporary stopping place for us," he explained.

"For how long?" she asked.

He shrugged. "I'm not sure yet. Not too long. Probably just until my beard grows in enough to change my appearance, and then we'll leave."

"Where are we?" Erica asked, her voice barely a whisper. She wanted him to keep talking. Maybe if kept talking he'd take his hand off of her leg. Maybe she could get some useful information from him.

He smiled again and stood up. She watched as he moved the table to the side of the bed. She could see the tray now and she realized with relief that he'd finally brought her food and water. It had been such a long time since she'd last eaten.

"We're in New Hampshire. My parents have had this little place for years. My father originally used it for long fishing weekends, but I found it much more useful as a romantic hideaway and party location when I was in medical school," he said.

New Hampshire. Her heart sunk. She was farther from home than she'd initially thought.

"You must be hungry. I'm going to release your right hand so you can sit up and eat, but if you misbehave, the food leaves the room with me."

Erica nodded and sighed in relief when her wrist was free. She was still cuffed to the bed, but at least she could sit up. She immediately brought her hand to her face, wincing as her fingers felt the swollen and undoubtedly bruised skin. The whole side of her face still ached.

"You're bruised, but your face will heal," he said flatly. "Your beauty is one of the things that first attracted me to you, Erica. I wouldn't permanently damage it."

"You hit me," she said in disgust.

"You tried to escape. You'll find, Erica, that if you behave, our life can be quite pleasant. If you don't, well, there are always consequences."

She didn't want to think about his consequences or the way he said, "our life." She looked down at the tray, wondering if it was safe to eat. Her stomach rumbled in response.

He seemed to sense what she was thinking. "It's perfectly safe to eat. You haven't given me a reason to drug your food."

He pulled up the chair and sat down at the opposite side of the table and watched as she ate. It was uncomfortable, him staring at her like that, but she was hungry enough that she didn't argue about it.

After a few minutes of awkward silence, he finally spoke. "So Dimitri is out of the picture. After all of your protests of 'Dimitri is the love of my life, I'll never love another man' you two were history, what, a year later? Two? How pathetic."

Erica gave him a withering glare and was supremely annoyed by the way he laughed in response.

"You can get tabloids even in prison, you know. And then you moved on to Jackson Montgomery your ever-faithful lapdog and back up man, and that worthless FBI agent Chris Stamp, oh and of course my personal favorite, my own former med school colleague, the illustrious Dr. David Hayward. So much for true, ever-lasting love," he said with a smirk.

The fork slipped out of Erica's hand at his words, and she stared at him in shock. "David? You know David?" she asked in a stunned voice.

He grinned at her. "I take it he didn't tell you. He was a year behind me in med school at Columbia. We ran in some of the same social circles, although I wouldn't call us good friends. Not a bad guy. I can appreciate his drive, his creativity, his questionable medical ethics. And of course, I can appreciate his taste in women."

Erica didn't know how to respond to that.

"What a waste, all of it," he said, narrowing his eyes at his prisoner. "I've desired you this entire time, and if you hadn't been so difficult, we could have been so happy together. But that's all past. The future awaits us, Erica. We're going to be together forever."


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

David rubbed his eyes and glared at the screen on his laptop as he sipped a cup of very strong coffee. He had tossed and turned all night, his thoughts continually drifting back to Erica and what had happened to her. It bothered him tremendously that he was this worked up over her kidnapping. He'd rather die than admit it, particularly given the war she'd declared against him following Miranda's safe return to Bianca, but a part of him still cared about Erica.

She'd never return any positive emotion toward him, he knew that. She was too angry over what he'd done, and she'd never get over it. He knew her too well to expect anything else. She'd married Jackson Montgomery and settled into a seemingly domestic existence. He didn't see that lasting – nothing ever did with Erica – but what the hell, it was her life. If marriage to Jack was what she wanted, he didn't begrudge her happiness. She deserved to be happy. She didn't deserve this, not after everything she'd been through with Bianca and Kendall and the whole mess with Michael Cambias.

He searched through the latest media updates on Erica's disappearance. The news was reporting that the FBI was now involved. That was good, he thought. Those clowns at PVPD would inevitably screw up the investigation if left to their own devices.

David had been about to walk away from the computer and get back to work when he saw a breaking news bulletin: the police were searching for recently-released convict and former doctor Jonathan Kinder, who was wanted for questioning in connection with the kidnapping of television personality Erica Kane.

He sat back down in his chair in shock. Kinder was out of prison? When the hell had that happened? This was bad. This was very, very bad.

He knew all about Erica's history with Jonathan Kinder. She'd detailed her struggle with her addiction to painkillers and the role Kinder had played in it her book "Erica Kane: Beyond the Pain." He'd read it when they were first dating, and he'd been shocked to see Kinder's name pop up in Erica's book. While he'd been disgusted to read about the doctor's misdeeds, he hadn't been all that surprised either.

He'd first met Jonathan Kinder in medical school at Columbia University. David had instantly taken a dislike to Kinder, but thanks to sharing the same group of mutual friends, they'd ended up spending a lot more time around each other than David would have liked. He hadn't trusted Jonathan. He couldn't exactly put his finger on why, but he'd felt there was something sinister about the man even then. He'd made a conscious decision not to mention to Erica that he'd known Kinder. Kinder was locked up in prison for the long-term, and telling her seemed like a pointless thing to do that would only dredge up bad memories and cause her more pain.

Now, as David read through the latest updates on the case and on the surprising news that Jonathan Kinder was out of jail and missing as well, he thought back to everything he'd read in Erica's books, everything she'd told him about her drug addiction, and everything he could remember about the time he'd spent around Jonathan Kinder.

The man had been obsessed with Erica, and if he'd taken her… David's blood ran cold at the thought. He scoffed at the media reports that the Department of Corrections had considered Kinder a model prisoner. The DOC was obviously as clueless as the PVPD. Kinder was cunning, and he was a planner. David was willing to bet that the man hadn't taken Erica on a whim. He'd planned this, and he'd probably been planning it for quite some time, which meant that he likely wasn't hiding in some abandoned foreclosed house on the outskirts of town. He likely had a destination in mind, somewhere far from Pine Valley.

David leaned back in his chair. If he were Jonathan Kinder, where would he take Erica? How would he hide her from the inevitable media frenzy her disappearance would create? David pondered it for a while. Someplace outside of the United States seemed likely, but Kinder couldn't just walk into an international airport with Erica Kane thrown over his shoulder, kicking and screaming. No, Kinder would drug her first before he took his chances in public, David thought with a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. If he had to drug her, then he was probably holed up somewhere with her, biding his time, David thought. Someplace quiet, someplace private.

"Wait…" he whispered as he sat up suddenly. "Would he really…?"

It was a long-shot, sure, but he thought he might just know where Jonathan Kinder had gone. He grabbed his coat and ran for the door.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

David left the hospital and drove straight to the Pine Valley Police Department. He groaned inwardly when he walked into the station and saw Jackson Montgomery. Of course Montgomery would be here. His wife was missing, after all, but God, David didn't want to have to deal with him.

"What the hell are you doing here, Hayward?" Jack asked glaring at the man he'd long considered an enemy.

David narrowed his eyes at the lawyer. He disliked Erica's husband, but she loved him, and judging by his appearance, he was miserable without her. Jack looked like he hadn't slept in days.

"I need to see Derek Frye," David said, looking past Jack for the police chief.

"He's busy trying to find my wife," Jack said flatly, wishing David would leave.

"Yeah, I know that. That's why I'm here"

Jack's head shot up. "What do you know about this?"

"None of your business, Montgomery. I'm not here to talk to you, I'm here to talk to Derek," David said, growing impatient with Erica's husband.

Jack grabbed David's shirt, pulling the doctor toward him. "WHAT do you know about Erica's kidnapping?" he growled.

David was about to swing a punch at Jack's face when Derek and another officer rushed over, separating the two men.

"Let's take this into my office. Both of you. Now," he said in a low voice that left no room for argument.

"Hayward, what's this all about?" Derek asked, once the door to his office was closed.

"Who is she?" David asked, gesturing to the non-descript woman in the corner.

"Agent Joan Foster, FBI. I'm from the Philadelphia office," she said.

David nodded at her. "Good. Hopefully you can keep these guys from screwing this up."

Derek gritted his teeth in exasperation at the doctor. He hated Hayward with a passion, and he wished he'd just get to the point already.

"Hayward, why are you here?" Derek asked

David jammed his hands in his pockets. "Jonathan Kinder has Erica, doesn't he?"

"We can't comment on the on-going investigation, but we are looking to bring him in for questioning," Derek said.

"Questioning. Right. I seem to recall how incredibly effective your questioning was in solving the Michael Cambias murder," David said sarcastically.

"If you have a point, please get to it now before I have you escorted out," Derek said. "Or did you come to confess?"

"I have nothing to confess. I've done nothing wrong, not that I'd expect you to believe it," David retorted. "But if you think Jonathan Kinder has Erica, then I suggest you get up to New Hampshire before he takes her out of the country."

There was silence in the room as they all stared at David.

"What's in New Hampshire?" the FBI agent finally asked.

"Kinder has a cabin up there, on Lake Winnipesaukee," he said calmly.

"How do you know that?" Derek asked, suspicion clear in his voice.

"Because I've been there," David replied.

It took a few seconds for his words to sink in, but then Jack lunged for David, yelling, "What did you do to Erica?"

Derek and Agent Foster both moved to pull Jack off of David before punches were thrown.

"Jack, calm down!" Derek said, pushing his friend and colleague back.

"I will not calm down, not when my wife is being held hostage by a madman!" Jack said angrily.

"Dr. Hayward, how do you know Dr. Kinder?" Joan asked when it was clear a fistfight was at least temporarily prevented.

David glared at Jack. "We were in medical school together at Columbia University. He was a year ahead of me. We had some mutual friends."

Jack shook his head in disgust. "I should have known. You and Kinder really are two of a kind. Of course you'd know each other."

"I'm under no obligation to be here," David said to Derek and Joan. "I'm trying to pass along pertinent information about a serious crime, and I'd appreciate it if one of you would muzzle Montgomery or kick him out of here."

"I'm not going anywhere, Hayward. This is my WIFE we're talking about!" Jack said furiously.

"Yes, it is, and if you love her, you'll shut the hell up and let me finish," David snapped. He hated this. He hated the idea of coming to Derek Frye and Jackson Montgomery and offering his help, knowing how much they despised him, hell, how they considered him a suspect! Still, he wasn't a complete bastard – if his suspicions about Kinder were right, and that information got Erica home sooner, then he could put up with the PVPD.

"This cabin, you said you'd been there?" Joan broke in.

"Yes," David said. "It's not anything fancy, or at least it wasn't at the time, but Kinder used to take people up there for long weekends. It was sort of a party retreat – swim, drink beer, take a break from med school, enjoy the outdoors. There's not a lot up there, mostly just small towns that are tourist traps in the summer. I went there once with a group of friends, and I know he took women there." There was an edge to his voice that both Derek and Joan noticed.

"He took women there?" Joan asked.

David hesitated for a moment. "There was a girl, a first year medical student. She was fresh in from a small town in the Midwest. Naïve, innocent, conservative, the whole nine yards. They were dating, casually according to her, but he seemed more serious about it. He took her there for the weekend. I don't know exactly what happened while they were there, but she wasn't the same when they came back."

"How so?" Joan asked.

"She was withdrawn, overly emotional. I wasn't the only one in our circle of friends who worried about her. We all encouraged her to go to the police if he'd done anything to hurt her, but she wouldn't confirm anything. She dropped out of med school not long after, and I never saw her again." David said quietly.

David paused for a moment. "Derek, I'm sure you're aware of what Jonathan Kinder did to Skye Chandler, and she was his wife. If he has Erica…"

Jack had a tortured expression on his face, while Chief Frye and the FBI agent took the news in silently.

"What makes you so sure he'd take Erica to this alleged cabin?" Derek asked.

David sighed in exasperation. He hated when other people failed to grasp the obvious. "It's in a secluded area, one with which he's very familiar. At this time of year, there likely aren't a lot of people around so there's little risk anyone would see him with Erica. It's only about a four hour drive from there to Montreal where he'd be able to get a flight anywhere in the world."

"Where would he go from Montreal?" Derek asked.

David rolled his eyes. "I don't know. Eastern Europe? South America? Central America? Somewhere Erica wouldn't be easily recognizable. You're the investigators. You figure it out."

Joan looked up from her notes. "Dr. Hayward, a search of Jonathan Kinder's prior addresses and property owned didn't turn up anything in New Hampshire."

"Of course it didn't, because he's lying," Jack said firmly.

"I'm pretty sure it was owned by his parents. If one or both of them is still alive, the property is likely in their names," David replied.

"You don't have an alibi for the morning Erica was kidnapped," Jack said, "And you've just admitted to knowing Jonathan Kinder. How do we know you aren't working together? That this isn't some sort of wild goose chase you're sending us on to help him escape with my wife?"

David's jaw hardened. God, Montgomery could be such a jerk. He'd never understand what Erica saw in him.

"If I were working with Jonathan Kinder, I wouldn't be stupid enough to tell you exactly where to look for her. Besides, if I wanted Erica, I wouldn't need to kidnap her to have her," he snapped before he could stop himself.

Jack's fist connected with David's face seconds later.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

After she ate, Jonathan offered to un-cuff Erica's other hand so she could take a shower. She eyed him suspiciously but didn't respond. A long hot shower sounded heavenly, but she had no intention of undressing anywhere near him.

When she didn't respond, Jonathan took the tray from the room, returning a few minutes later with a duffel bag. "I took the liberty of grabbing a few of your things before we left Pine Valley," he said, as he placed the bag on the table in front of her. "I was aiming for something fairly innocuous that would help you blend in when we leave here, but you don't have much in your wardrobe that fits that description," he said dryly.

She stared at the bag but said nothing. She was terrified of provoking his anger, afraid that one wrong move would trigger a fit of rage that would end with him hitting her again or worse, but at the same time, she couldn't bring herself to beg or plead with him. She didn't want to be a victim, his or anyone else's.

"Now would be the appropriate time to express some gratitude, Erica," he said in an annoyed voice. "I risked a great deal by taking the time to pack a few changes of clothes for you. If you don't want your clothes, I'm fine with removing that dress and leaving you to shiver naked in here until we leave."

Her eyes flashed at him in anger, and she struggled to keep her voice monotonous.

"Thank you."

"Much better," he said smoothly. "I don't want to have to deny you any basic needs: food, water, shelter, clothing, and of course indoor plumbing. Now, I'm sure you'd like to use the bathroom, and I'm sure you'll feel better after you've had a shower."

A short time later, she stood under a stream of hot water, trying to avoid bearing weight on her injured ankle as she sobbed. She desperately hoped he couldn't hear her crying over the shower – she didn't want to give him the satisfaction of knowing she was so upset.

She'd hoped that his offer of a shower would provide an opportunity to escape, but her hopes had been almost instantly dashed. He'd un-cuffed her from the bed, escorted her into the tiny bathroom and handed her a change of clothes before informing her that she had 30 minutes of privacy to shower and change. If she wasn't finished in her allotted time, he was coming in there to get her, and oh yes, he'd be sitting right outside the bathroom door the entire time. She'd been tempted to open the bathroom door a crack, just to see if he really was sitting there, but she didn't want to give him a reason to come in to the bathroom. Taking off her clothes was distasteful enough with him on the other side of the closed door.

The hot water did make her feel slightly better, loosening sore muscles and relieving some of the ache she felt from being chained to the bed. It did not, however, improve her attitude or her outlook. She'd lost out on her chance to escape when she first awoke at the cabin, and he apparently wasn't going to give her much of a chance to get away, at least not while they were here.

Once she got past the initial outburst of tears, she wiped at her eyes and tried to focus. Her hands shook as she scrubbed her hair and skin with the drugstore toiletries he'd purchased, wrinkling her nose in distaste at the artificial fragrance. It would do though, any soap was better than none - anything to try to wash away the feel of him hitting her across the face, of his hand around her throat.

"Focus," she whispered to herself. "You have to focus."

He'd said they were only going to be here for a few days, that they'd be going elsewhere. She knew they couldn't be that far from the Canadian border. That had to be their next stop, if not their ultimate destination. Why else would he bring her all the way up to New Hampshire in the dead of winter?

He had to have driven her here, and if they were going to Canada, she was certain they'd be going by automobile. He wouldn't take a chance with her on a plane. She touched the spot on her upper arm where he'd jabbed her with a needle the night before and grimaced. He'd likely drug her as soon as he was ready to leave the cabin.

She wondered how much longer they'd stay here. She guessed probably not more than a few days. She wondered if that was long enough for her to earn his trust so that he'd be willing to leave her conscious and in control of her faculties for the next leg of the trip. Then again, it was hard not to feel nauseated at just the memory of his hand on her bare leg. As much as she feared losing her sobriety and falling prey again to his chemical cocktails, the thought of being fully conscious and aware when he inevitably raped her was downright terrifying.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

David cursed as he revved the black SUV down the interstate. He'd taken off in search of Erica and Jonathan the moment he left the police station. "Goddamn inept PVPD," he blew out in frustration. After Jack had punched him in the face, he'd given up. Let the PVPD twist in the wind. He would find Erica himself.

Lord only knew what hateful commentary Montgomery and Frye were spewing for the FBI now. He shook his head in annoyance. He wondered sometimes why he even bothered with that damn town. He hoped he'd at least gotten through to that FBI agent. Surely she'd be responsible enough to dot her i's and cross her t's and actually investigate the cabin in New Hampshire.

He'd stopped off at his own home on the way out of town to throw some things in a bag and look up the number for the county records office in New Hampshire. He'd been able to smooth talk a county employee into confirming that Kinder's mother did still own a cabin on the lake. Armed with the address, he ran for the car and was on the road in seconds. According to his GPS, he'd be there in about seven hours. He hoped that was long enough to come up with a plan for what he'd do if he actually found Erica there with Jonathan Kinder.

At the Pine Valley police station, Jackson Montgomery raged over David Hayward's insistence that Jonathan Kinder had to have taken Erica north to some rural cabin.

"David Hayward is a LIAR! You know this Derek! You KNOW he can't be trusted!"

"What makes you so certain?" Agent Foster asked as she took copious notes on their conversation.

Jack shook his head incredulously. "Where do I start? The man let my wife and her daughter – my niece – believe that her baby was DEAD when he knew good and well that baby girl was alive and being raised by HIS daughter. He drugged a boatload of people, including myself and my niece, with an experimental and potentially dangerous drug. I'm sure you've heard of his late mother, Vanessa Bennett, also known as the drug lord Proteus."

Agent Foster looked stunned by this revelation. "THE Proteus? That was Dr. Hayward's mother?"

"One and the same," Derek said. "I hate to say it, but Jack is right – David Hayward is trouble. Don't even get me started on the mess with Maria Santos-Gray. It's a failure of the justice system that this man has avoided prison thus far."

"But this information about the cabin – this is the first real lead we've had," she pointed out.

"Kinder has been in jail for a decade. How would he even know if that cabin – if it even exists – is habitable? Besides, he's supposed to have been regularly meeting with a parole office. He wouldn't be able to make repeated trips to New Hampshire to set up a cabin," Jack argued. "David Hayward stood here in this office and said that he KNEW Jonathan Kinder, that they were friends. His coming here with this news about a supposed cabin could all be an elaborate misdirection to give his buddy Jonathan time to skip the country with my wife!"

Agent Foster pondered the situation. "I'll make some calls check into the cabin. If Kinder's family really owns property up there, it should be easy enough to find out. If the cabin exists, then it's just a matter of sending a few agents of our agents from the FBI's Boston office to check it out. I'll meet them up there."

"NO!" Jack said firmly. "I don't want manpower taken away from this investigation to go on some wild goose chase set up by David Hayward! I want my wife found, before that psychotic criminal can hurt her!"

"Jack, that's what we all want: Erica home safe where she belongs. You know as well as I do that police procedure is to check out every reasonable lead, and right now, we have tips pouring in like crazy," Derek said, trying to soothe his friend.

"And you know as well as I do, Derek, that most tips in cases like these are made by complete cranks," Jack reminded him.

"That's true, but as disagreeable as Hayward may be, 'crank' isn't a term I'd use to describe him," Derek admitted.

Jack rubbed his temples in frustration. He knew they had to investigate every tip, every lead and see where it went, but it upset him to no end that valuable time would be wasted on what at best could be a waste of time and at worst a deliberate misdirection. Hayward had caused enough problems for his family.

"Okay. You have to check it out. But you don't have to waste time on it now. Check out the other leads first. Anything promising," Jack said to Derek. "Please. Do this for me, and for Erica. Don't let David Hayward stymie this investigation."


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

After Erica showered and dressed, Jonathan handcuffed her left wrist to the bed again and left her there. She wasn't sure how long she was alone before he came back to her room. The lack of a clock or a window was incredibly disorienting – she wasn't entirely sure anymore if it was even day or night.

"Don't you feel better, now that you've showered and put on clean clothes?" he asked with a slight smile as he sat down in the chair.

"I'd feel better if I were at home with my family," she spit back before she could stop herself.

He narrowed his eyes at her. "From now on Erica, I AM your family. It's just the two of us, and we're going to be very happy together."

She stared at him in shock. He really was insane!

"I'll never be happy with you. Never," she said with quiet but steely determination.

He stood up abruptly and for a moment she feared he'd hit her again. Then she saw the syringe in his hand.

"In time, you'll change your tune. You don't really have a choice. You'll either come to love me and be happy with me, or I can keep you medicated. But either way, I'll get what I want." he said with a sadistic smile.

She shrunk back against the headboard. "Please don't drug me. Jonathan, you know what I went through before, you know about my experience at the Betty Ford Center. Please don't undo everything I've worked so hard for." She didn't want to beg, and she hated him with a fiery passion for reducing her to this, but God she didn't want to be lost in a drug-induced stupor. She didn't want to return home to her family in need of detox and rehab again.

He tilted his head and looked at her for a moment as if he was considering her words.

"I'm handcuffed. I can't go anywhere, and you've made it clear that no one can hear me scream and that you're going to be right here even when I have to use the bathroom. There's no reason to drug me," she continued, grasping for something, anything she could say to keep that syringe away from her. "Besides, if I'm unconscious, I'm not very good company for you."

His expression seemed to soften for a moment. "That's true. I do prefer you awake and able to converse with me. It's been so long since we've been able to enjoy each other's company."

He sat back down in the chair. "So then, let's talk."

She breathed a sigh of relief.

"How much longer are we going to stay here?" she asked when she realized he seemed to want her to start the conversation.

He stroked the beard that was growing in on his face. "I don't know. A few more days at the most. I never planned for us to stay here long term."

"Where are we going?"

He eyed her suspiciously.

She sighed in exasperation. "Obviously there's no one for me to tell. I just want to know what to expect. I hate surprises."

He considered her words for a moment. "Canada," he finally said.

"Is that where we're staying?"

"No."

"Where are we going after that?" she asked.

"South America, and that's all I'm willing to tell you for now," he said firmly.

Erica took that in. She'd been right about Canada. The idea of going somewhere in South America worried her. They'd have to fly, and taking a plane would imply that he had access to money and to passports of some kind.

"How long have you been planning this?"

He scoffed. "Erica, darling, I've had nothing but time. A decade sitting in jail with nothing to do but plan."

"What about passports? We can't just get on an international flight," she said, knowing that her own passport had been locked away in the safe at her house.

"Please. Do you really think I'd neglect something that important," he said, seemingly disappointed by her lack of faith in his attention to detail. "Prison is full of interesting people, Erica, many of whom have very, shall we say, 'useful' talents and connections. And like I said, I've had plenty of time to put this together."

Her heart sank at this news. He really had been planning this for a long time if he'd managed to get his hands on false passports.

"Why me?" she asked after a long moment of silence.

"Why not? Erica, I've adored you from the moment you first came to my office all of those years ago. I tried to win your heart, but Dimitri kept getting in the way. I tried to help you, to stand by you when your addiction got out of control and you needed treatment."

"An addiction YOU made worse," she said in disgust. Memories came flooding back to her: all of the times Dimitri tried to help her, to reach her when she was lost in a haze of painkillers, and she'd turned to Jonathan Kinder for help instead. She'd been so in need of the next hit that she'd thought only of the relief she'd feel when she got the next pill or the next injection. She couldn't blame Jonathan for the addiction itself - that had begun on its own with the serious injury to her back – but she could and forever would blame him for exacerbating an already dangerous problem, for using the drugs to try to keep her away from her husband, and for extending the months and months she spent in a descending spiral of misery from all of the drugs.

"Now, that's not any way to talk. I helped you, and we both know it. I even took the rap for you when you crashed into your sister-in-law while under the influence," he reminded her.

She looked away. She didn't like to be reminded of the person she'd been while addicted to painkillers or the many mistakes that she'd made, starting with ever trusting one Dr. Jonathan Kinder.

"I invested a serious amount of time and effort into you, and I had every intention of spending the rest of my life with you. Years apart haven't changed that," he said.

"It doesn't matter how long you keep me a prisoner. I'll never love you," she said.

He smiled at her as if he was amused by her words.

"We'll see about that."


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

Jonathan stood up then and moved toward her, leaving the syringe on the table.

"How's your ankle?" he asked casually.

When she didn't respond, he continued, "You were limping in the kitchen, and again when you went into the bathroom."

Erica glared at him. He'd punched her and shoved her to the floor and jerked her around by her hair when he'd kidnapped her, and then he'd brutally hit her in the face when she'd tried to escape. Surely he didn't expect her to believe that he now cared about her physical well-being.

"Let me see it," he said as he moved toward the bed.

"NO! Don't touch me," she yelled, holding her free hand up in a feeble attempt to block him as she leaned back, intending to kick him if need be.

"Don't be ridiculous, Erica."

He caught her hand easily and pressed his knee over her legs, leaning his weight on her to pin her to the bed.

"NO! Get off of me!" she screamed in pain as she struggled against him.

In seconds, he had her other hand cuffed to the bed frame again, and he stood over her. She pulled hard at the cuffs in a combination of both anger and fear.

"Was that really necessary?" he asked her in annoyance. He then sat down on the edge of the bed, facing away from her. She fought back a shudder of revulsion as she felt his hands on her leg.

"Don't touch me!" she repeated, trying to pull her leg back from him as she jerked against the handcuffs. He responded by squeezing her injured ankle until she gasped and then cried out in pain.

"Erica," he said calmly as he released his grip on her ankle, "As I told you before, if you behave, I can be very accommodating. If you insist on making everything a struggle, you're going to get hurt. Now be still."

She squeezed her eyes shut and fought back tears as he felt around her ankle.

"It's hard to say for certain without an x-ray, but it doesn't appear broken. It's likely just a sprain. Those heels you wear are dangerous. So easy to trip and fall," he said as he stood up and looked at her again.

"Are you injured anywhere else?"

She opened her eyes and stared at him in shock. Was he kidding?

The entire side of her face ached where he'd hit her, and she knew it was swollen and bruised but she wasn't about to tell him how badly it hurt, especially not if it would result in him touching her.

She shook her head slightly. "I'm fine."

He caught her chin in his hand and forcibly turned her head from him.

"Stop!" she gasped when she felt his fingers probing at her injured cheek. She squeezed her eyes shut and refused to look at him.

"I don't like to hit you Erica," he said a moment later as his hands finally, mercifully left her body. She felt bile rise in her throat at his words. He didn't LIKE to hit her?

When she finally opened her eyes, he was sitting down on the bed facing her. He stared at her for a long time before speaking. "You haven't changed much at all in the last decade. Still just as lovely and just as difficult as ever."

He reached out and took a lock of her hair between his fingers, ignoring the way she flinched. "Well, your hair is longer of course, but that's easily fixed. I'll cut it for you before we leave for Canada. In the meantime, I have work to do, and you should get your rest."

Before she could respond, he shoved the sleeve of her knit dress up her arm, uncapped the syringe and jabbed it into her arm. She tried to protest, she tried to move away from him, from the needle, but before she knew it, the room was spinning. She closed her eyes and tried to choke back a sob.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

David followed the winding back roads out of town and toward the lakeside cabin he'd last visited so many years ago. He'd hoped he could find the cabin before the sun set completely set, but with the shorter winter daylight hours, that wasn't possible. Throughout the drive to New Hampshire, he'd done his best to formulate a plan, all the while debating the best possible course of action.

He'd been tempted to call the police in the town nearest the cabin and ask them to investigate, but he'd ultimately decided against it. The Pine Valley Police Department was bad enough. He shuddered to think of what kind of Barney Fife-esque officer would be sent out alone to check on the cabin, if someone was sent at all. He could just envision a lone inept officer not taking the request seriously and inadvertently scaring Kinder into grabbing Erica and running - or worse. He wasn't willing to take that kind of risk.

His great hope was that the FBI agent he'd met in Pine Valley had passed the information along to her colleagues and someone with decent law enforcement skills had already gotten to the cabin and to Erica. But if they hadn't…

He finally found the driveway to Kinder's cabin. At least one set of tire tracks was visible in the snow. Someone had definitely been to the cabin recently. The driveway was long and winding, and he couldn't quite see the cabin from the road. He didn't want to turn his SUV into the driveway and give away his presence - he needed the element of surprise to work in his favor.

David pulled the SUV just off the road where it was partially concealed by the boughs of a large pine tree. Given the minimal tracks through the snow, it seemed unlikely that there'd be much traffic. He sat quietly in the vehicle and bided his time. Waiting until the middle of the night when he could likely catch Kinder asleep seemed like the best plan, the safest plan, but he didn't want to make Erica wait that long. Kinder was crazy and sadistic, and David didn't want to think what the man could be doing to Erica.

Snow began to fall as he waited in the dark in his vehicle. He gripped his cell phone multiple times as he debated calling for help. The nearby small towns probably didn't have much in the way of a police force. The nearest FBI office was likely Boston. He should call them now. David's fingers brushed over the phone's keypad as he debated his options again. He'd have to convince the FBI this was an emergency to get them to take it seriously, and they'd likely call the local police, and he was right back where he started.

He finally reached the point where he could no longer sit idly in the car. Erica had waited long enough, and surely by now the cabin's inhabitants were likely winding down for the night. He climbed out of the SUV, pulling his lightweight coat around him more tightly. He wished he'd thought to bring a warmer coat, but he'd been too worried about Erica to think about such practical matters. He made sure he had his cell phone, a small flashlight and the Glock 30SF handgun he normally kept locked away in his own home. He wouldn't put it past someone like Kinder to have a weapon on him. At least this way they'd both be armed.

With that, he slipped the SUV keys into his pocket and began his approach to the cabin. He stayed off the driveway, moving quietly through the trees that flanked the narrow drive. It was a slow trek, and his feet were freezing in the snow, even in boots. He prayed that his hunch was right, that Erica really was being held here. He hoped that Kinder would already be asleep. He hoped that Erica would be conscious and uninjured. He hoped that he'd be able to slip in and out of the cabin without being detected. He hoped Erica was wearing something other than the flimsy sleeveless dresses she tended to favor so she wouldn't freeze on the way back to the car. He figured he was probably out of luck on that last count.

When he at last got a clear view of the cabin, David's heart pounded as he realized that someone was indeed there. A plain white cargo van was parked in front of the house, a light shone through the window, and a thin trail of smoke billowed from the chimney.

David crouched behind a large tree and watched and waited. At last he saw Jonathan Kinder walk past the window, carrying a tray of some kind. The former doctor was apparently growing a beard, and he looked older, but he was still recognizable to David. David watched the man's movements around the cabin, trying to determine where Erica was being held.

After a short while, Kinder moved out of David's line of vision. He cursed under his breath and crept closer to the cabin, moving carefully with his gun drawn.

Inside the cabin, Erica lay handcuffed to the bed again, fighting to stay calm. Kinder had released her to use the bathroom and to eat, but she couldn't muster much of an appetite. He considered her lack of interest in food to be a personal affront to the efforts he'd made and had gotten angry with her before taking the tray and storming out of the room.

Eventually he came back to her room and stared down at her with a cold look in his steely gray eyes that made Erica shiver.

"I grow tired of your defiance," he said in a hard voice as he sat down on the edge of the bed. "I've gone to a tremendous amount of effort for us to be together, and I don't appreciate the constant rejection."

He looked over at the navy blanket Erica had wrapped around herself when he'd given her the freedom to sit up and eat. He pulled it away from her in one hard jerk, smiling sadistically at the way she gasped and tried to sit up.

He tossed the blanket on the floor before continuing. "I had planned to wait until we were settled in our new home in South America, but given your behavior since we've arrived here, I think perhaps waiting is overrated. You're like a wild horse in need of breaking. Besides, ten years is a long time, and you're just too difficult to resist."

His hand on her thigh made his intentions horrifyingly clear.

David peered cautiously into the window, searching for any sign of Jonathan or Erica. Seeing none, he figured that the man must have Erica locked away in one of the two bedrooms. The window was large enough and low enough to the ground that he could break it and climb through if need be, but he hoped he'd be able to simply go through the door. Breaking the window would surely attract unwanted attention.

He slipped undetected past the window toward the front door. His heart pounded in his ears as he reached out and grabbed the door knob. To his immense relief, the knob turned easily. He pushed it open just slightly, pausing to listen for any movement or sound.

No one had come storming toward the door, so he figured that was a good sign. In seconds he could be inside the cabin and still have the element of surprise working in his favor.

Then he heard Erica scream.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

David burst through the front door of the cabin, following the sounds of Erica's screams. He was tempted to call out to her, to give her some reassurance that help was on the way, that she wasn't alone, but he didn't want Kinder to know he was there.

David shoved open the door to bedroom. Kinder was there, his back to the door as he bent over a struggling, screaming Erica. Bile rose up in his throat at the scene before him. He had stayed in the car, waiting for it to get dark. He cursed himself for that now. He should have come right away. He should have driven the damn SUV all the way to the front door and beaten the door in to get to Erica.

He felt like he was having an out of body experience as he ran for the bed, grabbed Kinder by the back of the neck and shoved him face first into the nearest wall, toppling a table and chair in the process. He wanted to punch him, kick him, and beat him into a bloody pulp for what he was doing to Erica, but getting to her needed to be his first priority. He brought the butt of his gun down hard on Kinder's head, knocking him unconscious. He blew out an expletive as he watched his former colleague crumple to the floor.

Erica gasped for breath in between sobs as she tried to process what had just happened. Jonathan was on top of her, angry, hateful, and sadistic. He'd torn open the front of her knit dress, ripped the lace of her bra. He was touching her, hurting her. She'd kicked her legs at him with everything she had in her until he'd straddled her thighs, pinning her to the bed. She'd pulled against the handcuffs, trying desperately to free her hands. Her wrists and hands were in agonizing pain, but she couldn't stop. She wouldn't. She wouldn't just lie there and let him rape her. She had to fight. She WOULD fight. She wouldn't just submit and accept her hideous, horrifying fate. No, this couldn't happen to her again. Not again.

And then… and then he was gone. Something, some merciful force had pulled him off of her and slammed him into the wall.

David slipped his gun into the waistband of his jeans and rushed to Erica. Fury boiled inside of him at the sight of her, handcuffed to the bed, half-dressed, and sobbing. Her eyes were squeezed tightly closed and tears stained her bruised face. He leaned in and whispered her name.

Erica felt someone touch her again, but this was a feather-light gentle fingertip against her cheek. She heard a familiar voice call her name. Her eyes fluttered open and the stared up at the man, the wonderful, merciful man who had put an end to the violent attack.

"David?" she breathed, her eyes widening in surprise.

He nodded, trying to control his raging emotions. "It's okay. You're going to be okay now. I'm going to get you out of here."

She nodded and tried to still her sobs.

He glanced around the room. "Do you know where the keys to the handcuffs are?"

She sniffled and drew in a shaky breath. "In… his… pocket," she gasped, her voice wavering with each word.

David ran his fingers through his hair and went about the distasteful job of searching Kinder's pants pockets. Moments later he fished out a small key. He straightened up and looked down in disgust at Kinder's unconscious form. He couldn't help himself – he threw in a sharp kick to the ribs. He figured the bastard deserved at least that.

David leaned over her and tried to smile reassuringly at Erica while he uncuffed her hands and helped her sit up. He gasped at her in horror when he finally had her freed from the bed.

"My God, Erica – your wrists!" Both of her wrists and portions of her hands were bruised, red, raw and even bleeding in places. He didn't want to think about how terrified she must have been or how desperate she was to escape to do that to herself.

She pulled her hands subconsciously away from his, ducked her head and brought her arms in toward her chest, trying to cover herself with what was left of her dress.

He immediately pulled her into an embrace, wrapping his arms gently around her. He knew she hated him, he knew she'd never forgive him for what he'd done to Bianca and Miranda, and he knew she probably preferred to be rescued by almost anyone else. But in that moment, he was just so damn thankful that she was alive, he didn't care about anything else.

Erica was still in disbelief that David – David of all people – had burst into this hell on earth and stopped Jonathan Kinder. For days she'd been subjected to mental and physical abuse, and she'd just come very close to being raped again, an act of violence she wasn't sure she could mentally survive again without losing her sanity. But David had saved her. His arms were around her, and his touch and his voice were soothing and soft and gentle. Sobs ripped through her body, and she cried in anger, in pain, in fear, in relief.

After a few minutes, she'd calmed down enough to pull back from the embrace. She gazed up at David in confusion. "How did you know…?"

"Where to find you?" he finished for her. "It's a long story, and I'll tell you about it later. But for now, I think we need to get you to a hospital."

Before she could say another word, he scooped her up in his arms and carried her out of the bedroom, out of her prison.


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20

David stopped for a moment when they entered the cabin's main room. He'd parked his SUV just off the road, far from the cabin. There was no way he could make her walk that far through the snow in bare feet and essentially half a dress.

"Erica?" he asked. "I hate to ask this, but um, do you have any clothes that aren't torn up? A coat I can put on over your dress? Shoes? Anything?"

She looked up from his shoulder and sniffled. "There's a duffel bag. He said he took some of my clothes."

David nodded toward a bag sitting by the stone fireplace. "Is that it?"

He sat her down carefully on the sofa and grabbed the bag. He pulled out a sweater, a pair of jeans, and the only shoes he could find – heels of course – and handed them to Erica.

"Can you put these on, or do you need help?"

She stared up at him, her eyes wide and uncomprehending. David ran his fingers impatiently through his hair as he explained the situation.

She looked down at the clothes and then up at him again. He wanted her to undress? He couldn't possibly be serious.

"Okay, let's do it this way," David said quietly. "You don't need to undress. I just don't want you to freeze to death."

He took the long v-neck sweater and pulled it over Erica's head, gently pushing her arms through the sleeves.

He slid the jeans on over her feet and up to her knees. "Can you get them on the rest of the way by yourself?" he asked.

She nodded, so he moved toward the front door and turned his back to give her some privacy. Her hands ached, and sliding the jeans up over her hips and fastening them was a lot harder than she thought it would be.

She finally managed to get the jeans and shoes on, but she had to bite her lip hard to hold back a cry of pain as she forced her foot into the high-heeled shoe. She was about to tell David that he could turn around, that she was ready to leave when she felt someone grab her hair from behind.

David whirled around when he heard a painful cry come from Erica. Standing behind her was a now-conscious Jonathan Kinder. He had one hand in Erica's hair, holding onto her with a vise-like grip, and in the other hand, he held a syringe with the needle pressed against Erica's throat.

David froze. How had Kinder had regained consciousness so quickly?

"Well, isn't this a surprise. My illustrious former colleague, the infamous Dr. David Hayward," Kinder said in a malicious voice. "I suppose I should have known that you of all people would be the one to show up here."

David held up his hands in what he hoped was a calming gesture. "Jonathan, don't hurt her."

Kinder looked down at Erica. "Darling, would you care to explain to me why you were willing to deny me your love and affection, why you accused me of such horrible misdeeds, and yet you took up with HIM?"

Erica's eyes locked with David's, and he could see the look of terror on her face.

Kinder repositioned his hands, moving a hand from her hair to wrap around the front of her body. She recoiled in disgust at the feel of his breath hot against her ear as he spoke, "I mean, I drug a few people, he drugs a few people. I blackmail a few people, he blackmails a few people. What's the difference, right? If you can tolerate his misdeeds, then there's really no reason why you and I can't be happy together."

He trailed the tip of the needle along her throat. She sucked in a shaky breath and closed her eyes. "Please, don't drug me. Please. It's… it's not necessary," she whispered. Oh God she hated him, she hated him for what he'd done to her, what he wanted to do to her. She hated him for the needle pressed against her throat, pricking at her skin, and she hated him for reducing her to this, to begging.

"Oh darling, I think it is. You tried to escape, you fought me, and now your lover is here to try to take you away from me," he said as he nuzzled his cheek against her hair.

"David and I aren't lovers," she managed to choke out.

"Mmm… somehow I doubt that. I know David, and playing the role of the great white knight in shining armor was never really his style."

As he watched the scene in front of him, David slowly and carefully slipped his hand into his pocket and reached for his cell phone. His fingers sought out the familiar button keypad and dialed 911. He'd fumbled with the phone while waiting in the SUV earlier, and he had a few bars. It wasn't great reception, but God willing it would be enough for a call to go through. He just prayed someone was willing to listen long enough to know to send help, because this situation was quickly spiraling out of control.


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21

"Jonathan, I know you're angry," David said in a slightly louder than normal voice, hoping he could draw attention away from Erica and speak loudly enough to be heard if anyone had answered the cell phone call. "But you aren't angry with her. You're angry with me. I showed up here and messed up your kidnapping."

Kinder glared at David. "You're right – I am angry with you, but you haven't messed up my plans for Erica. Now - hand over your gun."

David tried to play dumb. "I don't have a gun."

"Don't be stupid, David. You didn't come all the way up here to bust in on a convicted felon and alleged kidnapper without bringing a weapon. Plus I'm sure that wasn't your fist that connected with my head earlier. So unless you want me to take my anger out on Erica, hand it over."

David reluctantly pulled the gun out of the waistband of his pants and held it up. He wanted to shoot the bastard, but he had Erica squarely in front of him, and David wasn't sure if he could hit Kinder without hurting Erica in the process, especially with that needle against her throat.

"Put down the syringe, Kinder," he demanded.

"I don't think so."

"Okay. Can you at least tell me what's in it? Consider it professional curiosity."

Kinder raised an eyebrow at David. "Just one of my special concoctions."

David grasped at straws. If Kinder wanted to kill Erica, he'd have done it already. He'd kept her alive to play out some sick happily ever after fantasy. Surely he didn't intend to kill her now.

"You're a little out of practice," he pointed out. "How do you know it's not going to kill her?"

Erica's eyes widened in fear at David's words, and he felt bad for giving her another reason to be afraid.

"A lower dosage hasn't yet," Kinder said with a slight shrug. "It was very useful in getting her up here to my cabin, and moving forward I believe that cutting the dosage even further may keep her conscious but much easier to handle. After a while even I get tired of listening to her scream."

He smiled sadistically at David. "Then again, as you said, I am a bit out of practice. You'd hate for me to inject all of this into her bloodstream at once, wouldn't you? So put the gun down on the floor and kick it over here to me."

Common sense dictated that he hold onto his weapon, but he didn't dare call Kinder's bluff over what the contents of that syringe could do to Erica. David bent slowly as he placed the gun on the floor and kicked it across the wood floor toward Kinder. He hoped he'd been able to move carefully enough that he didn't disconnect the cell phone.

Kinder moved the syringe to his left hand and attempted to hold onto Erica as he bent to pick up the gun with his right hand. Erica's eyes locked with David's in that moment and she saw the look on his face and understood from his expression that this might be her only chance. She turned her head toward Kinder's left hand and bit down as hard as she could. His hand flexed in response, and the syringe dropped to the floor. She shifted her weight to her left foot, ignoring the pain in her injured ankle, and then she slammed her knee into Kinder's face as he bent to reach for the gun.

He was momentarily stunned by the bite and the blow to the face, but Kinder reacted as quickly as possible. As David ran toward Erica, Kinder reached for the gun, pulled it up and fired.

For David, the scene passed as if in slow motion. He saw Kinder raise the gun, and he tried to move out of the way, but he wasn't fast enough. He felt the sharp searing pain of the bullet as it tore through his left shoulder and knocked him off of his feet.

Erica kicked at Kinder again, and the gun went sliding across the floor as he cursed at her.

"You're going to pay for that!" he snarled at her.

She ignored his threats - she knew David had been hit. He'd come all of this way for her, to try to save her, and he'd been shot because of her. She rushed forward, calling out to David, intending to run toward him when Kinder reached out and grabbed her leg. She fell forward, catching herself on the floor with her injured hands. She yelled at Kinder to let go of her and kicked her legs furiously, trying to break the hold he had on her.

She lay on the floor on her stomach, trying to pull herself forward and fight off Jonathan at the same time. She knew it was likely a hopeless battle and that he'd soon overpower her, but she refused to give up without a fight. She screamed in pain when Kinder's hand caught her injured ankle. He pulled at her, trying to slide her across the floor toward him.

"No!" she ground out, stretching her arms forward, reaching out for anything she could grab to either prevent him from dragging her away or to use as a weapon against him. On the floor, just under the edge of a chair, she saw the gun.

She glanced over her shoulder and realized that Kinder was reaching for something. What the hell was he doing? Oh God, what if he really was going to kill her? What if he'd rather kill her than let David try to leave with her? She looked back at the gun. If she could just move forward a few more inches, she could get her hands on it. The whooshing sound of her heart pounding in her ears blocked out almost everything else. She thought she screamed at him to stop, to let her go, but she couldn't be sure. Everything seemed to move in slow motion. With a strength she didn't know she had, Erica pulled herself forward on the floor until her fingers touched the cold heavy metal of David's gun.

She could feel Jonathan's hands were her as he crawled up the length of her body, pinning her to the floor.

"I am tired of the games and the fighting Erica," Kinder growled at her.

She felt his hands tearing at her sweater and the remnants of her dress underneath it.

"If I have to keep you drugged until you accept the inevitable, so be it. You are mine," he said in a deadly voice.

Erica gripped the gun fully in her hands just as Kinder forcibly rolled her over onto her back. Her heart pounded in her ears and her breathing was labored, but somehow her hands were steady. For a split second, she stared into the eyes of her kidnapper, her attacker, her would-be rapist.

He jabbed the needle of the syringe into her exposed upper arm.

She pointed the gun at him and pulled the trigger.


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 22

David heard the gunshot but from where he was laying on the floor, he couldn't see what had happened. He heard a groan, and he could hear Erica begin to sob again. He pulled himself into a semi-upright position and staggered toward Erica and Jonathan, praying that she was okay.

Erica was on the floor on the other side of the sofa, gasping for breath in between hysterical sobs. Kinder was partially on top of her, blood pouring from the wound in his chest, a wound David knew immediately would be fatal.

"Erica…" He blew out her name as he bent and pulled her out from under Kinder. She was covered in blood as well and she still held David's gun in her hands. David sat down hard on the floor beside her. He'd taken a vow to save lives as a doctor, but he couldn't bring himself to make even a half-hearted attempt to help the man beside them on the floor, not after what he'd witnessed that sick bastard doing to Erica.

Blood frothed at Jonathan's lips as he took shallow, raspy breaths. He groaned and reached an arm out toward Erica. She let out a soft cry of panic and pushed herself out of his reach. She raised her hands again, pointing the gun at him.

"Erica…. Erica, give me the gun," David said gently.

Her eyes were locked on Kinder, and she shook her head very slightly at David.

"No!" she whispered urgently in between sobs, shaking her head again more intently this time. "No! Not again. Not again!"

Not again? He wasn't sure what she meant by that, if she meant that she didn't want to shoot him again, or… He tried to close off his mind to the thoughts of what Jonathan Kinder had done to Erica. He scooted closer to her, moving up alongside of her, cringing in pain from the bullet wound to his shoulder.

"It's okay," he said softly. He looked past her to Jonathan Kinder. His former colleague drew his last breath amidst a widening pool of blood.

"He's dead. He's dead Erica. Give me the gun," David said in what he hoped was a calm voice as he reached out with his right hand to take the gun from her surprisingly steady hands. The weapon felt massively heavy in his hands, and he placed it on the floor out of Erica's reach. It was no longer needed.

Erica was silent, still staring at the man who'd so violently attacked her. David felt like he ought to say something comforting to her. He tried to string words together, but at that moment he was just so relieved that she was alive, that this was almost over.

Then he saw the syringe.

Erica's clothes were torn, leaving her left shoulder and upper arm exposed, and the needle of a syringe was partially embedded in the skin, almost dangling there, held up by the torn fabric that bunched on her arm. That bastard must have jabbed her right before she got her hands on the gun. David had no idea what was in the syringe or how much of it he'd managed to inject into her, but he needed to get it out before any more damage was done.

Erica saw him reach for her, and she raised her own hand toward her other arm, suddenly remember the burning sensation she'd felt there.

"No! Let me!" David leaned forward with his good arm, and pulled the needle out of her arm, careful not to push the syringe plunger. He wasn't sure how much – if any – of the mysterious contents had been injected into her, but he didn't want to take any chances. He fumbled around on the floor for the cap to the needle before slipped the capped syringe in his pocket. The sooner it could be identified, the better, since Kinder had apparently been doping her with it, or something similar to it.

"You're hurt," she pushed out in a broken voice.

He shook his head. "Just the shoulder. It'll be fine."

"You're bleeding."

"I know. I have a car at the end of the driveway. We need to get to a hospital. Let's go," he said as he pushed himself into a standing position, fighting off the dizziness that he knew was caused by the loss of blood. He stumbled toward the front door and grabbed the scarf he'd seen hanging by the door.

"Erica? Can you help me tie this? It'll help slow the blood loss."

"Erica?"

He turned to look for her.

She had pushed herself up onto her knees on the floor, and she was staring at the lifeless body of Jonathan Kinder. His eyes were open, pupils fixed and dilated. It was a disturbing site, even to a man who'd seen death many times over in the operating room. David couldn't begin to imagine how upsetting it must be for her.

"ERICA!" he yelled, hoping to get her attention, knowing that she was likely going into some sort of shock from the trauma of the entire kidnapping and now Kinder's violent end. Using his good hand and his teeth, David managed to knot the scarf around his shoulder. It wasn't the best tourniquet, but it would have to do.

He reached down with his good arm and jerked Erica onto her feet. "Come on. We need to go."

He put his arm around her waist, intending to let her lean on him for support, given her injured ankle. He looked down at Erica, and panic welled in him once again. Her eyes were glassy, and her breathing was shallow.

He cupped her face, making her look up at him. That vacant look in her eyes made his blood run cold. Whatever was in that syringe had apparently made it into her.


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 23

David wrapped his arm around Erica's waist, and together they left the cabin. In the short time he'd been in the cabin, the wind had picked up and the snow was coming down heavier now in big fluffy white flakes. The cold air burned his lungs, and he could feel the warm blood spilling from the wound in his shoulder begin to cool in the frigid night air. Maybe the cold was good for something if it kept him from bleeding to death.

Erica hobbled beside him, but with each step, she seemed to have more and more difficulty walking.

"David?" Her speech sounded slurred to her own ears. Why was it slurred? It was so cold, so very cold, and her entire body ached. Why was he dragging her through the snow when it was so nice and warm inside?

"We're going to the SUV at the end of the driveway, and I'm going to get you to the hospital. I think Kinder drugged you again before…" He let his voice trail off. He didn't want to say "Before you shot him" and risk upsetting her.

"Cold…" she mumbled.

"I know. Come on, keep going," he said as he pulled her along. Her head tipped forward, and her legs seemed to buckle underneath her.

Erica looked in the distance, trying to see the SUV David was talking about. She couldn't make out anything. Snowflakes swirled around her, blinding her, and making her feel like the world was spinning wildly out of control. The sense of vertigo was overwhelming, and she thought she might throw up. She closed her eyes to try to stop the sudden nausea and the feeling that her body was no longer obeying her commands.

"Tired…" she whispered.

"No! Erica – stay awake! Do not pass out on me," he yelled at her.

David tried to continuing moving forward. He could see the SUV in the distance, and if he could just get her into the vehicle, he could drive them both to the hospital. There was a hospital in town - he'd seen it as he'd driven out to the lakeside cabin. He doubted it was the most state of the art facility, but it was better than nothing.

Why hadn't he taken the time to find a coat or a blanket for her? That seemed incredibly stupid now, but he didn't want to waste time by going back to the cabin. Her legs gave out, and Erica stumbled in the snow. He desperately wanted to scoop her up in his arms and run for the vehicle, but the gunshot wound had rendered his left arm near useless.

David stopped and pulled her back onto her feet. "Can you put your arms around my neck?" Erica stared up at him with a glassy-eyed and confused expression on her face.

He turned so he was facing her and moved her left arm around his neck. He bent his knees enough to slide his right arm below her bottom, and he lifted her up, letting her rest her head on the top of his shoulder. He didn't know how long he could carry her long like that, but it was better than dragging her through the snow. Parking this far from the cabin had seemed like such a good idea when he arrived here, but now David was cursing his decision to leave the vehicle so far away in this weather. Why hadn't he looked for the keys to Kinder's van? God, that was stupid of him. So many things he wished he'd done differently…

Erica tried to hold tight to David's neck, but she was having trouble feeling her arms and legs, much less controlling them. Somewhere in the back of her mind, it occurred to her that she was safe now from Jonathan Kinder. Surely the worst was over. It occurred to her that she should thank David, but when she opened her mouth, she couldn't form words.

Then suddenly David was yelling at her. Why was he yelling? Her head was near his. There was no reason to yell, she thought. She closed her eyes again. It felt so much better to close them, to let the darkness surround her. David was a doctor, and he'd take care of her. That was the last conscious thought she had before her entire world went black.

David felt her arm go limp around his neck, and he cursed loudly. "ERICA? ERICA! Damn it! I told you once before, you aren't allowed to die on me! NO ONE is allowed to die on me? You got that?"

He shifted her body against his and winced as he brought his left arm around her as well, trying to move her to a more stable position, one that would allow him to get to the vehicle faster. He gasped in pain as he felt blood running down his chest and back.

The tourniquet he'd fashioned was now pretty much useless, and a wave of dizziness from loss of blood nearly knocked him off of his feet. He wondered what time it was. Surely if the call to 911 had gone through, they'd be here by now. He prayed it had gone through because he was suddenly unsure that he could get them both into the vehicle and all the way to a hospital. He debated searching his pockets for his phone and attempting to call 911 again, but he didn't want to waste any time. He could call again when they got to the SUV. If he could just get Erica to the car, get the vehicle started and the heater revved up, they'd be out of the elements until help arrived.

David shivered against the bitter cold and the wind and clutched Erica tighter against him. He was so close to the vehicle, so very close. He stumbled as another wave of dizziness rushed over him. He nearly lost his grip on Erica, and as he struggled to hold onto her, they both tumbled into the snow.

He knew he needed to get up, that cold and loss of blood would overtake him if he didn't. He hadn't come this far to die in the snow. He'd promised Erica he'd get her home. Maybe he could just rest here for a minute, just a few minutes at the most, and then he could get up.

David shifted on the ground, pulling Erica's body on top of his so she'd at least be out of the snow until he could get up again. He tucked her head down against the side of his neck and wrapped his good around her as tightly as possible, hoping he could keep her warm.

He couldn't tell if he was hearing things or if it was just wishful thinking, but he thought maybe, just maybe, he could hear sirens in the distance.

Then everything went black.


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24

Erica blinked her eyes a few times, trying to focus. She was almost positive she was lying on her back and blinking up at the ceiling. Was she still in the bed at Jonathan Kinder's cabin? Where was David? David had been there, hadn't he? Oh God, had it all been a drug-induced hallucination?

She blinked again and tried to focus on her body and how it felt. She'd been injured, she'd been in pain. How bad was it now? She could feel something unpleasant in her arm, but she was massively relieved to realize that her hands were no longer cuffed to the headboard of the bed.

She slowly lifted her arm toward her face and was horrified to see a needle protruding from a vein in the inside of her elbow. It was taped there, connected to some sort of plastic tubing.

She was fast-losing her battle to stay calm at the sight of what looked like an IV needle in her arm. Dear God, what was he doing to her now? The injections weren't enough? When would it stop? Her heart raced, her chest tightened, and her breath came in short gasps as she reached with a shaky hand for the needle in her arm.

"No… no more drugs. No more needles…" she blew out weakly as she tried to sit up. No, she couldn't take it anymore! She couldn't! She wouldn't let him do this to her! She'd worked so hard, so damn hard for so very long to stay sober!

She winced in pain as she quickly ripped off the tape and pulled the needle out of her arm. Blood spurted from the open vein, and she gasped in shock. Blood... She'd been covered in blood. It was all over her. She closed her eyes for a second, and she could see Jonathan Kinder's face, a mask of shock and horror as he stared down at her and blood poured from his chest onto her.

"Oh God," she whispered. Her hands shook as she dropped the needle and tubing.

"Erica!"

She heard someone calling her name, but she was too lost to respond. Something clamped down on her arm, and she thought she heard someone yelling, but all she could comprehend was that a man's hand was on her arm, and she didn't want to be touched.

She pulled back from the hands that touched her, shaking her head. "No! No more drugs! No more needles! Please, no!" she pleaded, turning her face away, attempting to pull away from his grasp. Oh God, she couldn't cope with this, not any more. She was going to lose her mind. That was what Jonathan wanted, wasn't it? That was what he said to her, that she was like a wild horse in need of breaking. And he would break her. There was only so much she could handle before she lost what was left of her sanity. Her body ached, and it didn't seem to get the message from her brain to fight off this unwanted physical contact, to muster the strength to push him away. She squeezed her eyes shut and braced herself for the inevitable attack.

Hands were on her shoulders and upper arms now, gently shaking her and embracing her at the same time.

"Erica, sweetheart, it's Jack. It's Jack. You're safe. You're in a hospital. Erica, honey can you hear me?"

Jack?

A gentle touch caressed her hair before pulling her hand from her face.

"It's Jack, and you're safe."

She blinked and stared at him and shook her head. "You're not real. It's the drugs," she whispered, trying to fight back tears. It felt real. It really did. She could see her husband, hear his voice, and that touch, the way he held her hand – that felt real and familiar. But no, not with the frightening combination of drugs Kinder had used to torture and control her. No, Jack wasn't here. He wasn't in the cabin. He hadn't been in the cabin at all.

"Honey, I promise I'm real. You're not on any drugs. Not anymore. You're in the hospital."

A nurse walked into the room behind Jack with a worried look on her face. "Oh, she's awake," she said, her tone and her expression both brightening.

Jack turned away from Erica, "Yeah, she pulled out her IV, and she's bleeding. Can I get a bandage or something?"

Erica stared at Jack and the nurse in shock. Was she really in a hospital? Was the entire ordeal really all over?

The nurse fussed over her arm as Erica looked around the room in confusion. It really was a hospital room, she realized, and she was wearing a very ugly hospital gown. She looked down at her hands and saw that both of her wrists had gauze bandages of some kind wrapped around them. Her arm hurt where she'd ripped out the IV needle. Her face and head both ached, and her ankle still hurt.

The nurse bandaged Erica's arm to stop the bleeding and then frowned as she gathered the IV pieces. "We'll need to put this somewhere else I guess. I don't want to damage that vein, and I don't know about using a hand given the injuries to your wrists. Maybe in your other arm," she said.

The bewildered expression on Erica's face quickly turned to one of fear. "NO! No drugs, no needles!"

The nurse looked at Jack and then at Erica in sympathy. "It's a saline IV. You were dehydrated. Your husband told us about your history - you haven't been given any controlled substances since you arrived here."

Erica shook her head and wrapped her arms around herself. "No needles. If you need me to drink something I will, but no more needles," she said firmly.

The nurse frowned in response. "Let me speak to the doctor. I'll be right back."

The door to Erica's hospital room closed, and Jack turned to his wife. "My God, you have no idea how worried I've been about you," he blew out, squeezing her hand gently as he smiled at her. He lifted her hand and pressed a tender kiss into her palm, just past the edge of her bandages. He wanted to take her into his arms, kiss her, hold onto her and never, ever let her go, but he was afraid he'd scare her. She had a haunted, terrified look about her, and it broke his heart. He sure hadn't expected her to awaken in such a panic.

"The drugs… I was injected with something," she whispered. She needed to make sure he knew, that he'd make sure the doctors knew.

"I know sweetheart. It's okay. The doctors were able to counteract the effects of the drugs were you given. You're going to be okay."

She took that in for a moment as she tried to still her racing heart. She was really going to be okay, physically at least.

"Your wrists were bleeding and bruised, and they did give you an antibiotic for that just to be on the safe side, in case of infection, and they gave you a tetanus booster too. We're not sure how long you were out in the snow and the cold. You have a mild case of hypothermia, but you don't appear to have any frostbite, which is pretty surprising, all things considered. Your ankle is sprained, but thankfully not broken."

Erica sank back against the pillows.

Jack hesitated for a moment. "You also have a hairline fracture in your cheekbone and a lot of bruising, but the doctor said it should heal on its own in time. He said there shouldn't be any lasting damage to your face. Unfortunately it's probably going to hurt for a while."

"My head hurts," she said softly.

He reached out a gently brushed a lock of hair away from her face, feeling sick at the sight of the bruises on her cheek. "That's probably a side effect from the drugs you were given. The doctor said you might feel a little bit like you have a hangover for a day or so."

Erica was silent as she took in all of this information. After a few moments, she spoke up. "Where are we?"

"Concord, New Hampshire. The police and local EMTs brought you to the nearest hospital, and they transported you here by ambulance."

"I want to go home," Erica whispered.

He nodded. "I know you do. I think they're going to want to keep you here for another day or two before they let me spring you," he said, offering her a smile he hoped would relax her a little bit.

"My girls… Kendall and Bianca… do they know that I'm here?" she asked suddenly.

He smiled at her. "Of course. Bianca was ready to get on the first plane home the moment she heard you were missing. Kendall and Bianca have both been worried sick about you. I called them once we got here and the doctor said you were stable. Kendall wanted to come up here, but I promised her that we'd be back home just as soon as possible. This way you can rest until they're ready to release you because I know you certainly won't rest once we get home."

"Reggie and Lily have both been very worried about you too," he added. "They can't wait to see you. Even Greenlee was concerned."

She nodded as she picked at the gauze bandages on her wrists.

Jack had a difficult subject to broach with his wife, and he knew he'd have to do it sooner rather than later. The doctor had asked about it, but he'd asked that he be the one to bring it up to Erica once she regained consciousness.

He reached over and took her hands in his, and took a deep breath, hoping he could keep his voice steady, praying that he'd get the answer he wanted.

"Erica, sweetheart, when you were brought in, the medical staff and the police and FBI made some assumptions and acted accordingly just in case. They made sure to save all of the clothes you were wearing as evidence and they documented your injuries, but we all need to know if we need to get a rape kit for you," he said carefully, watching her face for a reaction.

Erica heard his words, but they didn't make sense to her. A rape kit? Why would they need that? She closed her eyes for a moment, and she saw Jonathan's face again, the way he'd stared in shock as he bled to death practically on top of her. She closed her eyes for a moment, and she was instantly back there in the cabin. She could see the blood frothing at his mouth, hear his raspy breath until it finally stopped. He was dead. David told her he was dead. David took the gun from her. Jonathan Kinder was dead. What did it matter now – at least from a legal standpoint - whether or not he'd raped her? What good was a rape kit and forensic evidence now?

She pulled her hands away from Jack's and pressed them against her temples, keeping her eyes closed. Flashes of memory flickered before her. His hands had been on her, touching her, hurting her, tearing at the dress she'd been wearing. She could remember trying to free her hands, pulling so hard against the handcuffs that she screamed in pain. He had been on top of her. He was going to hurt her even worse than he already had. He was going to break her, deliver a wound to her soul so severe she was certain she'd never recover from it. And then…

She opened her eyes. David had been there. He'd pulled Jonathan off of her. He'd stopped the attack.

She blew out a shaky breath. "No, I don't," she said quietly, watching as Jack visibly relaxed. "He was… violent. He hurt me. He would have raped me," her voice broke when she said the word, "But it was stopped…"

She paused.

"Where's David?"

Jack moved to Erica, very carefully pulling her into a gentle embrace. He desperately needed to put his arms around her and reassure himself that she was really here and really alive, that despite the suffering she'd obvious endured, at least she hadn't been raped again as well.

Erica let herself relax into Jack's embrace. It felt so good to feel his arms around her again. She inhaled deeply, taking in the familiar smell of his cologne. She'd told herself during the ordeal at the cabin that if she could just hold on long enough, she'd be back in Jack's arms again. David coming for her, David finding her at the cabin was all wrong and made no sense at all to her, but she could sort all of that out later. There was plenty of time to thank him for being there and figure out the hows and whys of the whole thing. For now she was content to rest her head on Jack's chest and listen to the sound of his heart beating and concentrate on the gentle touch of his hands on her hair and her skin. It felt so safe, so right that he was here.

"I love you so much," he whispered softly to her as he kissed the top of her head. "I was so afraid I'd never be able to do this again, never be able to hold you in my arms again."

Erica felt tears well in her eyes, and she gripped at his shirt with her injured hands. "I'm here. I'm here, and I knew you would find me," she murmured against his chest.

She lifted her head after a moment and gazed at her husband. He was looking at her with such love and concern. She leaned in and gently brushed her lips across his. It wasn't a passionate kiss - she knew him well enough to know that he'd be too worried about hurting her because of the bruises on her face for anything truly passionate - but it was something that she needed to do. He smiled reassuringly at her after the kiss and then laid her back carefully, fluffing her pillows for her.

"I know the doctor is going to want to take a look at you now that you're awake, and I want to know when I can spring you from here," he said with a smile.

Erica smiled back, happy that he hadn't released her hand. She was forgetting something though. What was it? She felt so confused, and she wasn't sure if it was a result of the drugs Jonathan Kinder had given to her or if it was something else entirely, some mental reaction to the trauma of the entire ordeal? Had Jonathan been trying to kill her with that last syringe? Or just knock her unconscious? She thought about asking Jack, but the way that he looked at her when he asked about the rape kit... she didn't want to discuss any details of the kidnapping with Jack. It would hurt him far too much to have to hear how she'd suffered. She didn't want him to look at her like she was broken. David would tell her though, she thought absentmindedly as Jack caressed her hand.

David... Jack still hadn't answered her question about David. In fact, he'd avoided it. That made no sense. Why would Jack avoid her question about David? And why would he ask about a rape kit? That thought kept tumbling in her head, and it made no sense. Jonathan was dead. Why would Jack ask? Why would the police ask? She was so confused.

"Jack, where's David?" she asked again. His expression hardened and his eyes darkened noticeably in a look of... what was that? Anger? Yes, it seemed like anger, but that made no sense to Erica.

"Shhh… you don't have to worry about him right now," Jack said in a reassuring voice. "You should rest."

"No, David, he…" she started to say before Jack shushed her again.

"Honey, you don't have to worry about Jonathan Kinder OR David Hayward. They can't hurt you anymore."


	25. Chapter 25

_Author's Note: Thank you so much for all of the incredibly thoughtful reviews and private messages about this story! I am so glad you're enjoying it! _

Chapter 25

Jack's choice of words confused her. Jonathan and David couldn't hurt her anymore? Jonathan was dead, she was sure of that! She watched him die. David said he was dead! Did that mean that David was too? A wave of nausea washed over her at the thought of someone dying because of her. David was, well, he was David, and she hated him with a fiery passion for what he'd done to Bianca and Miranda, but he didn't deserve to die, not when he'd been in the midst of doing something so uncharacteristically unselfish like attempting to save her life.

"Did David… is he… he was shot," she said slowly, unable to put the words together. Maybe if she didn't outright say it, then it wouldn't be true. That was magical, nonsensical thinking of course, but she didn't care. David found her, he pulled Jonathan off of her, he stopped him from… she didn't want to put those words into a coherent thought either. No, he couldn't be dead. Surely he didn't die because of what he'd done for her.

Jack's expression hardened. "Hayward's alive," he spit out in disgust. "He was shot in the shoulder and he lost a lot of blood, but he'll survive. I'm beginning to think the man has nine lives."

Erica stared at Jack for a long moment, unable to comprehend the anger and disgust in his voice and the hateful expression on his face. It made no sense to her, none of this did.

"Where is he?" she finally asked.

"You don't have to worry about him, sweetheart," Jack said, caressing her hand gently.

"Is he here, in this hospital?" Erica demanded.

Jack sighed in frustration, misinterpreting her demands as a need for reassurance. "Yes, he's here in the hospital too, but you don't need to fear for your safety. He's under police guard, and as soon as the doctor releases him from the hospital, he's going to jail. I promise you that."

Erica jerked her hands away from her husband. "What? Why on earth would David go to jail?" she asked, her voice a mix of shock and anger.

Jack stared at his wife. Surely she wasn't going to defend the bastard! He was about to speak but then it hit him. She'd been pretty heavily drugged for the past few days, and she'd been unconscious when she'd been found in the snow with Hayward. She obviously had no idea what had happened.

"Before you take my head off, I want you to lie back in the bed and calm down. You're supposed to be resting," he chided.

Erica narrowed her eyes at her husband and then sighed before complying. "I want you to tell me everything. Why is David under arrest? Jack, he shouldn't be under arrest!"

"Calm down Erica," Jack said, trying to keep his tone light. It frustrated him to no end that she was defending that S.O.B., even though he was willing to accept that she didn't know the full truth about what had happened to her.

"David is under arrest as an accomplice in your kidnapping and for drugging you. The FBI has been questioning him. Once they get a chance to interview you, there may be more charges, but suffice it to say, he's not going to get away with this. I promise Erica, I will not let David Hayward hurt you again. I give you my word."

Erica stared at him, completely dumbfounded. Several moments passed before she found her voice. "David didn't kidnap me, Jack. Jonathan Kinder did."

"We know that Kinder was likely the one who took you from our house that morning," he responded, "But Hayward didn't have an alibi that morning and refused to permit the police to search his home without a warrant. Kinder had been in jail, and he was meeting with a probation officer – he wouldn't have had the time to set up that cabin and make all the arrangements to come after you, not to mention putting together the veritable pharmacy of drugs the FBI found at that cabin."

"Jonathan is – was – a very smart man, Jack. And he had nothing but time, years even, to plan this," Erica said quietly.

Jack looked at her in surprise. She seemed to know Kinder was dead. He wondered again exactly what had transpired at the cabin that led to both men being shot. As much as he didn't want her to have to relive everything for the FBI, he was anxious to hear what she had to say.

"Erica, right now the belief is that David may have helped Jonathan put the whole thing together and then turned on him. Maybe turning on his was always David's plan – we really don't know yet. Those drugs found at the cabin? The FBI and the police aren't even sure what all of it is yet!"

"But that doesn't mean that David – "

Jack cut her off. "When you were found, you and David were both unconscious in the snow near his vehicle. He had a passport and a large sum of cash in the vehicle. He had an overnight bag with him. There was a gun at the cabin registered to him, and it's most likely the same gun that was used to kill Jonathan Kinder. David had a syringe in his pocket that contained the same drugs the doctors found in your system."

Erica remembered David pulling the needle from her arm, but she couldn't recall what he'd done with it after that. All she could see was Kinder's lifeless form and his blood all over her clothes.

"Honey, David is the one who told the police and the FBI about the cabin. He's known Kinder for years. They were in medical school together. The FBI is still trying to piece together their interactions after that. We think… we think that David either helped Jonathan kidnap you or at least knew it was going to happen and did nothing to stop it. He went to the police about the cabin to incriminate Jonathan, but we think that he planned to take you from there and flee the country before the police could get there. From what we can tell, he went straight from the Pine Valley police station to that cabin."

Erica stared at him in shock. This was without a doubt the most preposterous thing she'd ever heard. If it weren't for David… oh God, she didn't even want to think about what would have happened if David hadn't been there to pull Jonathan off of her!

She felt so disoriented, so out of sorts, and this incredibly confusing conversation with Jack wasn't helping. She closed her eyes for a moment and tried to remember everything that David had said to her. She'd been in such a state of shock over the entire ordeal that it was hard to make sense of anything.

"_Need to get you to a hospital..." "Don't want you to freeze to death…" "You aren't allowed to die on me…"_

She opened her eyes again and looked at Jack.

"David wasn't there to hurt me," she said with a slight shake of her head, a move she instantly regretted, as it made the room appear to spin.

"You don't know what you're talking about, sweetheart," Jack said in a sympathetic voice.

"No, I know exactly what I'm talking about, and I need to see him," she said, throwing back the blankets as she moved to get out of the other side of the hospital bed.


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter 26

Jack leaned over the bed and grabbed his wife by the arms. "I don't think so. Get back in the bed."

Erica stared at him in shock. "No! Let go of me!"

He released her but didn't back down. "You are injured! You could have died. You are recovering from a near drug overdose. You've been through an incredibly traumatic experience. The last thing you need is to confront one of your attackers."

She glared at her husband, hating that he was right about the physical toll the entire ordeal had taken on her. Just getting out of bed and attempting to balance on her good foot and ankle while supporting herself on the hospital bed made her feel like she might pass out. Still, she wasn't about to back down.

"David is NOT an "attacker." He saved my life!"

It was Jack's turn to look shocked. "Erica, you don't know what you're saying!"

She leaned on the hospital bed for support. "I know exactly what I'm saying. Jonathan Kinder was… he was hurting me when David showed up at that cabin. Jonathan shot David when we were trying to escape! He carried me through the snow when I was drugged and he was about to bleed to death from a gunshot wound. He wasn't kidnapping me – he was trying to get us both to a hospital! Jack, David is NOT the villain here!"

Jack sat down hard in the chair next to Erica's hospital bed and stared at her, mouth agape. He wasn't sure what to believe at this point, but she was adamant that Hayward was innocent.

"The FBI is going to want to talk to you about this," he said quietly.

"Fine. I'll talk to them after I see David," she said as she limped around the side of the bed.

He stood quickly, his arms outstretched to catch her. Despite her determination to get out of bed, Erica didn't look very stable on her feet. Jack was massively relieved when the doctor entered the room seconds later.

"Ms. Kane, I understand that you have an objection to the IV?" the doctor asked, noting with surprise that his patient was out of the bed.

"I refuse to consent to any needles or any drugs," Erica said as firmly as she could as she limped to the foot of the bed. "I need real clothes, something other than this hospital gown, and I need to see Dr. David Hayward. I understand he's a patient here as well."

The doctor was taken aback by his star patient's bluntness as well as her determination to get up and roam the hospital. He'd expected the TV host and former model to be the type who'd milk an injury and a hospital stay for all it was worth.

"Erica, get back in the bed," Jack said in frustration. "You don't need to be walking on that ankle."

"Then get me a wheelchair."

Jack stepped to the side, meeting Erica at the foot of the bed and blocking her exit from the room. "I know that you're upset. You've been through a horrific experience. You need your rest, and the FBI needs to talk to you."

Erica glared up at her husband in irritation. "The FBI can wait."

Jack turned toward the doctor. "Would you please explain to my wife that she's recovering from multiple injuries and a near overdose of narcotics, and that she does not need to be wandering the hospital right now?"

The doctor looked down at his patient's chart. He didn't envy this Jackson Montgomery. Erica Kane was beautiful, sure, but he'd hate to have to deal with this sort of attitude every day. He looked up at his patient who at the moment was glaring daggers at him.

"Um, well, if Ms. Kane feels up to visiting with others, and she's willing to use a wheelchair if she leaves her room, I think that can be arranged…" he stammered.

"As for the IV, you seem to be doing much better, so as long as you are eating and drinking plenty, I think we can probably forgo that as well at this point," he said backing up toward the door. "I'll, um, go check with a nurse or an orderly about getting a wheelchair for you."

In the end, Jack won, but only because Derek Frye, FBI Agent Joan Foster, another agent from the FBI's Boston office, and a local police detective all insisted to Erica that until she gave them her statement, they wouldn't permit her to see David.

She relented and spent the next several hours answering their questions. Jack offered to stay by her side as she gave a statement to law enforcement, and if she was forced to really give the issue some thought, she'd have to admit that she really did like the idea of having him there for moral support. Yet for reasons she couldn't fully articulate to Jack, she asked him to wait outside.

He'd looked so dejected by her insistence that he wait outside her hospital room, but she didn't feel that she had any other option. It was already hard for her to discuss the brutally violent rape she'd suffered on her fourteenth birthday, and she'd had years to come to grips with that attack. Detailing the last few days of her life for the police and FBI, talking about how very close she'd just come to being raped again, when she'd barely had time to process it all herself… just thinking about it made her nauseated. How was she supposed to discuss it?

She wouldn't put Jack through that. She couldn't. It was bad enough that she had to relive it all for the benefit of law enforcement. There was no reason Jack should have to hear in minute detail how she'd suffered at Jonathan Kinder's hands. No, she would spare Jack that. He'd already had to help her cope with drug and alcohol addiction, with the loss of her mother, with the "death" of Miranda. If he needed to know specifics, he could get them from Derek, and it would be easier on everyone that way.


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter 27

When Derek and Joan finally emerged from Erica's hospital room, Derek shook his head in disbelief at Jack. "She's adamant that Hayward is the hero here, that he saved her life. We'll question him again, but if his story matches hers, we don't have a reason to hold him."

"What did she say about Hayward and Kinder both being shot?" Jack demanded.

"Ms. Kane says that Jonathan Kinder shot David and that she shot Jonathan in self-defense," Agent Foster replied. "At this point, Mr. Montgomery, it appears that Dr. Hayward was merely doing his civic duty when he came to the police station in Pine Valley."

Jack scoffed at the idea of Hayward and civic duty. The man never did anything for anyone without expecting something in return, and he hated the idea of Erica feeling indebted to him.

"What about the passport, the money, the overnight bag – all of that stuff you found in his vehicle?" Jack asked.

Derek exchanged glances with the FBI agent. "Erica says that Kinder told her they were going to Canada and from there to somewhere in South America. This confirms what David told us at the police station – that he thought the cabin was a stopping place en route to Canada. When we questioned David, he said he had all of those things in case he didn't get to the cabin in time, so he could try to follow them into Canada."

"The syringe in his pocket matched the drugs in Erica's system," Jack reminded them both.

"Your wife says that Jonathan jabbed her with the syringe when she reached for the gun, and that David pulled the syringe from her arm and took it from her," Joan said. "Her story confirms what Dr. Hayward told us earlier today: that he capped the syringe and took it with him so the contents could be tested and Erica could be treated."

Derek offered his friend a slight shake of the head. "Jack, really, Erica is adamant that she left the cabin willingly with Hayward and that he never hurt her. His running up here, bursting into the cabin with a loaded gun was beyond stupid, but he did nothing illegal."

Joan flipped through her notes and then looked hard at both men. "The bottom line is that David Hayward was absolutely correct when he showed up at the police station in Pine Valley, and you both did your best to delay an investigation into that cabin. Hours were wasted, and an innocent man was shot!"

"Look, you don't know David Hayward," Derek broke in indignantly. "If he appears innocent here, it would be a first because there is nothing remotely innocent about that man!"

Joan regarded both men with disdain. "Chief Frye, you should be thanking your lucky stars that the only dead body you have on your hands is Jonathan Kinder's," she said stiffly before turning and walking away.

Jack watched her leave before he turned back to Derek. "Does Erica know Hayward came to the police station?"

Derek shook his head. "No."

"How is she?" he asked, nodding toward the closed hospital room door.

Derek shrugged. "Quiet. Still in shock maybe. Hard to say. You know her far better than I do. You should be with her right now."

Jack nodded tersely and walked past the chief of police and into his wife's room. She was sitting in the hospital bed with a box of tissues in her lap. She looked like she'd been crying, but she at least attempted a smile when she saw her husband.

"Are you okay?" he asked gently.

She twisted a tissue in her fingers. "Can I see David now?"

"As soon as the FBI is finished with him," Jack said. "Do you want to talk about it? About everything that happened?"

Erica immediately shook her head. "I don't want to talk about it. I don't even want to _think_ about it."

Jack sighed. He was worried about this. Erica's default reaction to trauma was to turn inward and internalize it, to pretend it never happened. She'd come so far in coping with her own prior addictions and traumas as well as Bianca's rape, Miranda's birth and her miraculous return. He hated to see her backslide because of Kinder.

"Maybe it would be helpful if I contact Dr. Tolan or another therapist and go ahead and set up a few sessions for us when we get home," Jack suggested.

"No!" she said firmly.

"Sweetheart, I know you went to some rape counseling sessions after everything that happened with Bianca, and you found that to be very helpful. You've gone to meetings for the alcoholism and the addiction to painkillers. You were kidnapped by a man who played a big role in your addiction, you were drugged, and you suffered for days while he held you captive. It's only natural to think that some therapy, maybe just a few sessions, would be beneficial for you. For us even. If you want me to go with you I will," he urged.

Erica stared at him for a moment, unsure of what to say. Finally she shook her head. "Jack, you're right – I did suffer through a horrible ordeal. But it JUST happened. I haven't even been released from the hospital yet. I haven't seen my daughters or had a chance to get back to my own home. I… I need time. I need to be able to deal with this my own way."

"Honey, you know that I love you, and that I would do anything for you," he started slowly.

She nodded in response, twisting the tissue around her finger again.

"With your history, the way your sobriety was damaged, I just don't want to take any chances, and I'd feel better if we could see a counselor and maybe try to head off any problems," he offered.

Erica bit her bottom lip. "You expect me to fail," she said quietly. "You think I'm going to fall apart, fall off the wagon."

"No! No, that's not it at ALL! Honey, I just want to do what's best for you!" he insisted.

"Then please, please don't push me, Jack. Please just let me try to cope, let me try to sort out all of my feelings in my head before you insist that I'm in need of mental help!"

"Erica I'm NOT," he started to say before he paused and then sighed. "Sweetheart, you know that I love you. I didn't mean to imply that there's anything wrong with you or that I think you're going to fall apart. I just want to make sure that you're going to be okay."

"I'll be okay when I talk to David, and when I get out of this hospital and this hideous excuse for a gown," she said, forcing a smile to reassure him.


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter 28

David heard the knock on his hospital room door and groaned inwardly. He was tired of the endless questions from law enforcement officers who he frankly thought were completely and utterly inept. He turned his head toward the door and was about to bark out a less-than-polite response to the unwelcome visitor when a nurse flung the door open and wheeled Erica Kane into his room.

"You have a visitor, Dr. Hayward," the nurse said in a too-chipper voice that nurses always seemed to reserve for the most difficult of patients.

David tried to sit up straighter in his bed, wincing in pain as he moved. Erica looked… well, she looked okay, all things considered. She was wearing a plush ivory-colored robe, and she had a blanket tucked around her legs. Traces of the traumatized woman he'd found at the cabin were still subtly present in everything from the slight tremble in her bandaged hands to the haunted look in her eyes. He didn't like seeing her like that. The swelling in her face seemed to have improved, but it was hard to tell since her hair was falling partially over that cheek.

"I'll be waiting outside when you're ready to leave, Ms. Kane," the nurse offered as she shut the door behind Erica. They both stared at each other for an uncomfortably long moment.

"This is a nice surprise," he said genuinely. "You're the first person I've actually wanted to see today. How are you?"

"The doctor says I'm going to be okay, thanks to you. Near fatal overdose of narcotics, fractured cheekbone, sprained ankle, various and sundry bruises, scrapes and injuries," she said in an oddly detached voice, "but I'm alive."

He wasn't sure what to say to that. They stared at each other for several quiet moments before she spoke again.

"David, I… I wanted to apologize." There, it was back – real emotion in her voice, he noted silently. She was hesitant, and she looked genuinely remorseful.

"For what?" he asked. He was shocked. Getting an apology out of Erica usually required a Herculean effort, and at the moment he didn't have the slightest clue why she would feel the need to apologize for anything.

"For this. For everything. You risked your life to save me. You took a _bullet _for me. And you ended up arrested for it."

His instinct was to shrug casually in response to her words, but shrugging hurt the hell out of his injured shoulder. "You don't need to apologize for that. It took a while to straighten everything out with the police and the FBI, but your story matched mine, and I'm a free man again. Or as I'm sure Derek thinks, free to torment the good people of Pine Valley again," he said with a sarcastic laugh.

"I don't understand why you did it," she said seriously.

"What do you mean? Why I did what?"

She watched his face carefully. "Why you dropped everything to rush up here and find me. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm very glad you were there. I just don't really understand why you came after me. It seems so… unexpected."

He swallowed hard and for a second she thought she saw the muscles in his jaw clench.

"I don't know that it really matters why. I had an idea of where he might have taken you. I decided to check it out. That's all."

"Yes, but David, that's why we have police officers and FBI agents. Jack said you went to the police in Pine Valley. If you felt like that wasn't enough, you could have just placed a few phone calls and asked the local police to check it out." she insisted.

He scoffed in response. "Please. Those small town cops? God only knows where you'd be or what Jonathan Kinder would be doing to you right now if I'd done that. You know, Erica, instead of questioning everything, you could just accept that I saved your life and not look a gift horse in the mouth. I'm a heartless bastard who'd sell his soul for a few pieces of silver, remember? Let's just say that you owe me, and I'm sure I'll find a reason to collect at some point in the future."

She was taken aback by the harshness of his words and his tone of voice. What happened to the kind man who'd carried her out of the bedroom at Jonathan Kinder's cabin, who'd gently dressed her, who'd treated her with such compassion, who'd carried her through the snow when she couldn't walk anymore? That man, that David was the old David she'd once loved, the man she'd once trusted to help her and Bianca both cope with what Michael Cambias had done. The man in the hospital bed in front of her had a hard look in his eyes that took her back to the days surrounding Miranda's return home, and it made her incredibly uncomfortable.

"David, I am more grateful to you than you can possibly know," Erica said quietly. "I'll go now. I'm sorry I bothered you."

She called to the nurse then, and in moments, she was gone.

David threw his head back against the pillows and blew out an expletive. Why had he done that? She'd been right there in his room. She felt bad that he'd been injured and arrested. She'd come to check on him. What on earth possessed him to behave like such a jerk?

Erica was no doubt on her way back to her Jackson Montgomery, working herself into a righteous snit over his dismissal. That's exactly what it was – a dismissal. He'd dismissed her and her apology. It was for the best, really, he told himself. Any chance of remaining one of Erica's friends ended the day he drew a line in the sand and crossed over it, taking Babe's side, letting his newly discovered adult daughter hold onto 'Bess' when he knew full well that baby was really Miranda Montgomery. Erica would forever hate him for that, and it was best for everyone if that's how it stayed.

He closed his eyes and tried not to think about the look on her face when she left the room. He cursed again a few moments later when he heard a knock at the door.

He opened his eyes, hoping Jackson Montgomery wasn't about to storm into his room to yell at him or punch him in the face for insulting Erica.

"What the hell do you want now? I've said everything I have to say," he snapped at the plain-faced woman in the cheap black pantsuit.

FBI Agent Joan Foster walked into the room and closed the door behind her. "Dr. Hayward, I'd like to have a few words with you. Strictly off the record."


	29. Chapter 29

Chapter 29

"Welcome home!" Jackson Montgomery swept open the front door of their home and helped Erica into the foyer. Their respective children – even Bianca and her daughter Miranda – were waiting for them inside, along with a handful of their close friends.

Erica saw the happy faces, but she didn't hear anything anyone was saying to her. Her eyes were locked on the round table in the center of the foyer. She'd put her keys there, along with her phone and her papers and her purse. Her chest tightened, and she felt her heart begin to beat faster. She'd been about to leave for her meeting at the Valley Inn when a delivery man rang the doorbell. Had that really only been just a few days ago? It felt like a lifetime ago. She tried to draw a deep breath into her lungs, but her body seemed incapable of doing so.

'It's over. He's dead. He's gone. You're okay,' she told herself.

She was grateful when Bianca walked forward and pulled her into a tight hug. She held her daughter close and closed her eyes to avoid looking at that round table.

"Mom, oh my God! I'm so glad you're back!" Bianca exclaimed. "You can't begin to understand how worried we all were!"

Erica forced a smile for her daughter. She didn't want to think about how panicked her daughters must have been. "You really didn't need to come all the way home from Paris sweetheart," she said, "but I'm so glad to see you. Where is that beautiful baby girl of yours?"

Bianca grinned and helped Erica into the living room, pausing so Erica could hug Kendall and then Reggie. Because of her sprained ankle Erica was mostly stuck sitting on the sofa while everyone milled about her, wanting to talk to her, hug her, tell her how happy they were that she was home and okay. Was she okay? She didn't feel okay, not yet anyway.

She made the proper polite responses to everyone's questions and comments, but she felt incredibly uncomfortable. It got a little better when Bianca placed a sleepy Miranda in her arms. Erica held her granddaughter as the toddler drifted off to sleep. Somehow you weren't expected to make as much conversation if you were holding a sleeping child, and that was perfectly fine with her.

"Uncle Jack, how is mom, really?" Bianca asked Jackson quietly as she glanced over at her mother. Erica was seated on the sofa cradling Miranda and ostensibly talking to Myrtle, but Myrtle seemed to be the one doing all of the talking while Erica nodded every once in a while.

"To be honest kiddo, I'm not sure," Jack admitted. "She was in a total panic when she woke up in the hospital – she ripped out her IV and was convinced I wasn't really there, that everything was a drug-induced hallucination."

Bianca's eyes widened in surprise and concern and Jack instantly regretted his words. He didn't want to give her anything else to worry about, not when she had Miranda back and had put her own life back together.

"And then she was furious that the police and the FBI arrested Hayward, and it was everything I could do just to keep her from jumping out of the bed and running to his aid," he said quickly, deciding it was better to discuss David Hayward than it was to dwell on how terrified Erica had been when she awoke.

"Well, he did rescue her. I can understand that she'd feel like she owed him," Bianca said. "I just can't figure out what possessed him to do it. Don't get me wrong – I'm really glad he was there – it's just that he and mom haven't exactly been on good terms since I got Miranda back."

"No, they haven't," Jack said with a slight laugh. "In fact, I'd say them not being on good terms is more than a bit of an understatement."

"So did she see him?" Bianca asked.

"Yeah, she did, but only for a few minutes. I have no idea what happened in that room but when the nurse brought her back, she seemed….upset isn't really the right word given everything she's been through, but she definitely wasn't satisfied with the outcome."

"She wouldn't talk to you about it?"

Jack shook his head. "She refused to discuss it with me. Said it had been a waste of her time to try to talk to David, but that she was glad he wasn't going to jail."

Later that evening, Myrtle pulled Jack aside.

"I think we need to put an end to the festivities," she said.

Jack raised an eyebrow at her.

"Our girl is becoming more and more withdrawn. She's not really even talking anymore. She's just sitting there with sweet Miranda," Myrtle said. "I think maybe it's too much all at once for her. She's only just come home from the hospital."

Jack took in the scene and was forced to agree with Myrtle. Erica was sitting quietly on the sofa, her head resting against Miranda's, her eyes focused at some imaginary point in the distance. Opal and Kendall were seated on either side of her, attempting to draw her into conversation, but Erica wasn't really participating.

"I don't know what to think Myrtle, but I'm worried about Erica," he admitted.


	30. Chapter 30

_Author's Note: Sorry for the delay in posting. I'm trying to post at least once a day since I had a lot of this story already written, but we've gotten to a point in the story in which I'm re-writing a lot, so it's moving a little bit slower now. I appreciate your patience! Thank you again for all of the PMs! Feedback is always appreciated!_

Chapter 30

When the last of their family and friends had gone home or headed to bed and all of the doors were locked and the security alarm set, Jack tried to pull Erica into conversation as he tucked her into bed.

"You have no idea how much I missed you, how worried I was about you," he whispered as he wrapped his arms around his wife and placed soft kisses on her hair and her forehead.

Erica rested her head on his chest and listened to his heart beating. "I do know," she said softly. "I knew you'd come for you. I knew you'd find me. I told myself that over and over again when I was… there, in that cabin."

He pulled back from their embrace and gazed down at her in the dimly lit bedroom.

"Erica, sweetheart, you need to know that we did everything possible to find you, to bring you home. It kills me thinking about how you suffered because of Jonathan Kinder. If we could have gotten there sooner…"

Erica looked up at her husband and forced a small smile at him. "Darling, you did everything you could. The police and the FBI did everything they could. I'm home, and I'm safe, and I just…I don't want to talk about it anymore. Let's not discuss it. Let's just put it behind us and move on with our lives."

Jack swallowed hard and nodded. He had serious doubts about the wisdom of her coping methods. "I love you so much," he said as he held her close again.

"I know, I love you too," she whispered, resting her head on his chest again.

He respected her wishes and nothing else was said about Jonathan Kinder. Nothing else was said at all as Jack drifted off to sleep.

When his breathing became steady and his embrace loosened with sleep, Erica carefully moved his arms off of her and slid to the edge of the bed. Jack didn't stir as she lifted the blankets and climbed out of bed. Minutes later, she discarded her clothes and stepped into the shower.

She turned her back to the shower head and wrapped her arms around herself as she stood under the steamy hot stream of water. It took her back to the tiny shower in Jonathan Kinder's cabin. She looked up at the ceiling and tried to steady her breathing.

For a brief moment, the gleaming marble tiles and sleek frameless glass seemed to morph into the dingy shower stall in that tiny cabin bathroom. She shook her head adamantly.

'No! It's over. It's really over, and you survived. He did terrible things to you, but at the end of the day, you weren't raped again,' she told herself. That should be enough, shouldn't it? She wasn't raped again, and that should mean that she was fine, right? She could get over this. She _would_ get over this. She wasn't going to let the ghost of Jonathan Kinder ruin her life.

Her fingers brushed against her upper arm, and instantly she recalled him repeatedly jabbing her there with a needle, injecting some horrifying and unknown substance into her, drugging her against her will. The thought of his hands on her, holding her down, cuffing her, touching her… oh God, the memory of his touch made her nauseated. She braced her hand on the cool stone tile and drew in short breaths, hoping she wasn't about to become sick here in the shower.

She'd hoped a shower would help her relax, but now she just felt dirty. She reached for the bottle of Fusion body wash and inhaled the familiar scent – Kendall had personally been involved in creating this fragrance, and it was a favorite of both mother and daughter.

She poured a hefty amount onto a bath pouf and scrubbed her skin. Then she shampooed and conditioned her hair, and for good measure, refilled the bath pouf and scrubbed herself from head to toe again. She inhaled the scent of the body wash again.

'You're safe at home. There's no trace of him left on your skin. He's gone. It's over,' she told herself.

The bathroom had filled with steam from the shower, and the hot water was beginning to cool when she switched off the faucets, stepped out of the shower and reached for a towel.

"Erica?"

She startled and grasped her towel around her tightly.

"Jack! You scared me!" she gasped.

He looked at her in confusion. "What are you doing?"

"Taking a shower."

"Yeah, I see that. WHY? Honey, it's late. You should be asleep."

"I just wanted a hot shower. I thought it might help me sleep. I'll come to bed soon."

"Are you okay?" He eyed her suspiciously, and Erica looked away, resenting that she felt like she had to defend herself.

"I'm fine."

"Are you sure?"

"YES. Would you go now? I'm… I'm undressed," she said in irritation.

He seemed taken aback. "I'm sorry – I just… I didn't expect you to disappear into the shower in the middle of the night. I'm worried about you."

She adjusted the towel, clutching it over her body. "Jack, I just wanted a shower. That's all. Please let me have some privacy."

He hesitated for a moment and then relented, closing the door behind him.

She exhaled slowly as he left the room. She dried herself quickly and wiped away some of the steam from the mirror so she could study her reflection. Without the aid of cosmetics, her face still looked a bit bruised on one side. Her wrists still bore angry red marks from the handcuffs. She drew in a ragged breath and closed her eyes. She wouldn't be okay until every last physical reminder of that awful ordeal was wiped away from her body.

As she reached for her nightclothes, she saw Jack's discarded white button down shirt lying on top of the hamper. She picked it up and after looking at the garment for a moment, decided to wear it instead. She buttoned the shirt and rolled up the sleeves, smiling a little to herself when she realized she could still smell his cologne on the starched fabric. Yes, this was better.

She didn't want to linger too long in the bathroom and have Jack come after her again, so she sat at her vanity table and rewrapped her sprained ankle in the wide stretchy bandage the hospital had given her. Then she applied an antibiotic cream to her wrists and bandaged them again as well. She finished with an application of her favorite night moisturizer and eye cream and regarded herself in the mirror one last time.

"You're fine. It's over. Jack is here, and you're safe," she whispered.

Erica made her way through the dark bedroom, limping to the bed. As she settled into the bed, Jack slid beside her, half asleep as he draped an arm over her. She smiled at the familiar gesture and pulled the blankets around her.

She'd hoped that cleansing her body again would wash away some of the unsettled feelings she had, and that dressing in Jack's discarded shirt would be akin to putting on a layer of emotional armor. Here in their bed, with Jack curled up behind her and his arm protectively over her, she knew she should feel safe. She should be able to drift off to sleep, but somehow it wasn't that simple.

She stared out the nearby window and the darkness beyond it for a very long time until she finally drifted off to sleep.


	31. Chapter 31

Chapter 31

David was bored out of his mind. With his shoulder injured and his arm still in a sling, he couldn't operate, so he was stuck with mundane appointments and consultations and an awful lot of free time. After several weeks of that, he was going crazy. He'd considered – more than once – checking on Erica, to see for himself that she was okay, but he didn't dare. He knew her husband was likely a constant presence, rarely leaving her side. Plus Bianca had flown in from Paris with Miranda, and he didn't want to interrupt Erica's time with her daughter and granddaughter. He figured he was still persona non grata in the Kane-Montgomery family over the Miranda mess, so was probably better off keeping his distance while Bianca was in town. Plus he'd been such a jackass to Erica when she'd come to see him in the hospital, so he figured he didn't really have any right to check on her now.

He'd just given up on finding anything worth watching on television when he heard a knock at the door. He was bored, but definitely not in the mood for company. He grumbled to himself as he got up from the sofa and answered the door.

Standing in front of him with a very uncertain expression on her face was Erica Kane.

"How is your shoulder?" she asked by way of greeting.

He shrugged, still stunned that she was standing there. "It's okay. Getting better. How are you?"

She hesitated. "May I come in?"

He stepped back and held open the door. "Of course. Please. You know you're always welcome here. Thanks for knocking this time."

She looked up in surprise and then a glimmer of recognition flashed across her face. "I won't break any windows this time," she offered.

"That would be nice," he said gruffly.

He closed the door behind her and smiled to himself as she wrinkled her nose in distaste at the cowhide rug on the floor. Apparently the more things changed, the more they stayed the same.

"How's your ankle?"

The both looked down at her feet. Her left ankle was wrapped in an ace bandage.

"I think that's the first time I've ever seen you wear something other than heels," he said, motioning to the silver flats she had on.

She smiled in response and sat down on the leather sofa. "It's getting better. I'll be back in Louboutins soon."

David sat down as well, but neither of them spoke. Finally curiosity got the better of him. "Not that I don't welcome your presence, but why are you here?"

"Still just as hospitable as ever, aren't you David," she said with an amused shake of her head.

Then she bit her bottom lip for a second and hesitated.

"I guess… I just needed to see you," she said.

"Erica, what's really going on? You're holding back. Come on, you can tell me anything, you know that," he said.

"I can't sleep. I try, but every time I close my eyes, I see him, David. I see Jonathan Kinder on top of me, about to…," her voice trailed off and a pained expression crossed her face. David took that in and wondered if she just didn't like to use the word 'rape' or if even saying it was that upsetting to her.

"Or I see the look on his face when I shot him. Or the way his blood soaked through my clothes. I killed a man." Her voice broke on that last sentence.

"Yes, you did kill a man. You killed a man who physically and emotionally abused you, a man who hit you so hard he fractured a bone in your face. You killed a man who tried to rape you, who WOULD have raped you if he'd had the chance," David said, noting the way she flinched at the world 'rape.' "Erica, you acted in self-defense, and you have no reason to feel guilty for that."

Her eyes met his for a moment. "I don't feel guilty," she whispered. "It felt… good. It felt right. In that moment, I felt strong."

He took that in. "And that scares you, doesn't it?" he asked.

She nodded.

"I think it's totally normal to feel that way. I mean, you experienced a traumatic rape when you were barely a teenager, and you weren't able to stop it. Your daughter was raped, and there was nothing you could do to prevent her from suffering as you did. Someone was about to violate you again, and you were able to act in self-defense, to stop him before he could hurt you anymore," David said in a compassionate voice.

Erica shook her head. "The only reason I wasn't… raped," she hesitated over the word but finally said it, "Is because you showed up and stopped him. The only reason I had access to that gun is because you brought it with you. I did feel strong in that moment when I pulled the trigger, but that's the only time I've felt strong since this all began."

"I think you're selling yourself short," David said supportively. "Erica Kane is a force to be reckoned with."

"Maybe," she said. "But I don't feel that way anymore. I used to, but not since, well, not since all of this happened. Sometimes I feel like the old Erica is gone."

"Have you talked to Jack about this?" he asked. He wanted to help her, but he wasn't sure why she was talking to him about this instead of her husband. Hell, he wasn't really even sure why she'd want to see his face given their history and after he snapped at her in the hospital in New Hampshire.

Erica sighed and looked away.

"Jack doesn't get it?" David asked.

"It's not that he doesn't get it – sometimes I think he understands it all too well - he just deals with it differently than I do," Erica said.

"How is he handling it?"

"He thinks… he wanted to schedule therapy sessions for me before we even left the hospital in New Hampshire, like I'm so incredibly broken that I can't even get settled back in at home before I need to see a shrink" she said with a frown on her face.

"Well, it sounds like he's worried about you, and really Erica, at some point counseling might not be a bad idea," David said, silently cursing himself for defending Jackson Montgomery. There was certainly no love lost between him and Erica's current husband, but if he had to be totally honest with himself, he'd long thought Erica could benefit from therapy.

"At some point. Not before I've even had a chance to get out of the hospital. That's not all, either," she admitted.

"So what else?"

"He thinks that I should use my fame and what happened to me for some greater good." The scowl on her face made it clear to David that she thought this was a bad idea.

"What does he think you should do?"

"Apparently Jonathan Kinder was released from prison because of overcrowding and budget cuts. Budget cuts! Can you believe that? A dangerous man was set free, and I had to suffer because of it! So Jack thinks we should go to Harrisburg to lobby the Governor and the state legislature to increase funding for the Department of Corrections, and that we should lobby for some sort of requirement that violent criminals can't be released until their sentence is fully served," she said.

David nodded. Based on what he knew about Erica's husband, that sounded like something he'd do. It was a fairly noble and honorable thing to want to do. David knew it wasn't anything he'd ever do.

"He shouldn't have been released," David agreed. "But he didn't have a sentence of life without parole, right?"

Erica looked up at him in surprise. "No, I guess not."

"So he would have been released at some point anyway."

"What's your point?" she asked in irritation.

"He planned this, and he spent a long time doing it. Who's to say the same thing wouldn't have happened five or ten years from now after he'd served his entire sentence?" David asked.

Erica was taken aback. "I… I don't know. I never thought about it that way."

She bit her bottom lip for a moment. "That's a really depressing thought – that I was doomed to be kidnapped and violated like that, no matter what."

David tried to backtrack. He hadn't meant to hurt her by saying that. "Erica I didn't mean…damn."

He sighed and tried again. "I just meant that for a sociopath like Jonathan Kinder, I'm not sure that lobbying for increased prison funding and a 'no parole for violent offenders' law would really have prevented this. I didn't mean to imply that you were destined to be attacked no matter what, just that I'm not sure this change in the law Jack wants would really be the solution he thinks it is."

He paused for a moment. "But it doesn't matter what I think. You don't seem to want to join this lobbying crusade," he said.

She shook her head vehemently. "Absolutely not. I have no desire to publicize what happened to me. I don't want to give interviews about it. Some of the news stories already written about my kidnapping mention that I was raped before, that my daughter was raped, and I don't want any more publicity about that. That's not good for me or for Kendall or for Bianca. I don't want to walk the halls of the state capitol telling people over and over again how I was abused and violated. I've already axed suggestions from my producers to do episodes of "New Beginnings" about my experience or anything remotely related to it."

"Let me guess: Jack was a problem with that," David said as he leaned back against the leather sofa.

"He thinks I'm avoiding dealing with everything that happened," Erica said.

"Are you?"

Her eyes flashed in anger at him for a moment and then softened. "Maybe. I don't know. Both of us just want everything to go back to the way it was before, but I don't think that's possible. I'm trying. I go to the studio. I produce new episodes of my show. I come home and try not to think about how I was attacked in my own house. I have dinner with my husband and his children. But it doesn't feel like me. I feel like I'm just going through the motions."

"You were kidnapped from you own home, Erica, a place where you should feel safe. Now you're back living in that same house. That's got to affect your overall sense of well-being," David observed. "Have you considered moving? Maybe starting over in a new house?"

Erica shook her head. "It IS a new house. We'd only just barely moved in when this happened. Moving would make zero financial sense. Plus there's no way Jack would ever agree to uproot Lily like that. She doesn't handle change very well."

"So what? What do YOU need? Does staying in that house upset you?" he asked, amazed that Erica would put her stepdaughter's comfort ahead of her own.

Erica looked away and was silent for a moment. "The other day I was coming down the stairs when the doorbell rang. It was a UPS delivery man, dropping off a package, some video game Reggie had ordered online. I heard the doorbell, I looked over and saw the delivery man, and I froze, David. He could see me through the door, and he waved to me, trying to get me to answer the door. I just stood there. My heart was racing. My chest and my throat got so tight I could barely breathe. I wanted to run and hide but I couldn't move. In my head I KNEW that it wasn't Jonathan, that he's dead, but I was still terrified. Everything in me was screaming "Run! Hide!" Thank God Reggie was home to open the door because I couldn't function again until the delivery man was gone."

"That sounds like a panic attack. Does that happen often?" David asked.

"Yes," she admitted, her face reddening in embarrassment over this admission. "Any time someone comes to the door. Any time I'm in the house alone."

"Does Jack know this?"

She shook her head. "I know Reggie told him about the episode with the delivery man, but I've tried to hide the other, um, panic attacks."

"Why would you do that?" he asked, genuinely curious.

"Because he'd insist that I need therapy, that I need help, and he wouldn't mean to, but he'd make me feel like I'm damaged," she said. "He's already paranoid that the stress of the kidnapping and the drugs I was given are going to lead to a relapse and that I'll turn to alcohol or painkillers."

David frowned. In truth, he'd been worried about the possibility of a relapse as well. "How do you feel about that? Do you feel tempted?"

Erica shook her head vehemently. "At one time, I would have welcomed that blurring of the edges that comes with alcohol, but after being drugged against my will, I'm terrified of feeling like that, of feeling like I don't have control of myself. I don't want to ever feel like that again."

David thought about it for a moment. "I'm glad that you aren't tempted to drink, but I think staying in that house may not be a good idea right now. Why don't you check into the Valley Inn or something? Give yourself some space."

"To be honest, I've thought about doing just that, but…" she blushed, "I don't want to be alone. What if I had a panic attack every time room service knocked on the door?"

"So go stay with Kendall. Or Opal. Or Myrtle. Just get out of the house."

"I… I couldn't burden them like that."

"Erica, they're your family and your friends. I doubt they'd think of you as a burden," David said.

"David, I wake up screaming from nightmares. I panic when I'm alone. I… I don't want my daughter or my friends…"

"You don't want them to see you like that and think of you as weak," he finished for her.

The corners of her mouth turned up slightly. He wouldn't call it a smile, but at least it wasn't a sad look. "You always did know me so well."

He nodded and smiled back. An idea was tumbling around in his head. It was a bad idea. He shouldn't even think it much less consider suggesting it. No good could come from it, he told himself. But on the other hand, if it helped Erica, that would be good, wouldn't it? Erica feeling like herself again would be worth it, despite the enormous potential minefields it would create. No, no it was a bad idea. He shouldn't even bring it up.

"Well, you did once say we were so alike it was scary. You know, if you think it would help, you could stay here," he blurted out.


	32. Chapter 32

Chapter 32

She stared at him, her eyes wide with surprise. "What?"

He swallowed hard. He wasn't entirely sure he'd meant to say that aloud.

"You could stay here, in the guest room. Just until you feel like yourself again."

She blinked a few times but didn't speak. David was silently cursing himself for even suggesting it. How stupid could he possibly be?

"You think I should stay here?" she asked.

He leaned back against the sofa and tried to act casual. "Sure. I mean, I can't operate right now, so I'm at home a lot. You wouldn't be alone, but you wouldn't have the chaos of a bunch of teenagers in the house, and you could just focus on you. In fact if you stayed here, you could drive me to the hospital on days when the weather is bad and I don't trust myself to drive with one arm."

"So I'd be helping you too?"

Well, she wasn't laughing at him or outright rejecting idea, which shocked him.

"Yeah, you would. Plus, well, frankly Erica, I was there, in the cabin. I saw what Kinder was doing to you," he said quietly. "You wouldn't have to hide anything from me or pretend that everything is fine. If you need to fall apart, you can do it here, and you don't have to explain anything. I'm not going to judge you in any way."

She closed her eyes for a moment. "You've certainly seen me at my worst."

"I've seen you vulnerable and hurt, whether it was because of Kinder or because of me and the accident I caused."

Subconsciously she touched her hand to her cheek, where she'd previously been scarred. She had a faraway look in her eyes, and he wasn't sure if she was thinking about the accident, the kidnapping, their time in the basement or something else entirely.

She stood up and walked away from him for a moment, seemingly gazing out the window into the woods beyond his deck. She was quiet for a moment and David wasn't sure what to say. Betrayal was clear on her face when she turned back around.

"Why didn't you tell me that you knew Jonathan Kinder? WHY? Don't you think I had a right to know?" she asked.

David sighed. He should have known to expect this conversation.

"You're right – in light of everything that happened, yes, you had a right to know," he conceded, "But come on Erica, when was I supposed to tell you that?"

"WHEN? I don't know David, sometime before he kidnapped me, before he took me forcibly from my home and, and, did such horrible things to me would have been nice!" she shot back.

"What would that have accomplished? Come on Erica, I want to know! Before I showed up in New Hampshire, I hadn't seen Jonathan Kinder since medical school! What exactly would you have gained from knowing that years ago we shared some classes and the same circle of friends?" he asked.

"I had a right to know! You read my books, you KNEW the role he played in my addiction!" she said in an accusing voice.

"Yeah, I did know," he admitted, "But again, what good would it have done? I read your books because I was falling for you and wanted to know more about you. How would you have reacted when we were dating if I'd told you that I knew him? Would you have trusted me? Or would you have assumed I was just like him?"

David noted that she hesitated, and that hurt. No, she wouldn't have trusted him. She'd had enough trouble trusting him without the Kinder factor, he thought.

Erica tilted her head for a moment as she studied him.

"That's how you knew, isn't it?" she asked suddenly.

"Knew what?"

"Where I was. The cabin in New Hampshire. That's how you knew where to find me – because you knew Jonathan," she said slowly.

David ran his fingers through his hair. "Yeah, that's how I knew. I'd been there before, in med school. It was just a weekend trip with some friends."

Erica sat back down with a stunned look on her face.

"I didn't tell you before that I knew Jonathan Kinder because I didn't think any good could come of it. He was in jail, you were sober, and I thought mentioning a long ago acquaintance would only hurt you," he admitted. "There was nothing there to conceal. I went to London after med school to do my residency, we lost contact, and that was it. I had no idea you had any connection to him at all until I read your books."

She was quiet, and he wasn't sure what to say next. His offer to let her stay here with him still hung unanswered in the air, but he assumed it was as good as dismissed.

"Look, if you don't want to stay here, I won't take it personally. I know we weren't exactly getting along before you were kidnapped and that you'll hate me forever because of Miranda."

"Bianca and Miranda left again for Paris yesterday. I miss them already," she said wistfully. "Miranda is growing up so fast. She's so beautiful and such a good baby."

"And in spite of everything, you're madly in love with that little girl, aren't you?" he asked with a light laugh.

She smiled too. "I am. I guess despite everything, and despite the anger I still have over what you and Krystal did, I am glad that you helped Bianca with the pregnancy, and I'm glad that Miranda is here and that she's part of my family."

"Another strong Kane woman," David observed.

Erica's smile faded. "Maybe she will be, but I certainly don't feel very strong."

"You will. You'll get better. It's just going to take some time and maybe some distance," he said. "Which brings me back to my offer: do you want to stay here?"

She hesitated but seemed to be thinking it over. David held his breath and tried to keep his expression casual. He realized to his surprise that he suddenly really wanted her to say yes, but at the same time he feared that if she did say yes, it would somehow blow up in his face and make her hate him even more.

"Jack is supposed to take Lily to an autism conference in New York next week. If Reggie stayed with a friend, then maybe I could stay here while Jack is out of town, sort of on a trial basis to see if I do better away from the house," she said slowly. "Would that be okay with you?"

"Yeah, that's fine," David said, trying to hide his shock that she would actually even give the offer serious consideration. He was so surprised that he almost missed the other part of her comment.

"Wait a minute - I just want to get this straight: after everything that happened, your husband is leaving you to go to some autism conference?" David asked, his eyes narrowing.

"Jack and Lily have planned this trip for a really long time, and it's very important to both of them. I mean, he did offer to cancel the trip, but I didn't want to disappoint Lily or make him worry about you."

"You need to stop thinking about what's best for everyone else and start thinking about what's best for YOU," he replied.

"I am," she said. "I'm coming to stay here, aren't I?"

He smiled at that. He couldn't help himself. "Yes, you are."

Dear God, what had he just gotten himself into?


	33. Chapter 33

Chapter 33

Several days later, Lily and Jack headed to New York, and Erica prepared to send Reggie to a friend's house so she could stay with David.

"You know, Erica, I don't have to hang with the guys. I can hang here with you, ya know?" Reggie offered.

She smiled at her stepson. "I know Reggie, and I appreciate your offer to, um, 'hang,' I really do. I think I just need to get out of the house for a little bit," Erica said. "And I don't need a babysitter. You'll have more fun with your friends anyway."

"Okay, okay, well if you change your mind and get tired of staying with Opal, lemme know, k?" he said as he loaded Erica's suitcases into her car.

"I will. Thank you. Please call my cell phone if you need anything, otherwise I'll see you when Jack and Lily get back on Sunday," she said. "Are you sure you don't want me to drop you off at school? It's on the way to the studio."

"Nah, I'm cool. I can take the bus. Later, E!" he said, leaning in to give her a kiss on the cheek. She felt somewhat guilty about abandoning Reggie for a few days, but he'd seemed thrilled at the prospect of spending several days with his friends. She just hoped he'd show up for school and behave himself as well as he'd promised her he would.

She watched her stepson leave for school, and then she locked the front door and left for the studio, and after that for David's house.

On the way to David's home that evening, Erica found herself feeling torn about the entire situation. She pulled over more than once and sat in her car on the side of the road, debating whether she should just turn around and drive to Opal's instead. This was David Hayward. She was actually going to go stay overnight – for several nights – with David. In his house. Alone. This was insane. She hated him for what he'd done to Bianca, but at the same time, she owed him her life and what was left of her sanity.

In the end, pride was what made her pull the car back onto the road and continue the drive to David's home. She wasn't willing to turn around like a coward and show up on Opal's doorstep in need of a babysitter, and she wasn't willing to admit to David that she was concerned about being alone with him for several days.

In truth, she was more afraid that even she wanted to admit. He'd come for her, he'd rescued her, and the man who'd showed up in that cabin in New Hampshire bore all the marks of the man with whom she'd fallen in love years ago. The man who'd never really left her life. The man with whom she'd never really had real closure. The man she would have married if circumstances had been just a little bit different.

She loved Jack, she was happy with Jack, she told herself firmly, and Jack loved and adored her, so there was no reason to be afraid of being alone with David Hayward.

He was waiting for her on the front porch when she drove up.

"Aren't you going to help me unload my luggage?" she asked David with a smile as she stepped out of the car.

"I do have an injured arm here," he teased as he followed her to her car, watching as she opened the trunk.

"Um, Erica, I thought you were staying for a couple of days," he said, studying the contents of her trunk.

She smiled brightly at him. "I am. This is everything I need for a few days."

He shook his head and fought back a laugh at her inability to pack lightly before he grabbed a suitcase with his good hand and led her into the guest room.

He actually did laugh once all of her bags were in the tiny guest room. "I hope you weren't planning to walk around in here."

She shrugged. "I'll manage. So what is the plan for my stay here, doctor?"

"First things first, does Jackson know you're here?"

"No," she said flatly.

"Uh huh…and where does he think you are?" He had wondered for days what she was planning to tell her husband, but he'd avoided asking for fear that she'd reconsider staying with him.

"At Opal's."

"And where does Opal think you are?"

"As far as Opal knows, I'm sitting at home with Reggie and Coral," she said with a shrug.

"Where is Reggie?"

"With friends. He thinks I'm at Opal's too," Erica said lightly.

"So what are you planning to do if Jackson or Reggie calls Opal?" David asked, genuinely curious about her response.

Erica shrugged again. "They won't. There's no reason to. They both know the easiest way to reach me is via cell phone."

"What if Opal calls you?" David asked.

She rolled her eyes. "Really, David, you're acting like we're carrying on some illicit affair and at risk of getting caught doing something wrong. I'm just staying here. There's nothing untoward going on. It's an experiment to see if I can cope better when I'm staying somewhere else but not alone. It's a form of therapy really. Jack can hardly complain about me seeking help after everything that happened."

David raised an eyebrow. He had a feeling Jack wouldn't see it quite the same way. Nevertheless, he dropped the subject after that and left her to unpack and settle in. He was oddly pleased with himself that she was actually here, that she trusted him enough to stay here but he was a little worried that she'd been less than honest with her family about where she'd be for the next few days. Then again, if Jack had known she'd planned to come here, he probably wouldn't have left town.

David was in the kitchen making dinner when Erica finally emerged from the guest room.

"I'd offer to help, but…" she started.

"But we'd both prefer that you not burn down my house," he laughed. "Actually, you can help with this. I'm just making pizza."

She raised an eyebrow. "Pizza? How gourmet of you."

"Hey, if you want gourmet, go stay at the Valley Inn. This is Chez Hayward, and we're a bit more casual here," he laughed.

"Seriously though, you'll love this. I get the dough premade from this great Italian place in Center City, so all I have to do is roll out the dough, put on sauce and toppings, and bake, and it's to die for," he promised her.

"So what do you want me to do?" she asked as she watched him arrange the dough on a pizza stone.

"I'll put the sauce on it, and then you can add toppings. Do you think you can handle that?" he teased.

"I don't know – do I have to chop up vegetables or anything?" she asked with a laugh.

"Nope. Already done," he said gesturing to containers of cheese, pepperoni, and chopped vegetables. "You just need to decorate the pizza."

"Oh. Well, that's not really cooking. That's just decorating. I can decorate," she said with a slight smile as she joined in him the kitchen.

Erica expected her stay with David to be awkward and uncomfortable. It was one of the reasons she'd reconsidered staying there in the first place. There were so many things left unsaid between them, and she was worried they'd both spend hours sitting in awkward silence. To her surprise, the stay was off to a more comfortable start than she'd envisioned. They had pizza together, and David made her admit that so far, the cuisine at Chez Hayward wasn't all that bad.

David wanted to ask her about Bianca – did she like Paris? Was living overseas working well for her? How was Miranda doing? Was she saying any words in French yet? He didn't though because he was afraid that would inevitably result in them arguing over what he and Krystal had done, and the last thing he wanted was to fight with Erica. So he steered the conversation to safer topics like her television show, asking plenty of open-ended questions that allowed her to talk about her ideas for the show, what she loved about working in television, and anything else innocuous he could think of to ask.

Once dinner was finished and the kitchen cleaned up, Erica looked at him expectantly.

"What now?" she asked.

He ran his fingers through his hair. "What now? I didn't know I had to actively entertain you," he said with a shrug.

She seemed momentarily taken aback. "Oh, well, no I didn't expect you to entertain me… I don't want to get in the way of your plans and your normal routine. I can always go to my room and read a book or something," she said as she retreated from the room.

Damn. That wasn't what he'd intended at all.

"Erica – wait!" he reached out and put a hand on her arm, stopping her before she could leave the room. "I was just… Please, don't feel like you have to go hide in your room. To be honest, I don't have any plans at all. If you weren't here, I'd probably sit down in front of the television and watch a basketball game or something."

"Oh. Well, I guess I could watch basketball with you, if you don't mind," she said.

"Okay, um, well, I'll see what's on," he said as he looked for the television remote.

"That's the sport where they run around the bases, right?" she asked.

He turned and stared at her, dumbfounded.

"I'm kidding David, I'm kidding," she said with a laugh. "Believe it or not, I do know about more than just beauty and fashion."

She shook her head at him in amusement. "I'm going to go change into something more comfortable. I'll be back in a minute."

She returned to the living room a half an hour later, completely barefaced and dressed in a loose-fitting pair of soft gray matte jersey pants with a matching top. David wasn't sure if they were supposed to be pajamas or Erica's version of casual clothes, but he was afraid to ask. Her feet were bare minus the ace bandage around her ankle.

"I'd forgotten that your idea of "in a minute" is always longer than mine," he teased when she sat down on the sofa, curling her legs underneath her.

She ran her fingers through her hair and smiled at him. "I know it's early, but I haven't slept well in weeks, so I wanted to get ready for bed just in case."

"In case the combination of basketball and my stellar personality aren't enough to keep you awake?" he finished for her.

"Something like that."

They made casual conversation as the game continued, but David noticed that Erica seemed to gradually shift into more of a reclining position as the night progressed. He reached over with his good arm and tossed a throw pillow at her, startling her in the process.

"What was that for?" she asked in surprise.

"That's for you. You might as well get comfortable," he said. "I can sit over here so you can stretch out," he offered as he got up from the sofa.

When he looked over at her again, she was sound asleep on the sofa.

David waited until the game was over, and then he carefully draped a blanket over Erica. He double-checked the doors to make sure they were locked, and then he set the security alarm, switched off the television and gave Erica one last look before he switched off the lights and went to bed.


	34. Chapter 34

Chapter 34

It was dark and cold. Her body ached, and it wouldn't cooperate with her. She wanted to run, but her legs wouldn't move. She had to move, she had to run or he would hurt her. She had to escape, no matter what. She opened her mouth to scream.

"NO!"

Erica bolted upright on the sofa, gasping for breath. She looked around the dark and unfamiliar room in confusion, trying to get her bearings.

"Erica! Are you okay?"

She startled at his words as David rushed into the living room. Then it all came back to her. She was at David's home. She was safe. It was just a dream, just a nightmare. Just a horrible, awful nightmare.

She brushed her hair away from her face, noting with dismay that her skin felt cold and clammy.

David switched on a nearby table lamp and sat down on the edge of the sofa facing her. "Erica?" he asked gently. "Did you have a nightmare?"

She nodded mutely.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked in a cautious voice.

She rubbed her eyes for a moment, as if trying to erase the images from her nightmare. She didn't want to talk about it, but somehow words were tumbling from her mouth before she could stop them.

"I was trying to escape from the cabin. It was dark and cold and I was trying so hard to run from him. I hurt all over, and I couldn't run fast enough. I was trying so hard to run but my legs wouldn't work," she pushed out in a shaky voice.

"That must have been very scary. I think that's a pretty common phenomenon in nightmares – trying to run but not being able to," David said sympathetically.

She shook her head at him. "It wasn't just a nightmare. It was real. It happened," she whispered.

His eyes widened but he said nothing, hoping she'd continue.

"I… I tried to escape from his cabin, when I first woke up there. He just left me in that room and waited for the drugs to wear off. I made it all the way out the front door. He hurt me, when he came to my house… and I could barely walk, much less run," she whispered.

He noticed that she seemed to be focusing her eyes on his chest and not his face and that her hands trembled as she spoke. He was relieved that she was talking about the ordeal, but with each word, he wished he'd taken the time that night to beat Jonathan Kinder to a bloody pulp.

"I was trying to put my heels on and run through the snow. I had no heavy winter clothes. I didn't know where I was. I didn't even know who had abducted me at that point. I just knew that I needed to get away. And then he grabbed my wrist and pulled me back inside," she said as a single tear trailed down her cheek.

"I screamed for help, but no one heard me, no one came for me. If I could have run… if I hadn't hurt my ankle when he first attacked me, if I hadn't waited so long for the drugs to wear off, maybe… maybe I could have gotten away. Maybe I could have run fast enough and far enough to get help," she said as her voice broke.

"Erica," he said in the gentlest voice possible, "You couldn't have gotten away, not in high heels with an injured ankle in New Hampshire in the winter. I was there. The cabin was in a rural area. It's not like there were neighbors close by, and at that time of year, odds were that even the closest houses were empty cabins used mainly in the summer. You were probably miles from the nearest person who could help you, and you'd have died of hypothermia before you found help."

He wanted desperately for her to understand that she hadn't done anything wrong, that even if she'd been able to run that night, it wouldn't have ended well. It wasn't her fault that she'd been stuck there an additional few days. Nothing had been her fault.

She buried her face in her hands. "I couldn't get away, and after that, what he did…the way he hit me…" her voice trailed off.

David leaned in toward her and placed a hand on her arm. She looked up at him, her face streaked with tears.

He swallowed hard at the sight of her so upset. It was human instinct to want to comfort another person in their sorrow or their suffering. That was what he told himself as he reached for her. He couldn't just sit there and watch her cry and not do anything to try to make her feel better.

His arms immediately went around her, cradling her protectively against his chest. He thought perhaps she might push him away, but instead she scooted closer to him and let him hold her. Her sobs increased as he stroked her hair and her back and rested his cheek against her head. "You're safe now. Let it all out," he whispered to her.

She wasn't sure how long she cried against his chest, but eventually the tears stopped, and she drew in shaky breaths as she listened to the sound of his heart beating. Somewhere in the back of her mind it registered with her that he never tried to shush her or tell her that everything was fine. He was the first person who encouraged her to cry, who encouraged her to sob until there was nothing left.

She pulled back from the embrace and wiped her eyes as she looked at him. "I'm sorry."

He seemed taken aback. "For what? You don't have to apologize for anything."

She sniffled. "For waking you up, for making you listen to that, for getting your shirt all wet."

He scoffed. "You don't need to apologize for any of that. My shirt will dry, and you need to be able to talk about whatever you're feeling."

"What time is it?" she asked.

"Ah… I think around 2 am. In other words, way too early for you to get up for the day," he said.

"Do you think you can go back to sleep? Would you like me to sit with you?" he offered. "You know, just until you fall asleep?"

She smiled gratefully at him. "I'd like that. I mean, if you don't mind."

He pulled back the blanket and helped her up from the sofa before following her to the guest room. He made it about two steps into the room before he stumbled in the dark as he tripped over one of her suitcases. He cursed as he fumbled for the lamp he knew was beside the bed. When he flipped it on, he was stunned to see the mass of half-unpacked luggage laid out in the room – and Erica already sitting on the bed.

"How did you get to the bed without killing yourself?" he asked with a shake of his head.

She shrugged. "It's a gift."

She pulled back the covers and slipped into the bed. "You're sure you don't mind sitting with me? Just until I fall asleep?"

He pulled the bedding around her, tucking her in securely. "Of course not."

She watched as he slid into bed beside her, between the blanket and the quilt.

"What are you doing?" she asked in surprise, sitting up suddenly.

"I don't think it's a good idea for me to be all the way in the bed with you," he admitted before he could stop himself. "I mean, you're married, and it's… this is more appropriate."

She stared at him incredulously.

"I don't have to be under the covers at all, if that makes you uncomfortable," he offered. God, this was becoming more and more awkward with each second.

David looked around the dimly lit room.

"I'm sorry. Your clothes are on the only chair in here, so I just thought…" he said. He suddenly felt mortified that he'd just assumed she would be okay with him lying beside her on the bed. He'd offered sit with her, not lie down beside her. What the hell was wrong with him? He stood up quickly and tried to clear a path to chair on the other side of the small room.

"No, no, don't be silly. I'm fine. I just… I don't want you to be uncomfortable. You've already been so kind to me, David. I really don't deserve this," she said.

"Why don't you let me be the judge of that?" he said as he moved an upholstered arm chair and positioned it beside the bed.

She watched as he sat down in the chair.

"You're literally going to just sit there?" she asked.

"Yeah," he said. "I mean, I offered."

She eyed him suspiciously but then fluffed the pillows and reclined in the bed.

David leaned forward and turned off the light.

"Good night," he said softly.

Silence filled the small guest room, and he attempted to make himself comfortable in the chair. He wondered how long he'd have to wait for her to fall asleep and whether he could navigate around her luggage to get out of the room without waking her up.

What the hell was he doing? This entire situation was utterly absurd. He couldn't believe he'd been insane enough to ask Erica to stay here with him. Getting her out of her house, out of the very place where she was violently attached and kidnapped seemed like a logical solution to her problems, but he realized as he sat there in the darkness that he had no idea what the next step should be.

Now Erica was here, he had no idea what he was supposed to do with her. She'd even warned him, told him that she woke up screaming in fear from nightmares that kept her from sleeping. He'd shrugged it off as something he could easily handle, but now he wasn't so sure. Hell, he wasn't sure why he'd even made this his problem. Erica had a husband who should be taking care of her right now. This wasn't his job – this was Jack's responsibility, and for the life of him, David couldn't figure out why he'd volunteered for this task.

He wasn't sure how long he'd sat there silently in the dark, stewing over this entire messed up situation when he heard Erica's voice.

"David? Are you still awake?"

He sat up straighter in the uncomfortable chair. "Yeah. What's wrong?"

"I can't sleep like this," she said. His eyes had adjusted to the darkness enough that he could see her sit up in the bed.

"Why not?" he asked.

"You're staring at me," she said in irritation.

"Wasn't that the point? That I'd sit up with you until you went back to sleep?" he asked in confusion.

"I can't go to sleep with you staring at me like that," she said.

He tilted his head back in the chair and closed his eyes in frustration.

"You want me to stay with you until you go to sleep, but you don't want me to be next to you on the bed, and now you want me to sit beside you but not look at you. Erica, it is after 2 o'clock in the morning. We both have to work tomorrow, and I'm tired. Just tell me what you want me to do so we can both get some sleep," he said. His voice came out harsher than he intended, and he felt bad about that when he heard her suck in a sharp breath.

"Just go," she said bitterly. "You obviously don't want to be here, and I don't need you."

"That's not what I meant, and you know it," he retorted.

"This was your idea! My staying here was all your idea, and now you don't want me here," she said in a hurt voice.

"No, that's not true," he said quickly as she moved toward him. Before he could react, she attempted to slid out of bed and move past him, but as she did, she tripped over his feet in the dark.

"Erica! Jesus! What the hell are you doing?" he gasped as he caught her before she could fall.

"I'm leaving!"

"At this hour? Don't be ridiculous," he said.

She jerked away from him. "It was a mistake for me to come here."

He leaned past her and turned on the lamp.

"No it wasn't. You weren't afraid here. You went to sleep here."

"And I had a nightmare here, and now you want me to leave," she said.

David threw up his hands in frustration. "NO ERICA. I do NOT want you to leave!" he said in exasperation. "I want you to get back into the bed and lie down and go to sleep."

She bit her bottom lip and eyed him suspiciously. "You don't want me to leave?"

"No."

"Are you just saying that because it's 2 am?"

He sighed. "No. No I don't."

He turned the chair to face the doorway and then moved her luggage so he had a clear path to the door. "You can go to sleep, and I'll sit here until you fall asleep, just like I offered."

He walked past her and sat down in the chair, his back to her.

She was silent for a moment, and behind him he could hear her moving the bedding around.

"David, don't be ridiculous," she said.

"What?" he asked as he turned to look at her.

"There's no reason for you to just sit there," she said with a roll of her eyes as she scooted toward the wall and the far end of the bed.

She'd pulled the top quilt off the bed and placed it in a heap on the outer side of the bed.

"I can sleep over here, under the blankets, and you can be on that side of the bed with the quilt, at least until I fall asleep," she said. "We're both mature adults. I want to go back to sleep, I'm sure you want to go back to sleep, and I can't sleep with you just sitting there."

"The way I sit disturbs you?" he said in amusement.

"Shut up and just get in the bed," she said in irritation.

He shook his head at her in amazement. He had absolutely no idea how he got into conversations like this with her. All he knew is that they'd go round and round until he was completely lost. No wonder Erica had had such success in business – if she talked in circles to her suppliers and her competitors the way she did with him, those poor bastards probably agreed to anything she wanted.

He moved the chair away and then got into the bed, arranging the quilt around him. Erica was so far on the opposite side of the bed that she was practically against the wall. Still, for good measure, he made sure he was on the edge of his side of the bed with plenty of space between them.

"I don't know how you can go from being so nice to being so… so incredibly obnoxious in the span of a few minutes," she said.

"Shut up and just go to sleep," he shot back, paraphrasing her earlier comment.

"You're much nicer when you don't talk," she retorted, narrowing her eyes at him in annoyance.

"So are you," he said as he flipped off the light. "Go back to sleep."

She sputtered wordlessly in irritation but didn't respond. That alone amazed David. Erica let him have the last word? That was practically unheard of.

He stared up at the ceiling in the darkness for a long time, listening to the rhythmic sound of her breathing. He wasn't sure how long it took her to go back to sleep, but he knew he should get up and go back to his own bed.

He turned to glance at her in the darkness, to reassure himself that she really was asleep. It was a bad move, one he'd regret, because it instantly took him back to all of those nights so long ago when he'd laid beside her in bed and watched her sleep, enjoying how peaceful she looked at rest and marveling that this glorious woman was really his. His heart lurched at the memory, and he shook his head in the dark. Erica wasn't his. She never had been. Hell, Erica wasn't anyone's really. She was just Erica, and right now she was happily married to someone else and struggling to cope with a violent attack. He owed it to her to help her get through this ordeal and get her life back on track. The last thing she needed right now was for him to be distracted by memories of the past. Anything between them was gone a long time ago, and that's how it would always stay.

David closed his eyes then and drifted off to sleep as well.


	35. Chapter 35

Chapter 35

David was awakened a few hours later by the incessant buzzing of the alarm clock on Erica's cell phone – and by Erica reaching over him to grab the phone. He blinked his eyes and looked down at her as she fumbled with the buttons on the phone. His arm was around her, and she was curled up next to him. How did that happen? When did that happen?

She shut off the alarm and then looked up at him, her eyes wide with horror. She sat up immediately, pushing herself away from him.

If he wasn't awake already, he sure was now. David rubbed his eyes and sat up as well.

"What time is it?" he asked.

She moved further away from him with an expression of mild panic on her face.

"6 am," she said as she moved further away from him and slid off the end of the end.

He groaned. God, that was early.

"Sorry," she breathed out. "I didn't mean to wake you up. I just… I need to get up and get dressed."

She sat up quickly, moving away from him.

"How did you sleep?" he asked, trying to ignore the way she'd recoiled from him.

"Okay. No more nightmares."

"That's good. I'm glad," he said sincerely.

"I…I should go take a shower and get dressed. I'm sorry you had to deal with… _that… _last night. I appreciate you staying with me last night," she said formally, "but it won't be necessary again."

David raised an eyebrow at the tone of her voice. It was obvious she was upset that they woke up in the same bed together. He should have just gone back to his own bed last night. No, nothing untoward had happened, nor would it, but still, it was inappropriate. It was odd though that she was handling this in such a formal and distant way. This was Erica Kane – he expected her to yell and throw things.

He offered her what he hoped was a friendly smile. "You don't have to apologize. I offered to let you stay here. Like therapy, remember?"

She stood stiffly beside one of her suitcases, her arms folded around herself. He felt bad that she looked so uncomfortable. That certainly had never been his intention.

"Rather unconventional therapy, wouldn't you say?" she asked wryly.

He grinned. "You're the one who won't go see a real therapist," he reminded her. "Besides, it's kind of nice having someone else around. Distracts me from the whole 'Dr. Death' routine you loathe so much."

Erica opened her mouth as if to respond, but seemed to think better of it and instead shook her head slightly. He assumed she was recalling her visit to his home after Miranda's safe return when she'd come make a bargain with him: his home saved from demolition and permanently established as a historical site if he'd share with Erica where Liza had taken Adam's daughter, Colby. 'Spare me the Dr. Death routine David, I've seen it all already,' she'd told him.

"So what is your plan for the day, Dr. Hayward," Erica asked as she bent to sort through her luggage.

David stretched fully this time and yawned. "If you're going into town to go to the studio, I could use a ride to the hospital. I have some work I can do there, and it's supposed to snow later today, so I'd rather not drive myself."

"You want me to drop you off at the hospital?" she asked, suddenly straightening up and turning to him with a funny look on her face.

"Yeah, you said you wouldn't mind doing that if you stayed here" he reminded her.

She clutched a dress to her chest. "Well, what if someone sees us together? I mean both of us in my car?"

He laughed at her. "Like you said, it's not like we're carrying on an illicit affair, Erica. You're giving me a ride to work because I can't drive myself. I'm highly amused that you aren't worried about a family member calling Opal looking for you, but you are worried that some random stranger will see us in the same vehicle together."

She bit her bottom lip for a moment and considered his words.

"You can drop me off in the back where the delivery trucks unload if you want," he teased her.

"Well, maybe I can wear a disguise or something," she said as she turned on her heel and headed for the bathroom. He had no idea whether or not she was serious.

She did indeed drop him off at the hospital that morning, near the loading dock for the cafeteria, probably as a way to torment him, he figured as he watched her drive off. He shook his head slightly as he went inside, ignoring the confused glances from cafeteria staff. Life with Erica was certainly never dull.

Erica spent the day at the television studio, producing another episode of "New Beginnings," but her heart wasn't in it. She still felt like she was just going through the motions. Jack called to check on her from New York, and she reassured him that she was just fine, even though she didn't feel fine. David, to his credit, did not call to check up on her, but he did message her once in the afternoon to ask what time she would be back by the hospital to get him and to ask whether he should wait by the loading dock in disguise.

She laughed at his message, the first real laugh she'd laughed in days. Despite the nightmare and her middle of the night crying session in David's arms, she'd also slept better last night than she had in weeks. She found herself looking forward to the end of the workday and the evening she'd spend with David. Thus far, she'd been more introspective and honest with him than she'd intended to be. She didn't like talking about the abduction or the violent attacks she'd suffered at the hands of Jonathan Kinder, but for some reason, she found it easy to talk to David. Maybe he was right, maybe his presence at Kinder's cabin made it easier to talk to him about the whole experience. As much as the idea surprised her, she was beginning to think that perhaps David could be good for her.


	36. Chapter 36

Chapter 36

Erica sat impatiently in her car near the hospital's loading dock, waiting for David. It was starting to snow, and she was anxious to get back to his cabin before the roads became coated with snow and ice. Sitting by herself, watching the snowflakes land on her windshield reminded her a little too much of the way the snowflakes had swirled around her that night when David carried her out of the prison Jonathan Kinder had made for her.

The ring of her cell phone distracted her momentarily from the bad memories. She glanced down at the phone and answered it. "Hey Reggie, whassup?" she asked lightly.

"Good job, E! Whazzup?" he said with a laugh.

"Not much. How are you doing? How was school?" she asked, praying he didn't want to come over to Opal's to see her.

"It's cool. I'm just hanging out with my friend Marcus, playing video games and shit. I mean stuff."

Erica smiled into the phone.

"Are you checking up on me?" she asked.

"Naw, I wouldn't do something like that. I mean, you're Erica Kane. You don't need a babysitter or nothing. I just wanted to say 'hey' and find out what time J and Lily are coming back," he said, somewhat embarrassed that she'd realized right away that he was, in fact, checking up on her.

"Oh, um, they should be home by 6pm on Sunday. I'll be home before then, of course," Erica said smoothly.

"Do you want me to come home early then, on Sunday to hang out with you?" he asked.

"No, oh Reggie, that's very sweet of you to offer, but that's okay. I'll probably spend most of the weekend working at the office, catching up on some things," she said.

"Okay. Well, if you change your mind, I can come home earlier," he offered.

"No, no, don't worry about me, Reggie," Erica said as she switched on the windshield wipers to clear the snow. "Listen, do me a favor Reggie."

"Anything."

"Stay off the roads," she said. "I'm leaving the studio now, and they're starting to get slick. We're supposed to get quite a bit of snow tonight, and I know Jack would feel much better if he knew you were indoors and safe and sound. I realize that's a lot to ask a teenage boy on a Friday night, but do this for me, okay?"

"Erica, you're killing me. There's this girl Marcus wants to meet up with tonight –"

"Reggie…" she said in a warning voice.

"Yeah, yeah, anything for you, E," he grumbled. "See ya later."

"Bye Reggie," she said as she hung up the phone, her stepmother duties complete. She was relieved that he wasn't planning to push her about the time she was spending away from the house.

David tapped on the passenger side window a few moments later and smiled at her as she unlocked the car door.

"What? No disguise?" she said sarcastically as he slid into the passenger seat.

He grinned. "Well, I thought about it, but I wanted to make sure you could recognize me. I must say, I find your need for intrigue quite amusing. Can I call you by your real name, or do we need code names?"

She blushed at the mention of code names, remembering a time long ago their romantic involvement had been a secret, when he'd called her his Principessa, and he'd been her Vittorio.

"We're just going back to your house. I don't think code names are necessary," she said quickly, eager to push aside past fond memories.

"Okay, but if you change your mind, I get to pick code names this time around," he said.

She raised an eyebrow as she steered the car away from the hospital. "What's wrong with the names I picked?"

"Well, nothing I guess, but if we were going to pick new code names, I think I'd need to be named after something better than a lowly gondolier," he said.

"I guess it's good then that we don't need code names," she said defensively. "I shudder to think what you'd choose to call me."

He laughed in response. "Come on, let's go home. I have big dinner plans."

She offered him a tentative smile as she drove away from the hospital. Neither of them noticed the car following them at a distance.


	37. Chapter 37

Chapter 37

By late evening, the snow was coming down much harder, the big fluffy flakes swirling in the wind as if they were performing a wild dance. It reminded Erica of the way the snow had blinded her as they'd left Jonathan's cabin that night. She tried to push that thought from her mind and enjoy dinner and innocuous conversation with David instead.

After he cleaned up the kitchen, David found Erica standing by the glass door that led out to the back deck. She was staring out the window, apparently watching the snow with her back to him. Several inches had already fallen onto the already slush-covered roads since she'd picked him up at the hospital, and it didn't show any sign of letting up.

"It looks like we may get quite a bit more snow than predicted," he said casually. She didn't respond.

He watched her for a few moments before gently placing a hand on her back. She startled in response, and he immediately pulled his hand away and took a step back, not wanting to upset her.

"Erica?" he asked carefully, "Are you thinking about that night?"

She nodded as she continued to watch the snow falling. Somehow it didn't surprise her that he knew what she'd been thinking. Then she turned and looked up at him with an unreadable expression on her face. "You carried me through the snow. You were hurt, bleeding, but you carried me."

His expression darkened at the memory. "Yes, I did. You scared the hell out of me."

Her eyes widened in surprise. "I did?"

"Your eyes had this glassy look to them, and your breathing was shallow. You'd been drugged with some unknown substance. I had no idea if that bastard was trying to kill you or just knock you unconscious. I just knew I needed to get you to a hospital as quickly as possible. Leaving you in the snow to fend for yourself wasn't really an option."

"Why not?" she whispered.

He stared at her in shock, not sure how to respond. "What do you mean? Why didn't I leave you there to die in the snow?"

She nodded.

He turned away from her, blowing out an expletive under his breath as he ran his fingers through his hair.

"How can you even ask that, Erica?"

"I had you arrested before. I tried to put you in jail. I tried to put your daughter in jail. And yet you drove all the way up to New Hampshire to look for me. You stopped Jonathan from… from raping me. You took care of me. You were shot because of me. You did your best to get me to safety, even though you were seriously injured yourself. Why would you do all of that? I need to know, David," she said in a quiet but insistent voice.

He knew Erica would ask him why. He'd tried to avoid the subject when they were in the hospital in New Hampshire, but it was inevitable that she'd want to know why he searched for her. He wasn't sure how to explain it to himself, much less to her though. The truth was that there was no rational thought involved, not after he stormed out of the Pine Valley Police Department. He'd thought only of how to find her and get her away from Jonathan Kinder.

As he'd lain in a hospital bed in New Hampshire, he'd contemplated the entire outrageous situation more thoroughly as it began to sink in that he'd nearly gotten killed saving a woman who hated his guts. When that FBI agent, that plain-looking woman with an equally plain and forgettable name confirmed for him that no, Erica had not been raped by Jonathan Kinder, he'd felt enormous relief. He'd seen for himself just how difficult it was for Erica to cope with memories of her rape at age 14. He'd seen how she struggled to cope with her daughter Bianca suffering that same fate and bearing a child from rape, just as her mother had done years before.

When David found out that he did get there in time – just in the nick of time in fact – to prevent Erica from being brutally raped again, he told himself that that's why he did it. He went to New Hampshire and ultimately took a bullet for her because he was fairly convinced that if she had to go through that all again, there was no way she'd pull through it with her sanity intact.

He took a deep breath as he looked at her.

"Yeah, you tried to put me in jail, but before that you leaned on me for support. We were friends. We were… we were close. We loved each other once. You were furious over what I did for Krystal and for Babe, and you took that out on me. I'd expect no less from Erica Kane. But that doesn't mean I'd be willing to let a monster like Kinder hurt you," he said sincerely, "Not after what you've already been through."

"David, I'm… I'm more grateful to you than you can possibly know. What you did, the way you rescued me in New Hampshire… you went above and beyond the call of friendship. And now, letting me stay here like this to try to work through some of my emotions… I just didn't expect this from you, and I don't know what to think about it," she admitted as she watched for his reaction.

He sat down on the sofa and watched the flames dancing in the fireplace as he debated a response. "Erica, it seems like no matter what happens to us, there's always something there that never disappears. There's a bond we have that just doesn't go away."

Her suspicious expression softened at his words. He watched as her breathing seemed to increase, and he had no doubt that if he could put his hand on her chest, he'd be able to feel her heart beating rapidly under his palm.

Erica felt her heart skip a beat. He'd said something very similar to her once before, shortly after Bianca's father died. She'd pulled back from him then, she'd run from him the way she always did whenever emotion overwhelmed her, whenever the man in her life got too close for comfort. Was this him trying to subtly admit that he still had feelings for her? Did he still love her? Was that why he'd risked his life to save her? God, this conversation was exactly what she'd feared when she'd agreed to stay here. They had too much unfinished business between them. Too many unsaid words. Too much emotion, too much, well, _everything_ there just beneath the surface.

She was married to Jack. It was what she'd wanted for so many years. They had a home and a life together. They'd built an extended family together. She had been happy before Jonathan Kinder tried to wreck it all! She shouldn't be here with David. He was dangerous - they were dangerous together. She knew he'd never agree to let her leave in this weather, but she could hide in the guest room. Read a book. Work on her laptop. Wait out the snowstorm and then go to Opal's.

That was what the rational, logical part of her brain told her. But the rest of her body didn't seem to get the message. Before she knew it, Erica was sitting down on the sofa beside David, her eyes locked with his.


	38. Chapter 38

Chapter 38

For a moment, neither of them moved. They were seated next to each other, bodies turned in slightly toward each other, just inches apart. To Erica, the air around her felt suddenly electric, and every instinct in her screamed at her to get up, to move away, before she made a huge mistake.

David held his breath as he watched her, so very close to him. He realized with a start that he wanted to grab her, to reach out with his good arm and pull her against him and kiss her with everything he had in him, but he was afraid to move, afraid to push her away, afraid to add to the emotional turmoil she was already in.

He finally couldn't resist. He reached out with his right hand and gently trailed a fingertip along her cheek. The bruises were now gone, and her face was as lovely as ever. She blew out a shaky breath in response and closed her eyes.

She waited, afraid to move, afraid to even breathe. He would kiss her. She knew he would. Any second now she would feel his lips against hers, full and warm and sensuous. She was horrified to realize that a part of her wanted him to kiss her.

David saw her part her lips ever so slightly as her eyes fluttered shut. He wanted desperately to lean in and kiss her, to cradle her face in his hands, inhale the scent of her perfume, and pull her body against his. But he wouldn't. He wouldn't do that to her, not when she was still suffering so much because of Jonathan Kinder, not when she was more or less happily married. He had already hurt her beyond belief by keeping Bianca and Miranda apart, and he had no desire to wreck her marriage or do anything that might cause her more pain.

After several seconds, he drew together the willpower to remove his hand from her face. Her eyes fluttered open and she looked at him in surprise. His eyes met hers for another moment, and then he looked away.

She drew in a breath to steady herself before speaking. "So you're saying that you did what you did because you care about me," she said.

He ran his fingers through his hair again. "Yeah, something like that, I guess."

He needed to do something, say something to break the tension in the room, to put an end to the electricity he could feel radiating between them.

"I guess… maybe I felt like it was the least I could do after I let Krystal and Babe keep Miranda," he said, knowing he was bringing up the one subject that was guaranteed to infuriate Erica.

Just as he expected, her body tensed, her eyes flashed in anger, and she stood quickly, moving away from him.

"What you did to Bianca," she said angrily before he cut her off.

"What I did to Bianca was unforgivable, and I know that. I don't expect your forgiveness," he said seriously. "I don't want to dwell on that because I'm well aware of how you feel about my actions, but you asked why I came for you in New Hampshire. I did it in part because to make up for what I did to Bianca and because yes, Erica, I do still care about what happens to you."

"I see," she said icily as she stood in front of the fireplace, far from him.

"And because I care about you," he continued, "I couldn't just leave you at the mercy of a sick bastard like Jonathan Kinder."

"So where does this leave us?" she asked.

David leaned back against the sofa and pondered her question for a moment before deciding to go with a light answer. He wasn't sure he could handle any further deep conversation about the past, both recent and distant.

"Well, I guess it leaves us as two people who care about each other, and it leaves you in charge of the remote control because I made you watch basketball last night," he said with a smile as he slide the remote across the coffee table toward her.

She eyed the remote in surprise. That wasn't what she'd expected him to say, but perhaps it was for the best. Talking to him about Jonathan Kinder was one thing. Talking to him about Bianca or about them, about their relationship and any lingering feelings they might have, well, that was quite another.

She picked up the remote and sat down on the far opposite end of the sofa. "Okay then. I want something classic and old in black and white," she said, offering him a tentative smile.

A few minutes later, she nearly squealed with delight when she flipped through the channels and stumbled upon the opening credits for "Casablanca."

"Oh, David, this is one of my favorite movies! We have to watch this," she said almost pleadingly.

He laughed at her enthusiasm. "Okay, whatever you want."

Two hours later, she was wiping away tears and sighing over the film.

"God, I haven't seen that movie in years," David said. "If you want new code names, THAT is a good movie to pick from."

"Oh really?" Erica asked with a laugh.

"Sure. I can be Rick, and you can be Ilsa," he said. "I always did identify with Humphrey Bogart's character in that film."

"Mmmm… I can see that," Erica said.

"Really? I remind you of Humphrey Bogart?" he asked, grinning at her.

"I didn't say that. I said I could see you identifying with Rick Blaine," she clarified.

"Yeah… suave, devilishly handsome nightclub owner and businessman who is adored by the ladies and doesn't give a damn about morals or the rest of the world. That's pretty much me," David quipped.

"Yes, right up until the end of the film when Rick does the right thing and sacrifices his own happiness with Ilsa so she can escape with her husband, and then he and Louis join the resistance movement," Erica laughed.

"What? You don't think I could be the good guy?" he asked.

Her face softened. "You've already been the good guy. You saved me, remember?"

"How could I forget?" he said quietly. "So I guess Rick and Ilsa it is."

She smiled. This felt familiar. It felt nice. It scared her.


	39. Chapter 39

Chapter 39

"So… are you going to wake me up again at an un-Godly hour in the morning?" David asked, abruptly changing the subject. He didn't want to dwell the film or the similarities between it and their lives.

"Of course not. Tomorrow is Saturday. I was hoping to sleep in and then maybe go into the office for a few hours," she said over her shoulder as she walked out of the room.

David flipped the television over to the local news, frowning as he listened to the latest weather reports. The weatherman was encouraging everyone to stay off of the roads if possible, and significant snow accumulation was expected overnight.

Erica emerged from the guest room sometime later, barefaced and dressed in a long ivory silk robe.

"Are you turning in for the night?" he asked.

"I was thinking about it," she said. She looked at him hesitantly.

"What?" he asked.

She bit her bottom lip for a second. She really had no right to ask this of him. He'd been so incredibly thoughtful, and she was already imposing on him just by staying here with him. Plus it was risky, far too risky, but somehow she couldn't stop herself.

"David, I… it was so much easier for me to go back to sleep last night when you were in the room, when I wasn't all alone," she started to say.

"You nearly took my head off because you didn't like me looking your direction while sitting in a chair," he pointed out.

She looked embarrassed. "And then I went right to sleep," she reminded him.

"After arguing about it and threatening to leave in the middle of the night."

"Do you always have to be so difficult?" she asked in exasperation.

"Do you?" he shot back.

She pursed her lips and put her hands on her hips.

"Do you want me to stay with you while you go to sleep?" he offered, noting with pleasure the immediate look of relief on her face.

"Would you mind? I, um… I don't like being alone. I mean, I know that's asking a lot of you, and I don't want to impose…"

"You're not imposing, Erica. I offered to let you stay here so you could try to work through some of your emotions and start to feel like yourself again. Part of getting back to normal involves getting plenty of rest, and if this helps you, I don't mind," he said, hoping that she'd hear the honesty in his voice.

"Thank you, really," she blew out in relief.

"I do have one requirement though," he said, eying her cautiously.

"Anything," she said without thinking.

"I want you to sleep in my bed," he said.

She looked stunned, but then she quickly took a step back, holding her hands up defensively.

"NO!" she said sharply.

"You're not going to let me even explain?" he asked, raising an eyebrow at how quickly she reacted.

"I don't need an explanation," she hissed. "This is all SO convenient isn't it? You get me here, ask me to stay with you, pretend to be SO concerned for my emotional well-being, and then try to lure me into your bed? You really are disgusting!"

"You think I'm disgusting?"

"YES, I do, and if you think I'm going to sleep with you," she continued before he cut her off.

"YOU DID," he shot back.

"Excuse me?"

"Sleep with me. You did. Last night," he said.

"I did no such thing!"

"Yes, you did. I fell asleep next to you, and we slept in the same bed, and absolutely nothing remotely inappropriate happened. Get over yourself, Erica," he said in irritation.

She was silent for a moment and she looked taken aback.

"Are you going to let me explain? Or are you going to keep yelling?" he asked.

She folded her arms and glared at him.

"I don't mind staying with you while you fall asleep, but I'd rather not be in a small bed in a room overflowing with luggage. I've already got an injured shoulder, and if I have to get up to go sleep on the sofa after you fall asleep, I'd prefer to be able to walk out of the room without tripping over your things and breaking my neck. I have a far more comfortable and far larger bed in my room. I can lay there on the bed and not look at you, and you can be further than arm's reach from me. You go to sleep and I don't break my neck and everyone is happy," he said.

"You're going to sleep elsewhere?" she asked.

"If that makes you more comfortable, yes," he said. "I'll sleep on the sofa."

She eyed him warily, and he threw up his good arm in exasperation.

"You're married, and you made it perfectly clear that you hate me, and I'd have to be insane to ever want to be involved with you again. To be entirely honest, Erica, I really don't know why you're even here," he said.

"YOU INVITED ME," she shot back.

"Yeah, and I didn't think you'd actually show up," he admitted. "I thought you'd feel safer being away from the very place you were attacked, but I didn't think you'd actually be willing to come here!"

He shook his head and looked away for a moment. "I was trying to be nice. I felt BAD for you, okay? This was not some grand seduction scheme. Jesus Erica, give me a little credit."

She ran her fingers through her hair and did her best to avoid looking at him. This was mortifying. She was beyond embarrassed that she'd accused him of seduction when he clearly didn't want her. If he'd wanted her, he would have kissed her before, when they'd been seated on the sofa together.

Still, the idea of sleeping in his bed, even without him in it, just seemed so, well, _wrong._ She drew in a deep breath. She wasn't about to embarrass herself further by pushing him to admit just how undesirable she was to him or by pushing him until he refused to keep her company at all. There was nothing remotely untoward about his request. He didn't mind helping her, but he wanted to be comfortable as well, and that was certainly understandable and fair. It was his home, after all.

She nodded as serenely as possible. "Fine then," she said stiffly as she walked past him to his bedroom.


	40. Chapter 40

Chapter 40

David debated the wisdom of his suggestion that she sleep in his bed a little bit later when they were actually in his bedroom and Erica was sitting on the bed, carefully removing the ace bandage from her sprained ankle.

Being in this room with her, knowing that he was about to lie down with her in his bed, even if it was just until she fell asleep, it felt so intimate. He retreated to the master bathroom to get ready for bed and to splash his face with cold water. He nearly had a heart attack a few minutes later when he opened the bathroom door just in time to see her sliding the robe off of her shoulders. Her back was to him, and he stood frozen in place as he watched as the silky fabric slid down, exposing inch after inch of flawless creamy skin. Her back was almost completely bare, save for absurdly thin straps of fabric that apparently held up the negligee she was wearing. The negligee, also ivory satin or silk of some kind, skimmed over her body and ended mid-calf, and had a slit in the back that allowed him to glimpse the back of her knees. Dear God, she looked amazing, and he was only seeing the back of her.

He watched as she carefully draped the robe at the foot of the bed where it would be within easy reach. She pulled back the covers, fluffed her pillows and then turned toward him as she sat down on the bed. The front of the negligee had lace at the top, lace that exposed the tops of her breasts.

David sucked in a breath and willed himself to think of something – anything – that would distract him from the way she looked, but it was no use. He finally forced himself to move toward her as he found his voice.

"What the hell are you wearing?" he ground out.

She looked up at him in surprise. "A nightgown."

"That is NOT a nightgown, Erica," he said in frustration.

She looked down at her clothes, surprised by his suddenly forceful tone. "What's wrong with what I'm wearing?" she asked in confusion. "I almost always sleep in something like this, you know that."

He ran his fingers through his hair as he turned away from her and strode briskly to his dresser. "You cannot wear that."

"Why not?" she demanded.

He turned around, clutching one of his t-shirts in his hands. "Because, Erica, I'm not a robot. I'm a man, and I'm trying to be a responsible man, despite sharing a bed with a married woman. You cannot sleep in here dressed like that."

She looked down at the negligee and blushed as his meaning became clear: he found her attractive, desirable even.

He tossed the t-shirt at her. "Please," he said, gesturing toward the bathroom, "Go change, or go back to your room and find something else to wear."

She took the t-shirt from him and went to the bathroom, puzzled by his response. If he did find her attractive, so desirable in fact that he didn't want her to wear her own regular lingerie, then why hadn't he kissed her? David wasn't the honorable, noble type, but he'd made it clear that he didn't want her, so who cared what she wore? Erica shook her head in confusion. Thus far, very little about this stay with David made any sense to her.

David watched her close the bathroom door and he blew out an expletive under his breath. He might as well just admit it to himself that he still found her incredibly attractive. He sure as hell couldn't ever admit it to her, and he'd never be able to act on it, but he wanted her. He'd told himself time and again it was over, that any chance of reconciliation with Erica died the day he looked at a DNA test and put it aside, the day he knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that Bess Chandler was Miranda Montgomery but chose to look the other way.

He ran his fingers through his hair and paced around the room as he waited for her to change. Erica seemed like she was doing better. She'd lost some of that haunted look she'd had in her eyes when she first visited him after their return from New Hampshire, and once she'd gotten past the nightmare last night, she said she'd slept okay. That was really the point of this whole visit, wasn't it? It was all for her, to make her feel better, to help her cope. He wasn't the therapist she really needed, but he was trying to do what she wanted and what he thought was best.

It made him sick to remember how she'd looked in Jonathan Kinder's cabin that night or how terrified she looked when she awoke the night before screaming from a nightmare. If he could help her in some way, help her begin to feel like herself again, than it was worth any discomfort he had over where she slept or what she wore. He owed it to her. After what he'd done to Bianca and Miranda, he more than owed her, he told himself, and he would do whatever it took to help her.

The absolute last thing he would do, he vowed silently, was act on any feelings he still had for her. It was the last thing she needed or deserved.

He looked for something to read, something to take his mind off of the beautiful woman in the bathroom. He settled on a thick and frankly dull biography of Winston Churchill before he removed the sling from his injured shoulder and lay down on top of the bedding, covering himself with a spare blanket.

Erica emerged from the bathroom a few minutes later dressed in his t-shirt. It was enormous on her, and thus shapeless, but her legs were still bare from mid-thigh down. God, she even managed to make an old t-shirt look sexy. David quickly averted his eyes, glancing down at his book.

Erica looked down self-consciously at the t-shirt. She felt absolutely ridiculous in it and completely confused by the mixed signals she was getting from David. He'd already turned off all of the lights, save for a small lamp on his side of the bed that he used to read.

He didn't acknowledge her as she got into the bed, but that was probably for the best, she thought. His presence was reassuring, and it beat being alone, but she wasn't comfortable with the idea of him actually being _in_ bed with her.

"Thank you, for this," she said quietly as she looked up at him.

He put down his book for a moment and smiled at her. "You're welcome. Now go to sleep."

She shifted in the bed, burrowing into the warm blankets as she yawned. "Good night Rick," she said softly.

A smile played on David's lips. "Good night, Ilsa," he said as he picked up his book again.

The next time he looked over at her, she was sound asleep. He watched her for a moment and then heaved a reluctant sigh as he put aside his book, gathered up his blanket and headed to the sofa.


	41. Chapter 41

_Author's Note: My apologies for the delay in posting. I felt horrible that I wasn't able to keep up with daily updates to this story. When I started sharing "Gone," I had large portions already written, but as I got further into it, I realized that I wanted to re-work quite a few parts. I've been rewriting and adding chapters while also trying to write the next chapter of "The Truth Shall Set You Free." I've got another big soap-related project underway, and of course, I have a "real" job and young children, so please bear with me. I absolutely plan to see this story through to completion, and I hope you enjoy it!_

Chapter 41

She wasn't entirely sure where she was or how she got there. She was aware of only one thing: cold. Not that slight chill you get in the summer when the air conditioner is on too high in the office or that invigorated, red-cheeked cold you felt after spending too long ice skating on the pond. No, this was a miserable, bone-chilling cold that burned her skin and made her shiver uncontrollably. She couldn't understand why she was suddenly so cold, but she jerked her arms inward toward her body in a feeble attempt to keep warm.

Erica awoke with a start, still shivering as she realized that she'd kicked off the covers in her sleep. She quickly pulled the blankets around herself and curled up in the bed. The lamp was off in the bedroom, and she was alone in the bed. She pulled her knees up toward her chest in an attempt to keep warm. Why was it so cold? She couldn't possibly sleep like this.

"David?" she called out from the bed.

She waited a few moments, and when she didn't get a response she sat up in bed and called out to him again, more loudly this time, repeating herself until David stumbled into the dark room.

"What is it? What's wrong?" he asked in a sleepy voice as he reached for the light switch. He flicked the switch up and down a few times before cursing under his breath.

"Power's out," he announced.

"I'm cold," Erica said.

"Yeah, it's freezing in here. Hold on," he said.

She pulled the blankets more tightly around herself as he fumbled in the dark. A few minutes later, the beam light from a flashlight illuminated the room. She watched as he walked to the window and pulled back the shade enough to glance outside.

"It looks like we got hit pretty badly by that snowstorm. It's still coming down," he said. "I can build a fire in the living room, and it'll warm up pretty quickly in there."

He motioned with the flashlight toward the doorway as if he expected her to follow him.

"You want me to get out of bed? You can't be serious. I'll freeze to death," Erica said incredulously.

"You will not. Do you have some warmer clothes you can put on? If not, I can give you a sweater of mine," he offered.

Warmer clothes, yes that sounded like an excellent idea she thought as she slid out of bed, shrieking as her bare feet touched the cold wood floors.

"And socks," she gasped, "I need socks!"

After a quick detour to the guest room to get new clothes, Erica ended up in the living room, wearing a pair of her own yoga pants with David's socks and bulky sweater.

"I look ridiculous," she complained.

He shone the flashlight over her.

"No you don't, and it beats freezing. Hold the flashlight for me while I build a fire."

"How long is it going to take for the fire to warm up the bedroom?" she asked as she watched him.

"Too long. Until the electricity comes back on, our best bet is to close all the other doors and stay in here where the fire is."

She looked around the living room. "I'd rather go back to sleep," she complained. "David, I'm exhausted. Can't you hurry up?"

"Give me a minute to get the fire going, okay? Then you can sleep on the sofa," he said in frustration as he fumbled with the matches.

Erica sighed dramatically and made a big show of pulling the sleeves of his sweater down over her hands to keep warm. The flashlight wobbled as she did so, and he cursed as he dropped an unlit match.

"Would you hold still?" he snapped. He'd forgotten what it was like to be around Erica all the time. He'd forgotten how impatient and demanding she could be. Maybe having her here really was for the best if it made him remember just how often she drove him absolutely crazy when they were together.

"I can't hold still. I'm trying to avoid freezing to death," she snapped back.

When he had the fire burning brightly enough to provide some illumination in the room, he took the flashlight back.

"Stay here in front of the fire and warm up, and I'm going to get more blankets," he said, grateful that she'd stopped complaining.

She remained quiet as she watched him move the coffee table out of the way and position a cushioned ottoman beside the sofa. He tossed several pillows and blankets on the leather sofa where he'd been sleeping before and then turned back to her.

"You can spread out on the sofa, and I can prop my feet up on the ottoman, and we can sleep in here. It's more comfortable than sleeping on the floor," he offered.

He half-expected her to complain, but to his surprise, she smiled gratefully as she sat down on the sofa. It was more than a little awkward, but they eventually settled in: Erica lying down with a pillow propped up against David, and David in a semi-reclining position with his feet propped up on the ottoman.

Erica drifted off to sleep quickly, but David spent a very long time watching the flickering light cast by the flames, quietly contemplating the woman asleep beside him.

When she awoke much later, light poured in through the living room windows, filling the space with the glow of early morning. Erica looked around the room, trying to get her bearings. The fire had died down to glowing embers, but she was warm and cozy beneath the blankets David had piled on the sofa.

She remembered then that David was asleep beside her. She lifted her head carefully from her pillow and looked up at him. He was sound asleep with one arm draped haphazardly over her. His neck seemed to be bent at an odd and uncomfortable angle, but she hated to wake him when he seemed so peaceful. Instead she rested her head back on her pillow and focused her gaze on the glass door and the large amount of snow beyond it.

The snow had finally stopped falling, and it looked as if the storm had dumped at least two feet of snow outside David's backdoor. If the rest of Pine Valley had been hit as hard, she had a feeling the electricity could be off for a while. She wondered what condition the roads were in until she remembered that they weren't actually in Pine Valley proper, and that it would take time for snowplows to make their way down Old Orchard Road to David's cabin. Plus she'd have to make a path to her car just to dig it out of the snow.

She sighed. It was beginning to look like she was going spend her Saturday morning stuck here with David instead of at the studio. That certainly wasn't going to help the backlog of work she had piling up. Still, if she had to be snowed in, she'd rather be snowed in with David than at home alone. At least here she had someone to keep her company. At least here she felt safe.

That she felt safe with David Hayward troubled her to no end. How had that happened? It was so unexpected and unlikely that David appeared out of nowhere that night in New Hampshire. She still had trouble wrapping her mind around the idea that the same David who let Bianca believe that her sweet baby girl was dead possessed enough compassion to risk his own life to rescue her from Jonathan Kinder's hell on earth. How could he be so unspeakably cruel to Bianca and Miranda – to her whole family really - and then turn around and be so kind?

Jonathan Kinder had turned her entire world upside down, and Erica wasn't sure how to right it. She should be at home right now, curled up in bed beside her husband, listening to him protest as she wriggled her cold toes against him. It should have been Jack who got up during the night and built a fire for her, Jack who made sure she was warm and comfortable on the sofa so she could sleep. That she was here with David instead, listening to the rhythmic sound of his breathing as he slept beside her, felt so incredibly wrong.


	42. Chapter 42

_Author's note: For those who've been asking when Jack is coming back to this story, he makes an appearance in this chapter, and you'll soon see more of him._

Chapter 42

By mid-morning Erica was still contemplating this turn of events in her life and the chaos Jonathan Kinder had wrought. The electricity was still off as well, but David had a gas stove and was able to boil water for her for tea, and the living room was comfortable with the fire blazing. He hadn't made any comment about their sleeping arrangement, which Erica found odd. If anything, David seemed to be in a remarkably good mood considering that they were snowed in and without electricity.

She was about to ask him why he was in such good spirits when her phone rang. She jumped up from the sofa and ran for the guest bedroom in search of her phone.

Her heart pounded at the sight of the familiar number.

"Who is it?" David asked from the doorway.

"Jack. Go away," she said sharply, waving her hand dismissively at him.

He raised an eyebrow at the tone of her voice but shook his head at her and walked away.

She drew in a deep breath and answered her phone.

"Jack! How are you? How is the conference? How's Lily?" she asked in a voice that sounded a little too happy to her own ears.

"It's fine. The conference is fine, and Lily and I are having a nice time and learning a lot," Jack said in a surprised voice. "You seem… happy. I was going to ask if you were okay, but it sounds like you're doing okay? How are you?"

She bit her lip for a moment. Okay? She didn't have the slightest idea if she was really okay or not.

"I guess so," she said.

"Well, I was calling…we saw on TV that the whole area got hit with a lot of snow, and I wanted to check on you," he said. "How is the weather? Are you okay? Have you talked to Reggie?"

"Ah, not since last night," Erica said as she nervously twisted the bottom of David's sweater around her fingers. "He was at his friend Marcus' house, and I made him promise to stay home. It was already snowing and the roads were slick when I left the studio."

"Good, well, I'll give him a call later this morning and check on him. I didn't want to call and wake him up on a Saturday morning. You know how teenaged boys are," Jack said with a laugh. "So how much snow did you get?"

"Well, I haven't measured, but maybe two feet?" Erica said with a shrug as she glanced out the window.

"Wow," he said in surprise.

"Mmm hmmm."

"Well, then I know when I call Reggie, I'm going to have to listen to a lengthy rant about the unfairness of Mother Nature dumping all that snow on Pine Valley on a Saturday and not a school day," Jack laughed.

"Probably," she acknowledged.

"So you're pretty much snowed in," he said.

"Yes, and Jack, I'm really not happy about it. I'd hoped to go into the studio and get caught up a bit, and I don't know that I can manage that until they clear the roads," she said in annoyance.

"Why would you go into the studio today? Honey, it's a girls' weekend. Take advantage of the time you've got with Opal," Jack said gently. "Besides, you're supposed to be resting. Are you… honey, how are you sleeping?"

She could hear the worry in his voice, and she felt a twinge of guilt over the lie she'd told. She couldn't very well tell him that she wanted to go to the office to avoid being alone with David Hayward or that she was sleeping just fine as long as David stayed with her while she fell asleep.

"I'm fine Jack. I'm getting plenty of rest," she said firmly, wanting to reassure him.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure. Listen, Opal just pulled out the tarot cards, so I've got to go. Give Lily my love, and I'll see you both tomorrow evening," she said quickly.

"Um, okay," he said in surprise. "You know I'm just calling to check up on you because I love you."

She smiled into the phone. "I know. I love you too," she said, and she meant it.

"I didn't hear any yelling. I take it you didn't tell Jackson where you really are," David said dryly when Erica walked back into the living room, her arms wrapped around herself.

"Why would I tell him that I'm here?" she asked with a shrug.

"Because he's your husband, and you're lying to him," David said, amazed by the apparent ease with which she neglected to tell her husband the whole truth.

"Jack would never approve of my being here," she pointed out.

"Does it matter if he approves or not?" he asked in genuine curiosity.

"Jack doesn't control me. He's my husband, not my master," she said in irritation.

David laughed. "If there's anything I learned from being in a relationship with you, it's that no man controls Erica Kane."

She tilted her head at him and looked at him for a moment.

"You think being out of the same house where I was attacked might help me, and you offered a safe place where I didn't have to pretend that everything was fine. I'm trying to cope with what happened, trying to handle it in my own way. I don't see why that's a problem," she said.

"So then tell Jack where you are," he said, silently noting that she didn't dispute his statement about no man controlling her.

"Don't be absurd."

"If it's no big deal that you're here, then why keep it a secret," he asked.

"Jack hates you."

"Yeah, that's not exactly a newsflash," he retorted. "That I saved your life doesn't matter?"

"In light of everything else you've done?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.

"I don't know if you've noticed this, but people in this town are hypocrites," David said as he walked toward her. "They lie, cheat, steal, and do various and sundry bad things, but they get away with it. Someone like Jake Martin can botch something at the hospital, and it's okay because he's a Martin. Adam Chandler can mistreat another one of his wives or screw someone over in business, and everyone shrugs as if to say, 'Well, it's Adam, what do you expect?'

"Your sainted husband, the former D.A. can steal heroin from a police evidence room, and everyone says 'Oh, well, he had a good reason.' But me? No matter what I do, my motives are suspect," he said, "Even when I'm telling the truth."

She seemed surprised by this turn in the conversation.

"Would Jack care if you were staying with one of the saintly Martins? Or with your ex-husband, Adam Chandler?" David asked.

Erica looked at him in confusion. "I don't know that he'd care so much as that he'd think it's really strange. I have no reason to want to stay with Tad or Joe and Ruth or with Adam."

"But would you have to lie to him?" he pressed.

"David, where are you going with this?" she asked in confusion.

"You're lying to your husband about where you are and what you're doing because he would object to you being here with me, but he wouldn't care if you stayed with your ex-husband or even your ex-father-in-law because they're 'good' and I'm the bad guy. Don't you see how ridiculous that is?"

Erica shook her head and sighed. "People in this town are more than content to let go of the past. No one appreciates being judged for their actions, David, and that's what you do."

"Your husband once illegally disposed of a body. He stole drugs from an evidence room to plant them on someone while he was District Attorney. You don't see a problem with him throwing stones when he lives in a glass house? The things Jack had done…"

"JUST STOP!" Erica said, holding up her hands.

David paused for a moment to look at her.

"Let's not do this. Please," she said. "I don't want to argue about Jack. I didn't come here to argue about Jack – or to justify my marriage to you. I slept really well last night, aside from thinking I might freeze to death. I didn't have any nightmares. I honestly don't remember the last time I slept that many hours in the course of one night. Please don't spoil it. If I have to be stuck here with you because of the snow, then let's not argue."

He sighed. He couldn't believe he'd been about to spit the truth at her: that her husband had been so convinced of his own moral superiority, so unwilling to believe that David Hayward could possibly tell the truth, that he'd let Erica suffer at Jonathan Kinder's hands while the investigation was stymied. What the hell was wrong with him? It was obvious she didn't know what Jack and Derek had done or the effect it had on the investigation. Telling her would only hurt her, and that was the last thing he wanted or she needed. He did wonder how stable that marriage was, but if she wasn't in the mood to discuss it, he wouldn't push her.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly. "I didn't mean to upset you. I'm sure we can find something else to do."

She nodded and turned away from him. She was trapped here, snowed in with no electricity. Her only company was an ex-fiancé who seemed eager to discuss the past. Oh God, this had the potential to be disastrous, she thought.


	43. Chapter 43

Chapter 43

To Erica's surprise, the day continued with far less stress than she'd feared. David brought out a chess board, and they played several games, him winning most of them, although she accused him of distracting her by asking so damn many questions. He asked about Kendall and Zach, about Reggie, and about Lily. He asked about Greenlee, about how she was coping with Ryan's death, about her pregnancy, and how Erica and Jack felt about being grandparents, laughing when Erica gave him a death glare and informed him that she was NOT a grandmother to Greenlee's child.

He asked cautiously about Erica and Jack's relatively new house and was surprised to hear that Jack had bought it without even consulting her, presenting it to her as a Christmas present.

"So it was kind of like, 'Merry Christmas, here's a 30 year mortgage?'" he asked.

Erica nearly choked on her tea. "It was actually quite romantic at the time. He had a Christmas tree set up in the living room, and a picnic spread out in front of the fireplace." She blushed at the memory of that picnic and how they'd made love in front of the fireplace.

"The mortgage details came later," she finished, averting her eyes from David's gaze.

"The man bought a house without even consulting you," he said in amazement.

"Well, we'd all been crammed into his loft after the wedding, and no one had any privacy, and everyone was on top of each other, so we really did need a bigger place," she explained.

"Yeah, so you hire a Realtor, and you go together and look at houses," David said. "This house that he bought – was it what you would have chosen?"

"It's a perfectly lovely house, David," she said defensively.

"You didn't answer the question," he challenged.

"It was such a romantic gesture, and I was so thrilled with the idea of us having a bigger place, so I didn't really question it at the time. We'd talked about what we both wanted in a home, and really, this one did fit the bill. It met all the requirements I'd given him," she said.

"But?" he prodded.

Erica sighed. "After actually moving in…it's really not perfect, and if we'd gone together to look at houses, this one would have been on my list of favorites, but ultimately…I guess it would have depended upon what else was available," she said.

"Look, I absolutely understand why Jack chose it, and walking around the house, right after he brought me there, I thought it was really ideal, and I told him as much. He was focused on proximity to the kids' school, and Lily's therapist as well as things like a game room where Reggie and his friends could hang out and enough space for Lily to have peace and quiet. I wanted a big fireplace, a lot of natural light and plenty of windows. I wanted huge closets for me and a place where I could work from home."

"Okay, that all sounds reasonable. So what's wrong with the house, in your opinion?" he asked.

"Aside from it being the place where Jonathan Kinder attacked me?" Erica said bitterly. "Well, it's not as close to my studio as I would like. I'd rather be in the center of town than further out in a new construction neighborhood. I lived in a penthouse above Enchantment, and I guess I was spoiled by the convenience of having my office right there. The house itself isn't necessarily bad, but the neighborhood feels a little…I don't know…'Stepford' for my taste."

David laughed at the Stepford remark. "You're nitpicking. Just admit it: it doesn't feel like your house because you had no say in it. It's Jack's house that he chose, and he expects you to live there with his kids and be happy," he observed. "It could be the single most perfect house for you in the entire world, and you'd still be resentful because you didn't choose it yourself."

She stared at him in surprise. "You know me very well," she said quietly after a moment.

"Yeah, I do, because we're just alike. Isn't that what you said once?" he asked.

Before she could respond, he slid his Queen across the chess board.

"Checkmate."

She looked down at the board. "Okay, I quit. No more chess. I can't concentrate on the game and play 20 questions with you at the same time."

"That's fine," he said as he put the chess board and pieces away. He looked a bit anxious as he turned back around to face her. "I'd rather have your full attention anyway, because I have a question about Bianca."

"About Bianca?" she asked in surprise. She wasn't sure if she wanted to talk about Bianca with David. That topic of conversation was likely to end with them arguing about Miranda and what he'd done, and if was being entirely honest with herself, she really didn't want to argue with David. She'd had a good night's sleep and a fairly relaxing day thus far, and she hated to ruin it with a fight.

David jammed his hands nervously in his pockets and looked at her for a few moments before he spoke.

"Yeah, well, about you, but also about Bianca," he said. He'd been dying to ask her this question for months, but since the kidnapping, it had gnawed at him constantly. Now, with her here in his home, with no one to interrupt them, he had to ask her.

"If I'd taken those test results and gone immediately to Bianca and to you – as I should have – if I'd been able to give Bianca her miracle and give her back the child she thought she'd lost, where would we be today?" he asked quietly, his eyes never leaving hers.


	44. Chapter 44

Chapter 44

Where would they be today? God, she didn't want to go there. She didn't want to think about what could have been. He'd been her ally, her friend, her alibi, her confidante. During their ruse, when they'd pretended to be lovers to give each other an alibi for the night Michael Cambias was murdered, she'd depended on him and trusted him. They'd been a team for the first time in more than two years, and it felt right. Oh God, did it feel right, so right that it scared her.

She'd had no idea on that day in late July, 2003, just how difficult her life was about to get, that she was about to fall down a rabbit hole of violence and pain and lies and despair that would ultimately bring her to a breaking point she never, ever could have imagined she'd reach. She'd thought that Greenlee interrupting her wedding to Jack was bad. She'd thought that Jack storming off and leaving her at the altar was bad. None of that prepared her for how she felt when David showed up on her doorstep that night.

David, who'd barely spoken two sentences to her since she helped him avoid jail time and they'd gone their separate ways two years earlier, was suddenly there in her penthouse, looking at her with such concern as he struggled to get out the words she never wanted to hear - he thought Bianca had been raped by Michael Cambias. She'd thought at the time that nothing could be worse than that: abandoned on her wedding day, sitting at home alone in her wedding gown with her ex-fiancé telling her that he thought her daughter had been violently attacked.

She'd had no idea just how bad it would get before it was all finally over.

Erica had never been a deeply religious person, but over the course of her life she had prayed for many things. One prayer she'd repeated over and over again, beginning with the day she and Mona flew out of Phoenix, leaving behind a baby girl she couldn't bear to even cast eyes upon, was the prayer that no child of hers would ever, EVER know what it was like to be raped. Knowing that her prayers had been denied, that her daughter had been brutalized in much the same way she'd been was almost too much to bear.

She hadn't expected David to become a constant in her life again, but when the truth tumbled out and Bianca finally admitted to Erica that she'd been raped, it was David Erica turned to for help. He was a doctor, of course, and he'd reconciled with his ex-wife, the Chief of Police, so it made sense to rely on David. That was what she told herself. Even early on though, she knew that she relied on David because Jack wasn't there. Jack didn't want to even speak to her when she tried to tell him about the rape.

It was Anna who finally brought Jack into the loop, and once he knew how Bianca had been violated, Jack had come right back into her life, but she'd been afraid to trust him. He'd walked out on her. He'd walked out on her countless times before, and even though she knew he was first and foremost on Bianca's side, he was also the District Attorney. He was tasked with bringing to justice the person who murdered her daughter's rapist.

So it was David who willingly became her support, her partner, her trusted confidante, and Bianca's as well. They hadn't planned to pretend to be lovers, but in the heat of the moment with the police breathing down their necks and David literally in handcuffs, under arrest for murder, she'd come up with the only alibi she could think of, the only one that couldn't be easily disproved.

They'd played up the role of lovers brought together by tragedy, publicly displaying their affection for months. Erica wasn't willing to admit it to anyone, but initially she did derive a small modicum of pleasure at the perpetually pained expression on Jack's face every time David touched her or kissed her in front of him. Jack deserved it, she told herself. He left her at the altar and left her alone to cope with the revelation that her daughter had been brutally raped. She still loved him of course, but she wasn't above letting him suffer for walking out on her either.

In the midst of all of the chaos and stress of that late summer and fall, the one thing she didn't expect, the one thing that caught her off guard was the revelation that she still had feelings for David Hayward.

He kissed her there in the police station, signaling that he'd go along with her story, attempting to prove to Derek, Jack and the others that they were romantically involved. It was a kiss, just a kiss. His hands were cuffed behind his back, and he couldn't even caress her, hold her. But it didn't matter. That one kiss sent shock waves through her body, and in an instant the last few years melted away, and it was like they'd never been apart.

Memories of their relationship came rushing back for Erica the more time she spent with David, and to her surprise she looked forward to seeing him. She'd welcomed every public touch, every public kiss he'd bestowed on her, and she'd been more affectionate than necessary away from the public eye. She told herself it was for their protection – best to keep up the ruse in case anyone walked in or overheard them – but in truth it was easy to slip into a familiar, affectionate routine with him. As they'd both agreed before, a lack of passion was never a problem.

No real lines had been crossed between them during that time. He hadn't even really tried to get back into her bed, which surprised her. Yes, she still loved Jack, still wanted him, and still hoped that if they all survived this nightmare that some way, somehow, she and Jack would find a way back to each other.

But David…David was an unexpected complication.

God help her, she began to fall for him again and found herself wondering if perhaps there could be something more between them again. She'd trusted him then more than she'd ever trusted him before.

Plus he'd protected her daughter, helped Bianca through the rape and the pregnancy. The lengths he'd gone to in order to protect Bianca…his support was a big reason why she had a granddaughter at all. If he'd been willing to do the right thing, if he'd been willing to look at those DNA tests and tell Krystal 'to hell with you' and put Miranda back in Bianca's arms… Well, he'd have been Bianca's hero, and hers.

What that would have meant for their future, she still didn't know.

"David, I hate playing 'what if,'" she said in a warning voice, hoping he'd drop the subject.

"I know, and I'm sorry, but I want you to do it this one time," he said firmly.

She shook her head vehemently as she got up from the table and moved to stand by the warmth of the fire.

"What if Paul Cramer had never switched the babies? What if some other, ethical paramedic had showed up? What if Bianca and Babe hadn't been stranded in a car in the middle of that storm? What if Babe had just taken Bianca home instead? What if Bianca hadn't gotten pregnant? Michael Cambias hadn't raped Bianca in the first place?"

She ran her fingers through her hair in frustration, and David sucked in a sharp breath at the suddenly tortured sound of her voice.

"You want to play 'what if?' Okay fine! What if you hadn't nearly thrown your life away for Dixie Martin? What if you hadn't drugged a boat full of people? Drugged ME, accidentally or not? What if you hadn't lied to me about Dimitri being alive? What if I'd never been raped as a teenager? Hell, David, what if my father had never abandoned me as a child? I can't play this game! I won't! It doesn't change anything, and it just makes everyone miserable thinking about what might have been!" she insisted angrily.

"I know that, okay, I know it! I know it doesn't change anything that happened in the past," David said insistently, "But maybe it's enough… maybe knowing the path not taken… maybe it's enough to change direction in the present. Maybe it's enough to change what could happen in the future."


	45. Chapter 45

Chapter 45

David paused for a moment, as if he was gathering his thoughts. Erica was surprised to see a hint of remorse in his eyes when he spoke again.

"You told me that my love for my daughter Babe was the last shred of human decency I had in me and to hold on it. Do you have any idea how that felt? To know that you were right? I threw my life away, more than once. I would have gone to jail for 20 years to prove a point – and a damned stupid one at that – but for you showing up at that jail and pushing me to get my act together to save Laura English's life."

Erica nodded, remembering how she'd pleaded with him not to waste his life, his talent, his potential, all in some twisted effort to prove his 'love' for Dixie Martin. She'd been unwilling to let Bianca's best friend die while David sat in jail and sulked.

"And then, after Leora…"

He stopped then, and the expression on his face broke her heart.

"All I cared about was revenge. I wanted the rest of the world to hurt as much as I did. For a while, I didn't care if I lived or died. I thought maybe Anna and I could salvage something of our relationship, but any hope – real hope – we had of staying together died with Leora," he said quietly. "Helping Bianca, being there for her, helping you, it gave me a reason to get out of bed each day."

She nodded again and moved to sit on the edge of the sofa. She wanted him to continue, but at the same time, she wasn't entirely sure she wanted to hear what he had to say. That he could grieve as he did for Leora and then turn around and inflict that same torment on Bianca was an act of cruelty she still had trouble fathoming. That her daughter suffered at the hands of someone who professed to love Bianca hurt her all the more. That David had professed to help her while also concealing Bianca's pregnancy was also a wound that hadn't really healed for Erica, and she wasn't at all comfortable with this line of conversation.

"All that mattered to me was protecting her, and protecting you if I could," he said quietly.

"By lying to me! You LIED to me, David!" she said, hating that her voice broke with the words, hating that tears filled her eyes.

"You pushed me away, Erica. When the truth came out, you wouldn't let me even try to comfort you," he reminded her.

"I pushed everyone away because everyone had lied to me," she said quietly. A tear slid down her cheek then and she wiped it away, hating that she was crying again.

"I know," he said earnestly. "Believe me, I wanted you to know the truth. I begged Bianca to tell you on more than one occasion. As a doctor, I had to put her first, and I couldn't violate her confidentiality like that, not after she'd already been violated so much already."

"And yet you thought nothing of keeping her baby from her," she said bitterly.

David moved to sit down on the edge of the coffee table, directly across from Erica, his knees on either side of hers. He blew out a shaky breath of his own. "That's not true. I agonized over that. Erica, believe me, if I had known when that DNA test was done… if I had known then that Babe's son was alive, I never would have kept the truth about Miranda from Bianca. I never would have hidden the test results."

She stared at him for a moment. "How big of you David," she said in an acid-laced voice. "You'd have done the right thing if you'd known that your precious long-lost tramp of a daughter would get what she wanted in the end."

She narrowed her eyes him, ignoring the pained expression on his face. "But you didn't know that. As far as you knew, Babe's baby was dead. Bianca's was alive. So you let Babe keep Bianca's daughter. You had to know that the truth would eventually come out. You had to know that someday it would be painfully obvious to anyone who could see that that little girl was a Kane and not a Chandler. She looks just like me!"

"I know," he said quietly. "I knew then that it was wrong."

"Why? Why then would you hurt Bianca like that?" she asked, the pain evident in her voice.

He looked down at his hands. "I think… I had lost Leora, and when she died, I lost Anna too," he started. "I'd already lost Frankie and then Leo. Maggie was really all the family I had left. You and Bianca… I had loved you, and I loved her like a daughter, but you pushed me away. Then all of the sudden, I had a daughter of my own. A grown daughter who had just lost her own child, like I had. To take Bess away from her, to inflict that kind of pain on her when she already knew that her own baby was dead…I couldn't do that to her. I wanted to try to spare her some of that pain."

"Yes, by forcing MY daughter to suffer through it," Erica spit out.

"I know. It wasn't a rational decision. It was wrong. What I did was wrong. I thought it was the right thing to do at the time, and I'll never forgive myself for hurting Bianca like that, for hurting you," he said quietly.

"My family fell apart, David," she said angrily. "I couldn't come to terms with my daughter having her rapist's baby, and both Bianca and Kendall blamed ME for Miranda's death, because I said things that led her to run off with Babe in that storm. I ended up on a drunken binge in Las Vegas, trying to cope with my rape, my father's death, my daughter's rape and the death of my grandchild."

"And NONE of that was my fault, Erica!" he insisted. "All of that – your inability to accept Bianca's choices, the words you said to her the night Miranda was born, the anger Kendall and Bianca had at you, your father's death, your own unresolved emotions, the drinking – happened long before that DNA test was ever done. Even if I'd done the right thing and told Bianca the truth right away, you still would have ended up sharing your grief with the bottom of a bottle of booze. I had NOTHING to do with any of that."

She stared at him in shock at the harshness of his words before she stood up and moved away from him. She knew deep down that he was right, but that didn't lessen the pain of his betrayal.

"I will freely admit that I was wrong to hide the truth from Bianca, but it wouldn't have changed the events surrounding Miranda's birth. It just would have brought her home a little bit sooner" he ground out.

"Sooner, yes. It would have brought her home sooner. You made us all grieve for that baby months longer than we should have! Because of what you did, Bianca had to learn the truth in a letter from Babe, who was on the run with her husband's brother. Bianca had to fight JR to get her own child back. David, she ended up in the hospital with a traumatic brain injury! She nearly DIED! And all of THAT could have been prevented."

"Maybe," he said quietly. "Or maybe that all would have happened, just sooner. JR didn't want to give Bess up, and he tried to take her and run, even with a court-ordered DNA test. Who is to say he wouldn't have done the same thing if I'd given Bianca DNA results showing that Bess was Miranda? Hell, JR didn't want to believe that Babe was my daughter! He probably would have accused me of working with Bianca and Kendall to steal his baby!"

Erica turned away from him, staring out the window at the snow-covered trees. Even when presented with DNA test results that had been verified by a judge, JR had refused to accept the truth and had tried to kidnap Miranda. She knew David was right – JR likely never would have accepted the results of David's test either. And if he'd been unwilling to accept those results, who knows what he would have done.

"I regret listening to Krystal far more than you will ever know," he swore. "None of us had any idea at the time just how screwed up, how vindictive, how sick JR really could be. If we had, there's no way we'd have wanted her to stay with him, and Krystal and I both would have done everything we could to get Babe away from JR and get Miranda back where she belonged."

She could hear the honesty in his voice, and she knew how much David loathed JR, how much it pained him that Babe wouldn't give up on her husband, despite all of his misdeeds. Still, David had hurt her, had hurt Bianca, and she couldn't just let go of that.

"Erica, I found out the truth about Miranda and about Babe the same time you came back from Vegas. I was saving my daughter's life when your family was intervening to try save yours from the alcohol," he continued.

"Don't you think that maybe, knowing the truth, that Miranda was alive, would have helped ME?" Erica asked in a pained voice.

"Maybe. Or maybe it would have pushed you over the edge and made you run again. Were you even willing to grieve for that baby before you got help for the alcohol? Could you have accepted Miranda, the baby conceived in your daughter's rape, when you were still drinking?" he asked.

Erica shook her head, still refusing to look at him. She'd felt like such a failure then. She'd fallen so far, so, so far from the day of her failed wedding a year earlier. Everyone who claimed to love her and care about her had lied to her about Bianca's pregnancy, and when she'd turned to alcohol to cope – with the pregnancy, with the lies, with the betrayal, with all of the emotions and fears from her past that were brought back to the surface – she had no one to trust. No one she could count on because they'd all lied to her.

"I did get help," she said, her voice shaking. "And using my trauma and my addiction as a reason to continue lying is horrible. It's beyond the pale, David."

He came up behind her, putting his hand on her upper arm. He leaned in to her and sighed. "I never kept the truth because you were drinking. I wanted to do what was right. I wanted there to be a way to help everyone. I never, ever wanted to hurt you, Erica."

"You did hurt me," she said angrily, pulling away and turning to face him. "You hurt me more than anyone else did because I trusted you! Do you get that, David? I really, _really _trusted you back then. You know how hard that is for me. I trusted you with my _life. _With Bianca's life! And you lied to me. You betrayed me – and my child – in the worst possible way."

She could feel angry tears pricking at her eyes again, and she took another step back from him in the hopes of maintaining some control over her emotions.

He looked defeated. "I know, and you have no idea how incredibly sorry I am. If I could take it back, if I could do it all over again, believe me, it would have been different. Maybe that's why I need to know. Maybe that's why I asked about what could have been."

She didn't want to believe him when he said he was sorry. It was easier, less complicated, to hate him for protecting Krystal, for leaving Miranda with JR Chandler. It was easier to pretend that the only feelings she had for him were hatred and disgust. And yet here she was, staying in his home, sleeping in his bed even, because she felt safe here, with him.

She resented him for bringing up the past, for dredging up one of the worst periods of her life. Erica knew it was irrational, but suddenly she wanted to hurt him. She wanted to make him suffer more for the way he'd betrayed her and her family. He looked pretty miserable already, but she didn't care.

Erica raised her chin and folded her arms over her chest and drew in a shaky breath.

"You want to know what could have been? I pushed you and everyone else away because you'd all lied to me, but you – you let me go. You didn't come after me. You didn't try to help me. I obviously didn't matter all that much to you," she said icily.

"That's NOT true, and you know it," David cut in.

"I know that I was alone, and I was suffering, and my daughter was grieving," she shot back, "And you – YOU had the power to put an end to it. YOU had the power to give my daughter a miracle."

He closed his eyes for a moment. "You're right," he admitted. "And I did the wrong thing."

"If you'd done the _right_ thing, if you'd put Miranda back in Bianca's arms, if you'd done it despite Krystal's pleas and her announcement that you were Babe's father, I would have known without a doubt that I could trust you, David," she said. Despite the hurricane of emotions inside of her, her voice sounded strangely calm to her own ears. "I would have known that you would do anything for me and for Bianca, and that would have been it for me."

"It?" he asked hoarsely.

She nodded, ready to drive the stake into his heart.

"I would have been able to look at you and know that you would always be there for me no matter what. I would have known without a shadow of a doubt that no man had ever loved me – and Bianca – as much as you did. If you had done the right thing, our relationship wouldn't have been just a ruse. We could have been together, truly together, and we could have been _so _happy. But you ruined it. You threw it all away, and _I hate you for that._"

Before she turned on her heel to dramatically stomp off to the guest room and slam the door hard for emphasis, she paused for a second to glance up at David. The utterly shell-shocked expression on his face was her reward.


	46. Chapter 46

Chapter 46

David stared in shock, unable to move or even respond to Erica before she stormed out of the room. He wasn't sure he was really even breathing.

They could have been together? They could have been happy? That would have been it for her? She hated him for ruining what could have been between them?

The fire was beginning to die down, so David forced himself into action. He added more logs to the fire and stoked the flames and then sat down on an ottoman by the fireplace as he tried to make sense of what had just happened here in this room.

Erica had feelings for him, feelings that extended beyond anger or hatred. That's what she'd said, wasn't it? He'd pushed her to tell him what could have been, and she said they could have ended up together. What the rest of Pine Valley thought was an affair could have blossomed into far more than that the following summer.

Surely she didn't mean it, did she?

David ran his fingers through his hair and pushed out a hard breath. Maybe she did mean it. As long as he'd known her, Erica had rarely had a problem telling him what she really thought. It was honest declarations of love and trust where she struggled. But she'd told him how she felt during their ruse, before Kendall went on trial for murdering Michael Cambias.

_"I depend on you. Bianca and I depend on you, David."_

He recalled her saying that to him in her penthouse above Enchantment, after her alibi had gotten him out of handcuffs and an arrest for murder. She'd told him over and over again over the course of those months how she depended on him, how she trusted him to protect her and Bianca both. Hell, he'd even offered to fall on his sword and take the fall for Michael's murder if it came to that – Leora was gone, and he had nothing left to live for anyway. She'd refused to let him, saying it would never come to that, and even if it did, she wouldn't let him do something that drastic.

He'd pondered her words that night – and many other nights – back in 2003. At the time he assumed she'd refused to let him take the blame for murder because she was convinced it would never come to that. Erica had a tendency to assume that everything would work out for the best somehow, and with a few notable exceptions in her life it usually did. But now as he sat alone by the fire, he wondered if her refusal back then was for other reasons as well. Was it because she still cared about him? Had their ruse stirred past emotions for her as it had for him? Did it make her think fondly on the time they'd spent together?

Then again, perhaps she'd told him just now that they could have been together as a way to hurt him. After all, she still had plenty of anger toward him over the role he'd played in keeping Bianca and Miranda apart. He wouldn't put it past her to use her words as a weapon. She'd done that often enough to him in the past.

He recalled then her angry confrontation in his office way back in 2000, after she found out that Dimitri was still alive and still with Alex Devane, and he'd mocked her for wasting her time pining away for someone she could never have.

_"You spent all your time with me trying to prove that you were the bigger man, that you were the better lover. Well now that we're through, I can tell you the truth: you never even came close. Not even once. Do I make myself clear Dr. Strangelove? You're a loser, and you always will be."_

Yes, Erica knew how to hit below the belt, that was for sure, and her words tonight and had pierced him hard enough to take his breath away.

He recalled for a moment how, after her declaration that he was such a loser, he kissed her and instead of shoving him away, she'd kissed him back. Kissed him back and then tore at his clothes when he lifted her onto Alex's desk. They'd made love on top of the desk and then on the sofa before ending up in a half-dressed tangle of limbs. So much for her declaration that they were through.

David ran his fingers through his hair and cursed under his breath. He shouldn't have gone there. He shouldn't have asked her what could have been. And yet… and yet he couldn't NOT ask. Having her here in his home, sitting with her while she fell asleep, holding her and calming her when she awoke from her nightmares brought back so many memories for him.

It was hard to hold her after a nightmare about Jonathan Kinder and not recall a night long ago when a late night thunderstorm stirred her from sleep in his hotel room. She'd sat up in bed, tensing as each thunderclap rattled the windows. He remembered sitting up with her, surprised that she was apparently afraid of thunderstorms until she admitted quietly, "It was storming that night… on my 14th birthday… when he… when I was…"

David didn't need for her to finish the rest of the sentence. He knew, and he immediately put his arms around her and held her until the storm passed. They'd sat up for a long time after that, him listening as she spoke, as she opened up about a horrific and defining event in her life. She eventually settled back into bed and went to sleep in his arms, and he felt closer to her in that moment than he ever had to anyone else in his life.

When she helped him prepare dinner here in his kitchen, it was hard not to think about the morning years ago when she surprised him with breakfast in bed. When she slipped into his t-shirt the night before, it was hard not to recall all of the times she walked around his hotel room or her home wearing little more than one of his button down shirts. When they curled up on the sofa and watched 'Casablanca,' it was impossible for him to not think about their second date, in which they watched her father's old film 'King of the Desert.'

It felt like everything Erica said, everything she did while she was here in his home brought back one memory or another. Even fighting with her now brought back memories of past arguments.

He sighed. "Hayward, what the hell are you doing?" he asked himself under his breath.

Erica was married, and she seemed, well, overall she seemed like she was happy about that. He personally didn't understand why she kept going back to Jackson Montgomery, but it was her life. He had no right to interfere, and interfering was exactly what he was doing by inviting her to stay here, by pushing her to talk about the past. He couldn't help himself though. Their break up and the mess he made of his life afterward was ranked among his life's biggest regrets, right after not immediately going to Bianca about Miranda.

David stood and paced around the living room. He shouldn't have pushed Erica to talk about the past and about what could have been. He was supposed to be helping her, not upsetting her. Still, he argued with himself, he needed to know. He needed to know because he still cared about her. But only as a friend, he told himself. His mind immediately went back to the previous night when he emerged from his bathroom to see her clad only in that silk and lace negligee. Okay, so he was deluding himself to think that he only cared about her as a friend. He wanted her.

He let the idea tumble around in his head as he paced slowly across the room. He wanted her. No, it was more than that. He didn't just want her in a sexual way. He'd missed Erica. He'd missed talking to her and spending time with her and understanding what made her tick. He'd missed watching her sleep beside him and watching her wake with messy hair the next morning. He'd missed plotting and scheming with her and knowing that he had an awesome ally in her. He'd even missed the constant verbal sparring and arguing that came with a relationship with Erica. They were equals in a lot of ways, too damn much alike in others, he readily acknowledged. Still…knowing that there was a chance they could have ended up together, that he could have been with her, been a father figure to Bianca, a grandfather to Miranda even… God, it was devastating to know that the life he'd initially hoped to have with her back in 2000 had again been within his grasp, and he'd thrown it all away.

They'd likely never be together again in a romantic way no matter how much he still desired her, he acknowledged to himself, but if there was a way to have her in his life, to somehow get past her hurt and her anger about Miranda, he'd take it. Even if the only way he could be with her was as her friend and supporter, perhaps that could be enough for him. It would have to be. Given their history, that was probably all it would ever be IF she could find a way to live with the mistakes he'd made.


	47. Chapter 47

Chapter 47

When Erica stomped off to her room, David had waited for the sound of breaking glass and crashing furniture indicating that she was destroying the room in a fit of rage, but he'd heard nothing. He then figured she'd gone to wipe her eyes and calm down, but he was surprised when a good half hour or so passed, and she didn't return. He knew it was cold in the bedrooms with the electricity off, so her refusal to come out surprised him.

Then again, Erica had a tendency to push people away and run when someone hit too close to home, when an emotion touched her in a way that she didn't expect or didn't want to acknowledge. He wondered again just how much she'd meant what she said about how they could have been together – and whether she was now hiding in the guest room because she'd been more honest than she'd planned to be.

He sighed and walked down the chilly hallway to the closed guest room door. He knocked on it while calling out to her, but she didn't respond, and when he turned the knob, he realized she'd locked the door. He knew that meant she wanted to be alone and that he should respect her wishes and walk away, but he couldn't stop himself. Erica always ran from emotions that scared her, and if she was hiding from him now, that meant something. It had to.

He reached up to the top of the door frame and pulled down the key, shaking his head slightly at his own pigheadedness as he unlocked the door and pushed it open.

It was absurdly cold in the room, but despite this, Erica had the drapes open. She was sitting on the bed with her knees pulled up to her chest and a quilt wrapped around her as she gazed out the window at the snow-covered trees. She looked up at him in annoyance when he walked in.

"I locked the door," she said evenly.

He held up the key where she could see it.

She blew out an exasperated sigh. "David, most people consider a locked door a sign to go the hell away."

"I'm not most people," he said.

"I've noticed."

"Erica, it's freezing in here. Please come back to the living room," he said.

She stubbornly shook her head.

"You can't run like you always do when you get uncomfortable. We're snowed in and there's nowhere for you to go," he pointed out.

She glared up at him. "I'm aware of that. That's why I came in here: to get away from you. I can't do this David. I can't relive some of the worst periods of my life, relive pain for which you were at least partially responsible and then sit and chat about some inane subject with you like nothing happened, like it's all okay."

He sighed and looked down at the key in his hands. "I know, and I'm sorry for hurting you, both then and now. Erica, I want to find a way for us to get past this."

She turned on him in fury. "GET PAST THIS?"

She grabbed the nearest object – a pillow – a hurled it at him. He was unsurprised when she got up from the bed, came toward him, and shoved him hard.

"You kept my daughter's baby from her! You let Bianca believe Miranda was DEAD! How in the hell do you expect me to GET PAST THIS?"

He held his hands up in surrender.

"You tell me."

She shook her head at him. "I can't get past this. I can't just forgive and forget."

"I'm not asking – or expecting – you to ever forgive or forget," he said.

That surprised her. "Then what do you want from me David?" she asked angrily.

"I want… I don't know Erica," he admitted. "I don't expect you to ever forget what I did or forgive me for it, but I want to find a way to get past the anger and the hatred. I want to find a way for us to co-exist peaceably. There has to be a way for us to move past this."

She shook her head. "I don't think there is."

"There has to be."

"Why? Why does there have to be? Because The Great David Hayward declares it so? Spare me," she snapped.

"Because you did it before," he said quietly. "You did it for Jack."

She stared up at him in surprise. "What are you talking about?"

"I lied, I kept the truth from you and Bianca, and it cost Bianca about six months with her daughter," he said. "Jack refused to lie for you about your affair, and you lost custody of Bianca. His actions cost you, what, 12 YEARS with your daughter? Had Travis not died, it would have been longer than that."

Erica opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out.

"So I want to know, how did you get past that? How did you find a way to forgive and forget where Jack was concerned? How did you end up with him over and over again, how did you end up MARRIED to him when his actions resulted in you losing your daughter?" he asked.

He knew from the look on her face that she was shocked, and that she'd never once before compared his actions with Jack's.

He stepped forward and placed the key on the bedside table. Then, without another word to her, he turned and left the room, closing the door behind him and leaving her alone.

David half-expected Erica to spend the rest of the day shivering in the guest room, only to emerge when she had to use the bathroom or when she got too hungry to stay locked away. He had said what he wanted to say, and if she wanted to hide from him, he would let her. He had pushed her too far already today.

He was somewhat surprised when she emerged from the bedroom a few hours later.

"Hi," he said softly, smiling at her as he looked up from the book he'd been reading.

She shivered as she moved in front of the fireplace. She sat down on the stone hearth in front of the fire and stared down at her hands in her lap before she spoke.

"What you said about Jack, about me getting past what happened, it's not the same David," she said firmly.

"I think it is," he replied.

She shook her head stubbornly.

"Yes, I lost my daughter. I lost years of her childhood, years that I will never, ever get back, but even at the worst depths of despair – when I was battling a drug addiction and Travis wouldn't let me speak to her, or when I went to jail and he swore he'd cut off all contact until Bianca was 18 – even then David, I knew she was ALIVE! I knew my daughter was alive, and she was well."

"Well?" he repeated. "She wasn't WELL, Erica! She nearly DIED from anorexia, brought on in part by the constant fighting between her parents and by her father's refusal to let her contact you! You said that to me yourself when we were together!"

Anger flashed in her eyes, and she glared at him from her seat on the hearth.

"She was ALIVE, David! I knew she was alive. I could still dream about getting her back. I could intervene to try to save her from starving herself to death! I could still talk to her, still visit her. I could still have hopes and dreams for her future. You took that from Bianca! You took that from her when you took her baby away from her!"

"I didn't take Miranda from her," he pointed out. "I had NOTHING to do with that. I didn't force Bianca and Babe into that storm. I didn't make Babe call Paul Cramer. Paul Cramer set this ALL in motion, Erica, and you know it! HE took little Adam for his sister to claim as her own. HE told Adam and JR that the lone baby in his possession was Babe's daughter, not Bianca's. HE told EVERYONE involved that Bianca's daughter was lost in the helicopter crash. Not me. I didn't cause any of this."

"You let it continue!" she said angrily as she jumped to her feet. "You let her continue to believe that her precious little girl, her hope for the future, her reason to keep going despite the rape and the murder and the trial was DEAD! You let her continue to believe that her child died a horrific death, her tiny broken body washed away by the icy currents of a river! My God, David!"

"Do you know how many times Bianca came to me and begged me to be a father to Babe? How many times she extolled Babe as a wonderful young woman, a great friend, an amazing mother? How many times she told me how BLESSED I was to suddenly have a grown daughter after losing Leora? Do you have any idea how difficult it was for me to try to make sense of this entire mess when the one person I was trying to help kept unknowingly pushing me the other direction?" he asked.

"Do you think that's an excuse?" she spit back.

"No," he admitted softly. He paced across the living room and paused with his back to her. "I just want you to try to understand. I wanted to do the right thing. I wanted to help Bianca, but I had just been given a daughter, a grown daughter, who we all believed had lost her baby as well, who swore that if 'Bess' had not been put in her arms when she was recovering from that postpartum infection, she would not have had the will to live. Erica, I was trying to stall for time and find a way to cause the least amount of damage."

"By letting my daughter suffer! By letting Bianca continue to believe that her child was DEAD! I can't believe you can stand there and try to justify what you did, the way you let my daughter continue to suffer by blaming it on her for trying to encourage your relationship with your trampy daughter!" Erica said angrily.

David brushed aside the remark about Babe as he turned to face Erica. "I am NOT blaming it on Bianca!" he snapped. "You know, Erica, it's the height of hypocrisy that you can stand here in judgment of me for not putting Miranda back in Bianca's arms immediately when you did the _same damn thing_ to Edmund and Maria!"

Erica took a step back and drew in a sharp breath. David noted silently that she looked as if she'd been slapped in the face.

"That was a low blow," she whispered, her face a mixture of shock and hurt.

"No lower than yours," he responded. "You want to hate me for what I did when you've done practically the same thing to someone else."

She was uncharacteristically silent for a moment, and David wasn't sure what to say. He knew he'd struck a nerve, but he'd expected Erica to fight back, to yell and scream and pound her fists on his chest and tell him how wrong he was, how her actions were _nothing_ like his – even though she'd gone to jail for hers. They were alike, so very alike that it amazed him at times. They'd both done horrible things, caused others tremendous pain… the only difference he could see was that he at least owned up to his crimes. Erica on the other hand preferred to pretend hers never existed.

Erica sat back down on the hearth and put her head in her hands for a long moment.

David stared at her and waited for her to respond. He somehow doubted that she really wanted to continue along this line of conversation, not with the whole Maddie Gray mess thrown in her face like that.

"I'm the one who expected Jack to lie," she said in a quiet voice when she finally lifted her head.

He sat down on the sofa, unsurprised at the turn in conversation. He knew she hated to be called on her own hypocrisy, and apparently she was done yelling at him over Miranda. He waited with bated breath for her to continue. He'd wondered for years how she'd gotten past the blow up with Jack over Bianca's custody trial. He knew how she tended to hold a grudge, but at the same time, she'd gone back to Montgomery over and over again, and he'd never understood why, especially when she expressed such loathing at David for what HE'D done regarding Bianca and Miranda.

"Jack wanted me to just end the marriage when Travis slept with Barbara to conceive another child in the hopes of creating a sibling bone marrow match for Molly. I was furious with him, but Bianca wanted so badly for her family to be together, and I couldn't break her heart. I couldn't tear up her family and hurt her the way my father hurt me," Erica said with a faraway look on her face.

David nodded. Based on everything he knew about Erica, that sounded like something she'd do.

"But I couldn't stay away from Jack. I loved him. I remarried Travis to try to do what was best for Bianca, but my heart… my heart was with Jack. When I found out Travis had betrayed me like that, I didn't want to save my marriage. I just wanted to be with the man I loved. But Bianca… Bianca couldn't handle that. She couldn't handle the idea of her mother moving on with her Uncle Jack."

She paused for a moment as if to catch her breath.

"Travis knew Bianca saw us kiss because she set fire to her dollhouse as a result, and he knew that we'd slept together because he caught us in Jack's hotel room, in his bed. I'd taken off my wedding rings and accepted Jack's engagement ring again. Travis was furious… I'd never seen him that angry."

"So you lied about the affair," David prompted, wanting to get away from the mental image of Erica in bed with Jackson Montgomery.

She nodded. "I… I thought it would look better if the judge thought Jack and I had just been together that one time, rather than it being an on-going affair, which it was. I wanted him to lie for me, and I was so certain he would, so certain he'd do anything and everything for us to have the life together that we'd planned. We were going to raise Bianca together. Travis had Molly and another child on the way with Barbara, and I just assumed… I didn't think he'd push so hard to take Bianca from me. Jack and I were going to get married and raise Bianca and have a child of our own together. All Jack had to do was sit there on the stand and confirm what I'd said. Just a little white lie, just one."

"And the saintly Jackson Montgomery refused to tell a lie," David said sarcastically.

Erica glared at him. "Jack is a good man, an honorable man! I asked him to do something that went against everything he believed in!" she said in her husband's defense.

David laughed incredulously. "He was SLEEPING with his BROTHER'S WIFE! The man was far beyond honorable and decent at that point!"

"YOU asked. YOU wanted to know how I got past that! Are you going to let me finish or not?" she demanded.

David exhaled in frustration and flopped down in a chair. "Go ahead. Enlighten me."

"Jack's refusal to lie, his insistence on telling the truth did cost me Bianca, and it hurt me more than I ever thought possible. I tried to push him away, but he wouldn't let me," she said. "We tried to make the relationship work after I lost Bianca, but it was there, always there, and we broke up for superficial and stupid reasons not long after. Eventually I realized that I did still love him, and if I hadn't lied on the witness stand, well, I don't know how it would have affected the outcome of the custody trial – admitting the affair like that – but we could have stayed together."

She paused for a moment, trying to gather her thoughts, trying to put complex emotions into words. "His refusal to lie for me… he put his own self-interest above mine, and he hurt me more than I ever thought possible. I had so much anger toward him, and I couldn't bear the pain of his betrayal and the loss of my daughter. But at some point…well, at some point I realized that I still loved him."

She ran her fingers through her hair and pushed out a shaky breath. "I don't know that I'll ever forget it, forget the time I lost with Bianca, the way our relationship was forever altered. But I had to own up to my part in that, my lie and my demand that he go along with it. The truth is that I still loved him, and I had to let go of my anger at him to move on with my life and to have Jack in my life."

David stared at her incredulously. He wasn't sure if he should laugh or curse at this revelation. She'd forgiven Montgomery and let go of the past because she wanted him, and that was the only way to have him.

"So you got past losing your daughter, missing out on raising her, because hey, it was worth it to forgive and forget so you could screw Jackson Montgomery," he said with a bitter laugh.

Her eyes flashed in anger at him. "I LOVE Jack!" she snapped. "I've loved him, off and on, since Bianca was a little girl. There's… I don't know… there's something that keeps pulling us back to each other. He's always there, in my life."

She shook her head at him, frustrated that he didn't seem to understand the situation. "I didn't say it was rational or logical. It just IS. It's no more rational or logical than how I feel about you," she blew out before she could stop herself.

David froze at her words.

Erica regretted the words as soon as they tumbled from her mouth. No, she didn't want to admit that she had feelings of any kind for him. Not now, not after everything that had happened between them, good and bad. She stared at him in shock, wanting desperately to take back the last sentence, wanting to get up and run back to the guest room and lock the door.

David finally blew out the breath he was holding and stood up from the sofa. He slid an ottoman over to the edge of the fireplace and sat down on it across from Erica.

He looked into her luminous brown eyes for a moment and then spoke.

"How do you feel about me?"


	48. Chapter 48

Chapter 48

"I want to hate you," she vehemently. "You lied to me about Dimitri. You lied to me about Bianca's pregnancy. You kept Miranda from her real family."

"But?" he responded, sensing that there was definitely more to what she was feeling than just hate.

She clasped her hands together so they wouldn't shake. The fire suddenly felt too hot, and she instinctively wanted to jump up from the hearth and run back to the chilly guest bedroom and lock the door tightly. Oh God, why had she said anything at all? Before this entire mess with Jonathan Kinder, she'd been so good at controlling her emotions around David. She'd allowed herself to feel nothing but disdain, hatred, and anger toward him. But staying with him, talking to him, arguing with him as he dredged up a past she'd preferred to keep out of sight and out of mind… he had her all twisted around.

"Erica?" he asked, waiting for her to answer his question.

He'd moved closer to her now, and she realized to her dismay that there was no way for her to get up from her seat in front of the fire without touching David in some way. That certainly wasn't an option – she wasn't sure she could control the torrent of conflicting emotions she was feeling if they touched – so she sat frozen in place, willing herself to ignore just how close he was to her or how intensely he was gazing at her, as if he could see into her, see parts of her she preferred to hide.

"You were right last night, when you said that there is something there between us that never goes away. I don't know how to explain it or define it," she said carefully. "But it's there, and I…I want to hate you. I _do_ hate you…"

She glanced down and wished she hadn't. Oh God, if he moved his hand just a few inches it would land on her leg. She tried to keep her breathing stable and her heart from racing. He was gazing at her with such an intense look in his eyes. She couldn't do this with him, she couldn't go there. She'd already said far too much. She was married to Jack, he was the love of her life, and they were happy. They had been happy, before Jonathan Kinder. And then David had come back into her life, he'd saved her life and her sanity, and he'd treated her with such compassion. The man she'd once loved, the man she'd once wanted to marry was still there in him after all. It was incomprehensible to her how she could be so angry with him and need him at the same time.

"But you can't let go," he said quietly.

She swallowed hard and nodded.

"You need me in your life in some way," he finished for her.

She knew she should turn away from him or at the very least, look away, but somehow her eyes were locked with his, and she couldn't move. She was so relieved that he'd managed to put her confused feelings into words for her.

"I need you in my life too," he admitted.

She managed a slight nod, afraid to attempt to say anything else.

David exhaled and offered her a slight smile. He seemed almost… relieved? She wasn't sure why he should feel relief – it wasn't as if she'd declared her love for him. If anything, this entire conversation should have left him thoroughly confused and frustrated with her. Frankly she didn't feel as if she'd set him – or herself – straight. He'd hurt her and her family so badly, but he'd also saved her. She hated him but she needed him. She felt safe with him, and yet she feared him. No, that wasn't right, she thought. She didn't fear him. If anything, she trusted him more than most people in Pine Valley did. No, she feared what she might do or say when she was around him. Like right now.

David reached out tentatively and brushed his fingertips against her cheek. Everything in Erica screamed to get up, push him away, move as fast and far from him as she could, but somehow she couldn't move. She couldn't even tear her eyes from his.

He leaned in closer to her. This was it. She knew he would kiss her now. She was overwhelmed to realize that a part of her, a part of her she didn't like to even admit existed wanted this. The rational, logical part of her brain screamed at her to shove him back and yell at him for even thinking about touching her, but that part of her mind no longer seemed like it had any control.

She nodded slightly and managed to gasp a soft "yes" just before his lips brushed against hers. The kiss was gentle, tentative even, but the touch of his lips against hers sent shock waves through her body.

He pulled back, just a fraction of an inch so her lips were just out of reach, as if he was waiting for her reaction, be it good or bad.

Why had he pulled back? God, why was he teasing her like that? His hand was still on her cheek. What the hell was he waiting for? After a few tortuous seconds, Erica couldn't wait any longer. She reached up with trembling hands and touched his face and his hair.

David responded instantly, pressing his lips to hers again. It was a less passionate kiss than she'd expected, as if he was afraid to move too quickly, and for that, she was grateful. Still it would be far, far too easy to get lost in the feel of his lips, soft and warm and sensuous against hers and the touch of his fingertips on her curve of her jaw.

The last bit of common sense she possessed was screaming at Erica to push David away, to tell him 'no' before the situation got even further out of hand, but oh God, his other hand was on her knee now, and she was responding to his touch.

God help her, she was kissing him back.

In the distance, something buzzed, and the lights flickered overhead.

They both froze. David pulled back from the kiss first, his eyes wide with surprise and filled with desire. Erica stared back, trying to control her breathing.

For several moments, neither one of them spoke, but they both knew that the electricity coming back on had snapped them back to reality.

"Power's back on," David said softly, his eyes never leaving hers.

She nodded slightly as the gravity of their situation began to sink in to her. She was married, married to a man she considered to be the love of her life, and yet she was here in another man's home, wearing his clothes, touching him, kissing him.

"I…" she started to say. Get away from him, she told herself. Move now, before you make an even bigger mistake.

"I'm sorry. This was a really bad idea," she whispered as she stood up and moved away from the fireplace. As she did so, his hand curved around the back of her thigh. She wasn't sure if he meant to steady her as she pushed past him or if he meant it to be a seductive touch. She was ashamed to admit that the feel of his hand on her leg brought make memories, far too many glorious, sensual memories.

"We shouldn't have…" Oh God, she'd done this. He'd kissed her first, tentatively, but she'd been the one to reach for him, to put her hands on his face, in his hair.

"It's okay," he offered in a calm voice as he stood up as well. "I'm the one who kissed you first."

"I know, but I…" her hand shook as she gestured toward the ottoman.

"It's okay," he repeated. "You… you're dealing with a lot right now, and I dumped even more on you by bringing up a lot of bad memories and difficult subjects."

She nodded, unsure of what to say next. She was relieved that he wasn't upset with her for responding to the kiss and then pushing him away, and she wasn't sure where they went from here. Did he want to pretend the kiss never happened? Did he want to kiss her again?

Dear God, she still had another night to spend here with him. No, no, that wasn't an option. She absolutely could not stay here alone with David. It was too dangerous. This had all been a horrible, awful idea. If the electricity was back on, then perhaps the roads had been plowed out to David's cabin, and she could get back into town. She could go home. Wait, no, that wasn't an option. She had no desire to be alone in her house. She didn't feel safe there, especially not without Jack.

Jack… oh Jack. Oh God, he'd never forgive her for this! If he ever found out… She shook her head, as if doing so would erase her actions like the lines on an etch-a-sketch. She loved Jack. She wanted Jack. It didn't matter what David said to her, how he looked at her, or how he made her pulse race with just a touch. She needed to get out of here, and fast, before she did any more damage to her marriage.

"I have to go," she said abruptly, turning on her heel and leaving David speechless in her wake.


	49. Chapter 49

_Author's Note: I am so sorry for the lapse in this story! I have been working hard with a fellow writer here on some video clips and a new fan website, and it's taking up so much more time than I'd anticipated. I haven't abandoned any of my stories though. I hope you'll stay with me until the end. As always, feedback is welcomed and appreciated._

Chapter 49

Erica ducked her head and rushed past David, headed for the relative safety of the guest bedroom. She quickly closed the door behind her and stripped off David's sweater and the t-shirt of his she'd worn to bed the night before. How stupid had that been? She couldn't believe she'd let herself get talked into wearing his clothes! Stupid, stupid, stupid! She dressed quickly in her own clothes, cursing herself the entire time.

She had to get out of here. That thought was burned into her mind as she frantically repacked her suitcases. She had to get out of this house and far, far away from David Hayward.

"What the hell are you doing?"

Erica had been distracted by the frantic repacking that she hadn't even heard the door open behind her.

"You don't even KNOCK?" she said angrily. "Let me guess – you were hoping to catch me undressed?"

He tilted his head at her, giving her a look that clearly indicated he had no interest in fighting over mundane matters like whether or not he'd knocked on the door when they had far bigger issues in front of them.

"Erica…" he started to say.

"I'm leaving," she announced.

He stared incredulously at her. "You can't be serious."

She paused to look at him. "Oh I am entirely serious."

He ran his fingers through his hair and watched as she slammed a suitcase shut and zipped it.

"Erica, don't be ridiculous," he said.

She turned to glare at him. "Ridiculous? Oh, I think not. My leaving is far, far from ridiculous, and we both know it!"

"You're running."

"I'm going HOME," she said sharply.

"To sit alone?"

"To wait for my HUSBAND to come home, which is where I should have been this entire time!" she snapped.

"How many hours of sleep did you get last night?" he asked.

She stopped packing for a moment and looked at him as if he'd lost his mind. "What?"

"Answer me."

"I don't know, almost 12 I guess," she said with a shrug.

"And would you have slept for almost 12 hours if you were alone in that big, empty house?" he prompted, "Or would you have been in a panic over the slightest odd noise?"

Erica looked down, not wanting to meet his eyes and let him see that yes, she absolutely would have been in a panic over every little noise if she'd stayed alone in the house she shared with her husband, the house where this entire nightmare began.

"I can't stay here," she said quietly as she packed.

"Look, if this is about the kiss – I'm sorry," he said quietly.

"You shouldn't have done that!" she snapped, hoping he would have the good sense to not throw it in her face that she'd kissed him back.

"I know," he admitted. "I don't know what I was thinking."

He looked away then, but she caught the expression on his face before he did. She knew that expression. She'd seen it on his face repeatedly when they were together, keeping their relationship a secret from Pine Valley and the world. She'd seen that look on his face in New York City, when she'd first realized that yes, David Hayward had feelings for her. Real, true, intense feelings, feelings that went beyond lust. She'd welcomed that expression back then, but it made her so uneasy now.

"I need to leave," she said firmly.

He turned to look at her then. "What? Erica, no! You can't be serious," he said incredulously.

"I'm absolutely serious. I need to go. I'll go to Opal's – it's where I'm supposed to be anyway," she said insistently.

"Come here," he said, reaching for her arm.

Erica jerked back, pulling her arm away, but not before he grasped at her elbow.

"What? No! What are you doing?" she asked as he came toward her.

"I want to show you something," he said as he took her by the arm and practically dragged her out of the room.

"What are you doing? David! David, let me go!" she demanded as he pulled her to the front door.

He unlocked the front door to the cabin and flung it open with a flourish. Erica shivered as a gust of cold air hit her.

"Would you stop arguing with me long enough to really LOOK outside, Erica?"

He released her arm then and she glared at him for a second before looking past him. The front porch shielded the door from at least part of Mother Nature's onslaught, but beyond it, snow was piled up nearly two feet high, blocking the path to her car.

Speaking of her car… Erica's heart sank when she realized that her white Jaguar appeared to be nothing more than an oddly-shaped lump of snow. She shuddered to think how long it would take her to dig out the car.

"So we'll dig it out. You have a snow shovel, right? And someone who plows your driveway?" she said desperately.

"Yeah, I do, but Erica, look past your car. Look down the road," he said, gesturing to the end of the driveway.

She gripped the doorway for support, shivering again as a gust of wind blew snow from the coated tree branches. Beyond her car, down the driveway, she could just make out the road in a sea of white: it was the white space that wasn't filled by trees.

"The snowplows haven't made it out this far yet," David said in a soothing voice. "They'll be here, probably later tonight or sometime in the morning. They're probably still busy clearing city streets in Pine Valley. Yes, I do have a guy who plows my driveway, but I'm sure he's swamped too. I can call him, but I'm sure he'll be here."

"I need to go now. I can't stay here," she said, backing away from David as he closed the door.

"Erica, even if you could dig out a path to your car and dig it out of the snow, it's too deep for you to try to make it out of the driveway. I'm sorry, but you're stuck here until sometime tomorrow."

Erica ran her fingers through her hair and tried to still her racing heart. Stuck here overnight again? With David?

"Look, I know you're not thrilled with the idea, but we don't really have a choice. I didn't get shot saving your life so you could turn around and kill yourself in a car accident in the snow," he said. "I've already saved you once when we crashed in a blizzard – I'm not willing to take another chance like that with your life or mine."

She turned to face him then, and she wished she hadn't. Damn him for bringing up that blizzard and the car accident that scarred her face and inadvertently drew them together.

"We can't do this," she said in a barely audible voice.

He nodded slowly.

"I'm sorry, okay," he offered.

She crossed her arms and appraised him for a moment.

"For what?" she asked finally.

He raised an eyebrow. "For bringing up Miranda. This probably wasn't the best time for me to do that. You've got enough on your mind already."

Erica took that in. He wasn't sorry he'd kissed her. Was that what he meant?

"I think… I think it needed to happen. The conversation about Miranda, I mean."

She paused and looked at the flames in the fireplace. "You gave me a lot to think about," she admitted.

He raised an eyebrow. "Is that an admission that maybe you judged me too harshly?" he asked.

"No," she said flatly.

He laughed at that. She'd been through a hell of an ordeal, but she was still the same Erica he knew and loved.

"Okay, fair enough," he said. "I know you're not thrilled about being stuck here until tomorrow, but we'll make the best of it. No more difficult conversations. The electricity is back on, and your room should heat up soon. You're free to avoid me all you want."

He turned on his heel and retreated to his bedroom before Erica could respond, closing the door firmly behind him.


	50. Chapter 50

_This is just a short 'calm before the storm' chapter. Stay tuned because Jack is coming back, and it's not going to be pretty._

Chapter 50

David emerged from his room for an uncomfortably quiet dinner with Erica. He was both relieved and disappointed when she opted to sleep in the guest room that night - disappointed because he'd already gotten used to staying with her when she fell asleep, and relieved because he wasn't sure how well he could control himself if she was in the bed beside him. He was only human after all.

Erica spent most of her time after dinner in the hall bathroom, showering and doing God-knows what else in there. He sucked in a hard breath when she finally came back into the living room to say goodnight. She was wearing a black satin robe and was rubbing an exotically fragrant lotion into her hands. She smiled slightly at him and informed him that she would be in her room working on her laptop for a bit before she went to bed.

He watched her walk down the hall, and as soon as her door closed, he got up and poured himself a stiff drink. He didn't like to around her, but God, he needed this if he was going to be able to get through the next 24 hours. It still blew his mind that they'd kissed. No, not just that they'd kissed – that she'd kissed him back. She'd admitted that she cared about him, that there was something between them still that hadn't gone away, despite what he'd done to Bianca and Miranda. If the electricity hadn't come back on, would she have stopped him?

David realized as he sipped his drink that he wouldn't have stopped, not unless she'd told him no. He'd have made love to her right there in front of the fireplace if she'd been willing. Just the thought of how gorgeous her naked figure would look in front of the dancing flames was enough to make him catch his breath. He wanted her, not as a mindless fling or as just another beautiful woman. He wanted her. Erica. All of her. Body, heart, mind and soul.

He tossed back the rest of his scotch and headed for his own bathroom. He was definitely in need of more than just a drink. He was in need a cold shower too.

Hours later, David awoke with a start, sitting up in his bed suddenly. He looked around the dark room and remembered that he was not alone in the house. Erica was asleep in the guest room down the hall. He paused for a moment as his eyes adjusted to the darkness. He wasn't sure what had woken him, but he was suddenly compelled to check on Erica.

He slipped out of bed and walked quietly to her room, pausing outside the closed door to listen. As he pushed the door open, he realized that she was crying quietly. Erica gasped as David stepped into the room. She hadn't meant to wake him.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

"Don't be," he said as he moved to the bed, stumbling over one of her suitcases. "Nightmare?"

He could barely see her in the darkness, but he could hear her soft, "yes."

"It's over, and you're safe now," he said quietly as he sat down beside her. She moved immediately to him, burying her face against his shirt. He put his arms around her and tried to soothe her.

"Stay with me, please," she whispered.

"Of course," he said in a soft voice.

She pulled back from him enough to slide over and make room for him on the double bed. He slipped into the bed beside her and wrapped blankets around both of them. He made sure she had plenty of room in the bed, but she curled up next to him anyway, resting her head on his arm and shoulder. He sighed and tried to lie still as he listened for her breathing to steady and fall into the rhythmic pattern indicating sleep. In just a few minutes, she was sleeping peacefully beside him. It amazed him how quickly she could back to sleep when he joined her in the bed. Perhaps it was his ego at work, but he liked to believe that he somehow really did make her feel that safe, that protected.


	51. Chapter 51

Chapter 51

Neither one of them wanted to discuss the inevitable: it was Sunday, and Jack would be home that night with Lily. Erica was going to leave. David didn't particularly want her to go, but he didn't know what magical combination of words would convince her to stay. The road had been plowed in the wee hours of the morning, and they'd both heard the snowplow as it cleared his driveway, so barring another freak snowfall in the next few hours, she was definitely leaving. Hell, it was probably for the best if she left. The last few days had been an emotional roller coaster already.

It was early afternoon when Erica dozed off on the sofa while ostensibly working on her laptop.

"Hey… Erica?" David nudged her gently when he realized she'd fallen asleep.

She startled and nearly dropped the computer.

"What?"

"Go lie down. Go take a nap. You might as well," he offered.

"Why would I do that?" she asked in surprise.

"Your body is obviously still trying to catch up on sleep. Go take a nap. I'll wake you up in plenty of time to get dressed so you can go home."

She hesitated for a moment. "I'm already mostly packed. I guess I could sleep for a little while."

"Go ahead."

She eyed him warily as she closed her laptop and stood up.

"Do you mind if I sleep in your room?" she asked.

He raised an eyebrow at her.

"No. Any particular reason?"

"Your bed is more comfortable," she admitted with a sheepish expression on her face.

David laughed. "Yeah, help yourself. Do you want me to sit with you until you fall asleep?"

"No! No I, um, I'll be fine," she said quickly as she moved past him. "Will you wake me up by 4 pm? I'd like to have plenty of time to shower and dress before I go home."

"Yeah, of course. Four o'clock," he said.

He watched as she walked to his bedroom, her bare feet padding softly across the wood floors. God he was going to miss her. He hated that she was leaving. He wanted to tell her to stay, to spend more time here with him, but he knew she'd never agree.

David returned to his work but curiosity over whether Erica had been able to sleep or not got the better of him and he eventually decided to check on her. He was pleasantly surprised when he saw her curled up in the middle of the bed, dressed in one of his t-shirts. She was sound asleep on her side with the blankets pulled around her. He leaned against the door frame and watched her sleep. He loved the peaceful expression on her face, and the way her body gently rose and fell with each breath. He couldn't help but wonder what she was dreaming. After a long while, he finally closed the bedroom door and went back to the living room.

It was almost 3:30 when David was startled by a loud noise. He looked up from his desk and realized that someone was banging on his door. He frowned in confusion as he got up to answer the door. He certainly wasn't expecting anyone.

He threw the door open to find Jackson Montgomery standing on his doorstep with a furious look on his face.

"Where the hell is my wife?" he demanded.

David was stunned to see Erica's husband on his doorstep. He clearly knew Erica was there at the cabin, but David had no idea how he'd pieced it all together.

"Jackson. Good to see you too," he said as Jack shoved past him into the cabin. "I don't recall inviting you in."

"ERICA!" Jack yelled as he stepped into the living room.

"Excuse me, you can't just barge into my home without my permission," David snapped.

"Keep your voice down," David gritted out, hoping that he could keep Erica asleep in the bedroom until he figured out a way to get rid of her husband. How the hell had Montgomery even known she was here?

Jack whirled around, "I know she's here. Where is she?"

David shrugged. "How would I know?"

Jack looked like he was about to say something, but no sound came out of his mouth. He had a shocked expression on his face, and he was looking at something behind David. David turned then and saw Erica, standing in the doorway to his bedroom with a stunned look on her face. She was still wearing his faded Phillies t-shirt and her hair was tousled from sleep. Visible behind her was his unmade bed. The robe and negligee she'd been wearing on Friday night before he'd made her change were on the floor by the foot of the bed.

"Oh my God," was the only thing Jack could manage to say.


	52. Chapter 52

Chapter 52

Erica's eyes went wide with shock at the sight of her husband standing there in the middle of David Hayward's home. She knew how bad it must look, how guilty she must look to him. Jack was aghast, and he looked as if he'd been punched in the stomach. Erica rushed forward, intent on saying something, anything, to diffuse the situation, but it was too late.

"You son of a bitch," Jack swore as his fist connected with David's face.

She yelled "No!" as she ran to David and Jack, throwing herself between the two men.

"Jack, please, no! Stop!" she cried.

Jack looked at her in disgust. "Of course, protecting your lover," he swore at her. "Why am I not surprised?"

Erica looked at her husband and then at David. "David is not my lover," she insisted.

"No? Well, let me see Erica, you're shacking up with him. You lied to me about where you were going to be. You just walked out of his bedroom wearing his clothes, and unless David's into cross-dressing, I'm pretty damn sure that's your lingerie on the floor of his bedroom," he said angrily. "What the hell am I supposed to think?"

"I know it looks bad," she said desperately, putting a hand on his chest in an attempt to calm him, "But it's not. It's… nothing happened."

Jack shoved her hand away as he scoffed at her. "Like I'm going to believe that?"

"It's the truth!" Erica swore.

"Please. How stupid do you think I am? I just want to know, how long were you sleeping with him before Kinder kidnapped you? I guess it makes sense now that he ran off after you."

Erica was taken aback. "David and I are not having an affair!"

They weren't, she insisted silently to herself. Okay, so he still had feelings for her, and she felt something completely undefinable for him, something that wasn't entirely hatred, and he'd kissed her, but it was NOT an affair, and she had to make Jack understand that!

David stood behind Erica, rubbing his jaw and glaring at her husband. He was well aware of how bad the situation had to look to Jack, but he didn't like the way Jack was talking to Erica. She glanced back at him, and it was clear from the look on her face that she expected him to confirm her story but not throw any punches of his own.

"Erica is telling you the truth, Jack," he ground out. "We're not having an affair."

"Like I'm going to believe a liar like you, Hayward?" Jack said in disgust.

"How did you know I was here?" Erica demanded, moving slightly to the right in the hopes of keeping Jack from pushing past her to punch David again.

"Reggie told me," Jack spit out at her.

"Reggie? But I talked to him yesterday…" she started to say.

Jack rolled his eyes. "Reggie called Opal's to check on you on Friday. Opal wasn't home but her maid said you hadn't been there in weeks, so he followed you from the studio and he saw you pick up Hayward and come back here with him."

"You sent Reggie to SPY on me?"

She was horrified. She'd thought she and Reggie were closer than that, that if he'd had concerns about something she was doing, he'd come to her rather than run to Jackson. Apparently she'd underestimated both Reggie's desire to protect Jack and his dislike for David Hayward.

"Reggie was NOT spying on you, Erica. He was worried about you. We've all been worried about you. He called me this morning to tell me that you were staying here with Hayward. I told him he had to be mistaken, that there was no way you were actually staying here, but he drove out here to see for himself this morning as soon as the road was clear and said he was sure you were here with Hayward," Jack snapped, "So I got on the first plane home, and it turns out that Reggie was absolutely right. Have you been here since I left?"

Erica raised her chin defiantly at Jack. "Yes, I have."

The vein in Jack's forehead bulged and his face contorted in anger at his wife. "Go put your clothes on. We're leaving," he snapped.

David was appalled at way Jack was talking to Erica, and from the way she visibly tensed and squared her delicate shoulders, he had a feeling that Erica wasn't going to take it lying down.

"Excuse me?" she gasped.

"I said: go put your clothes on. Get your things. We're going home," he said through clenched teeth. He reached for her upper arm and attempted to pull her toward him.

"Don't you DARE order me around, Jackson Montgomery! Who do you think you are?" she blew back as she jerked her arm from his grasp.

"Your HUSBAND, Erica!" he snapped.

"Yes, my husband, not my lord and master. You don't get to tell me what to do. I'm an adult, Jack. I'm not a teenager who stayed out past curfew," she said, trying to control the anger in her own voice.

"And as your husband, I have a right to know where my wife is staying when I'm out of town, and I have every right to be furious that you're half-dressed and emerging from your ex-lover's bedroom," he retorted. "I'd like you to _please_ put your clothes on, and we will continue this conversation in the privacy of our home."

"No. I'm not leaving right now. Not like this," she said stubbornly with a shake of her head.

Jack stared at her in disbelief. "What? You'd throw away our marriage, everything we've built together for this? For him?"

She flinched. "I'm not throwing anything away, Jack! I love you! I was being truthful when I said that I didn't cheat on you, on us. I was in there taking a NAP. I have not done anything wrong, and I am not about to stand here and let you cross examine me like I'm an accused murderer you have on the witness stand! Nor am I am going to let you throw me over your shoulder and drag me back to the house like a caveman," she blew out in anger. "I will come home when I am ready to come home, and that is NOT right this minute."

Jack shook his head at her. "I don't believe you! I don't believe this! Where is your luggage, or have you been prancing around here in Hayward's clothes for the past four days?"

He didn't wait for a response and instead turned on his heel and pushed past David to stalk into the master bedroom.

David was livid at this point and was ready to throw a few punches of his own. He grabbed Erica's arm and stopped her as she tried to turn to follow Jack into the master bedroom. The panicked look on her face made his heart lurch.

"Don't. He's not willing to listen to you right now," he said quietly. "He needs to calm down."

Erica shot a worried glance in the direction of the master bedroom. David was right. Deep down, she knew David was right. When Jack was like this, he was too angry to listen to reason. Over the years she'd learned that if she pushed too hard where Jack was concerned, she only made the situation worse. Still, she felt compelled to do SOMETHING! It wasn't in her nature to sit back and wait for a man to come to his senses. She was Erica Kane, after all, and she was a firm believer in standing her ground and arguing her point. She looked back at David and nodded slightly.

"I know," she breathed in a barely audible voice.

Jack stormed back out of the master bedroom seconds later, just in time to see David with his hand on Erica's arm and their eyes locked together. "I leave the room for a second, and you can't wait to grope my wife," he spit out in disgust.

"GET. OUT." David ground out, wishing like hell he didn't have an arm in a sling, wishing he could punch Erica's husband in the face without upsetting her.

"Not without my wife," Jack said angrily.

David moved to position himself between Erica and Jack, fully aware that if Jack started throwing punches again, it wasn't exactly going to be a fair fight or one in his favor.

"Erica's an adult. She comes and goes as she pleases, and she's already told you that she is not leaving with you right now, so back off and get the hell out of my house."

Jack shook his head in disgust at his wife and at David and then turned on his heel and left without another word, slamming the front door behind him.


End file.
